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milesrdavis
Reviews
Doctor Who: Orphan 55 (2020)
Episode no. Whatever: A Scolding on Climate Change
Do you like science? Do you like data? Do you like critical analysis? Doctor Who used to. Amongst the absurdities of intergalactic time travel, science was always held up as the basis for civilization's advancement. Now it's held hostage by a culture that demands you accept what they have defined as the scientific consensus-when the reality is there is no such consensus. Climate change is real, that isn't a question. What's absolutely questionable is the immediacy and scale of danger it poses; not to mention how much mankind actually truly contributes to it.
Didn't come here for a discussion on climate change? Well too bad! I didn't come to Doctor Who for it! But here we both are.
The Fall of the House of Usher (2023)
Stand Aside, AHS
By far the best of the Flanagan series. Concept, acting, production, all. It might have some overzealous tendencies, but overall it stands out as one of the better things to come out in a while.
The gamble taken by revealing the fates of the Usher dynasty from the beginning pays off as each episode-as per the Flanagan method-expands on each character individually. By the time the credits role on the last episode, everything came full circle in a satisfying way. Adding the Poe references could easily have made it hammy, but actually contributed to the whole I think pretty well.
Bruce Greenwood's performance is matched skillfully by Mary McDonnell and both barely rank below the beautiful and talented Carla Gugino. Mark Hamill, meanwhile, does a very good job in the gig he's in, but felt a little wasted. Meanwhile some of the regulars from previous series competently stand on their own feet. The young Kyliegh Curran avoided the standard I expect from young actors and actually contributed without being much of a nuisance.
And finally, the way they handled the flashbacks and various stylistic choices in the storytelling grew remarkably from early entries to the growing Flanaverse. Where the 'House' series struggled to make it feel organic, Usher lands the twists and jumps spot on.
Very glad they've continued working with Mr. Flanagan. Frankly the franchise feels like a mellowed out American Horror Story-at least the first few seasons. Amazing what you can accomplish when you don't rely on shock value.
Frasier: The Good Father (2023)
Caviar Returns to Bean Town
From the start, I have held back any hope of being pleased with this reboot. Fool me once, twice, thrice or more times, shame on you...
But they did the impossible and managed to recapture the same feeling I've looked to relive through countless streamings of reruns over the years.
Kelsey Grammer's return couldn't have been timed better, with the deluge of junk content that has been spewing out at us, I genuinely forgot how to enjoy a sitcom all the way through an episode.
The way they memorialize John Mahoney made a genuinely touching moment; recognizing the significance of that relationship while not hinging the episode on it was skillfully and respectfully executed.
There's some growing pains to be found, but much as the first season of the original had its flaws, there is so much potential. The new actors are mostly great, and I like that the whole thing has a familiar dynamic whole being something new.
As a diehard Frasier fan, I cannot emphasize too strongly the need to blow this show up with watches and reviews. We've waited this long for something good to come along. Don't you dare ruin this for me.
No One Will Save You (2023)
Simon Doesn't Say
I'm a big fan of Alfred Hitchcock and The Twilight Zone, and this entire movie carries some of the same vibes. It takes what is familiar and ordinary to increasingly unfamiliar levels. Unfortunately it overreaches by the end, and what could've been a much stronger film ends up lacking a bit.
If you don't already know the main schtick to this one and want to find out yourself, stop here. No spoilers to the story below, but there's a spin to the thing.
It took me longer than some I'm sure to catch on that most of the film would have no dialogue. Kaitlyn Dever (Brynn) does an outstanding job in that respect. So much so that I found myself disappointed in the end that the movie didn't forgo dialogue altogether.
The end isn't what I expected, and not in a good way. The last 20 minutes or so are what keep this from being an 8 for me. They take a bit of an abrupt turn into heady space, having gone smoothly most of the way.
Give it a go if you're in for something different, but not too different; but also know it does come to the much end of different.
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Funny story, I rented Watchmen when it first came out while housesitting. To this day I don't know, but somehow their sound system played sound effects and music but no talking. Being slightly drunk and knowing this was more of an indie film style than mainstream superhero movie, I watched the entire first half of it that way.
Devil's Gate (2017)
What Happens in North Dakota, Stays in North Dakota
Other than teasing me with the appearance of Riker only to relegate him to the station of glorified cameo, I was pleasantly surprised.
Plot-wise, it isn't unique but it's different enough at first to have ya wondering exactly what genre of horror film this'll be. Fostering that not knowing is tough to pull off, so got points for it.
The acting isn't great, but there's more than a couple familiar faces. The kind you go, "Oh hey it's that guy from xyz show or movie" and that's it's own kind of... well actually not much of anything, but I'd probably enjoy this movie less if it weren't for them recognizables.
Effects stand out as the strongest point. Definitely in love with the mid-2010's theme of making all the colors some version of grayscale, but hey I lived through that and in small doses it ain't bad. And many times a scene would happen that I was expecting to be rough CGI work, only for it to turn out fairly decent to actually pretty good.
Overall I'd say 7.5 but since I can't give it that and I won't round up to an 8, 7 is fair. Give it a go one of those days you're looking for a movie you've never heard of that's entertaining. I mean, don't expect too much. There's a reason you probably never heard of it.
...then again we all heard about Prometheus.
And that was... well it was Prometheus.
Ahsoka: Part Three: Time to Fly (2023)
Part Three: Do A Barrel Roll
I thought Rosario Dawson did a great job as Ahsoka in The Mandalorian, so I'm going on record as saying the writing is what's not doin it for me.
The first third of the episode is a really drawn out and boring. A training schpiel that's trying to harken back to Luke and Ben on the Falcon but is not good.
The next third is slightly less drawn out, but also boring with a good hit of politics thrown in (both in-show and out-of-show) because that's what the people are here for, right?
The last third plays out like a level of Starfox with an intermission for potentially awesome space-Jedi stuff that landed flatter than the Marry Poppins bit of Last Jedi. Kept expecting a rabbit to start shouting things like "Use the boost to get through!" interspersed with the wailings of a vaguely amphibian sort of creature that I'm now remembering wearing a child's ball cap?
This show is not improving. Also so far all men are either evil, corrupt, or incompetent. Show me one that isn't, I say wait for the next episode.
Ahsoka: Part Two: Toil and Trouble (2023)
Part Two: Now That 'That's' Out of the Way
**Day of Release**
I put that notice there so when the reviews start to average out over time I'll get to see where I landed amongst the popular opinion. Anyhoo...
This episode was marginally better. At least there wasn't a three-twist puzzle cube that took the seasoned and wise titular character across the galaxy to solve. Weak sauce, Filoni.
One plus about this episode is that it closed up what I was expecting to be annoyingly drawn out, that being the mutually reluctant characters coming back to a master/apprentice relationship. As random and as bizarre that particular story arc smelled like it was going to stretch half the season.
Ahsoka: Part One: Master and Apprentice (2023)
Part One: Rebels What Now?
**Day of Release**
Early reviews are usually one of two things.
AMAZING!! Or HORRIBLE!!
This is neither, which is really disappointing. The AMAZING is self-explanatory, but at least with a hard enough bomb you stand the chance of a course correct. Picard, for instance.
You don't need to have watched Rebels. In fact you might like it better if you haven't, because the whole Sabine being trained as a Jedi thing is way outta nowhere. At least when Leia pulled her Marry Poppins in space routine, we got grounds for it with her being a Skywalker and all. But in the series, Sabine showed zero inclination towards Jedi-ary.
Maybe it'll improve. But this ain't a great start. Solid "meh" territory.
Murder on the Orient Express (2017)
Stands It Ground
I don't understand my own preferences well enough, let alone random internet people bothering to rate movies on IMDb. And I never read Agatha Christie, so not coming from this at "the book was better" angle.
What I can understand is how a steady diet of instant gratification and sensuality might lead someone to find this movie too slow and unsatisfying. The same folk might find Seven a good movie. I also find Seven to be a good movie, but this one was better.
Take away all the violence, the gore, the sex... without all the aforementioned sensuality, the story has to stand its own ground.
The actors, character development, plot, all of it landed very well. I'm giving it an 8, but honestly don't know what would've made it a 9 or 10.
Give it a go.
Rubikon (2022)
Took A Gamble & Lost
Referring to me. I kept seeing this on Hulu, didn't read the description and filed it under "Movies to Watch When Sick" I fill that file with movies that I know nothing about but for whatever reason (usually the promo poster) I am interested enough to possibly waste time on.
I thought Rubikon sounded like a sci-fi action, possibly horror flick. I cannot stress enough how wrong that was. Although for the first twenty minutes I was pretty cool with it. Ran along the setup for one of those kinds of things. But at thirty minutes I started suspecting no aliens were involved. Then I held out hope for a space psychological thriller at least, like someone goes mad and tries to... no. Just algae talk. So very, very much algae talk.
Ended my watch at an hour after it became apparent this was one of them foreboding-of-things-to-come-if-we-don't-environmentalism.
I liked the old guy. Graphics ain't bad. Feeling generous. Give em five.
The Astral Woods (2023)
Did ChatGPT Do This? Naw, That'd be Better.
There's really no existing genre of bad this falls into easily, more a kaleidoscope of reasons it sucks-not the least of which being how much they use a literal kaleidoscope lens.
The plot is actually promising on its own, clever enough to have not been done before. Kind of like an Unsolved Mysteries episode meets The Twilight Zone. But enacted by community theater people.
The whole cast, like all four people, just don't act well at all. I mean it's baaad. And the effects bounce between 2000's SciFi Channel Original to film school guy who found an app with filters he really liked; not ugly in themselves, but just a cluster of angles and hues they couldn't decide on so they used them all.
Most of the bottom tier of my ratings hinge on a few key things, but man this one just runs the gambit.
Jury Duty: The Verdict (2023)
A New Take, Well Delivered
Mockumentary is a hard thing to do right, and when I saw this was a show on 'Freevee' I was completely skeptical. But for whatever reason I gave it a shot and after the second episode I was engaged.
Trying to hide something as big as what amounts to a reality tv show is a task you'd be tempted to think is easier than it sounds. "It's so outrageous, no way anyone will think that's what's going on!" And the brilliance of it is, that's exactly how it's hidden. It's such a crazy idea that it doesn't even pass through your mind.
New schticks are hard to come by in entertainment, and what's tragic is when the concept lands but the delivery is shot. That is far from the case in Jury Duty.
The actors are remarkably talented at playing their roles consistently and believably. They might come off as a bit hammy, but when you consider how much was left off screen while still maintaining the illusion? I'd say even Mr. Marsden was impressed. His performance was the only one I thought was a big too overdone, but it's gotta be hard to be an actor playing a caricature of yourself. He's affable enough to let it slide.
Overall, very, very pleasantly surprised. I hope they renew this, as it has some serious staying power. New cases, new jurors, every season? Heck I might actually not try to wiggle out of jury duty next time, see if I get so lucky.
Star Trek: Picard (2020)
SEASON 3 SEASON 3 SEASON 3
Season 1: 7 - Season 2: 6 - Season 3: 10+
I can't adequately explain how absolutely incredible the third, and sadly last, season of Picard is.
Imagine all the hype and hope you had before you heard any of your favorite shows or movies were being rebooted, and let yourself dare to hope it could be that good.
Not just as a nerd's fantasy. It truly stands out as some of the best work of film produced in decades. The actors, the story, the production, everything was stellar.
The first two seasons stick out like sore thumbs in comparison-but if you are committed to a full watch through, I'd go through them first. Last thing you need is to have the flavor of the last season build up your hopes before unceremoniously dashing them with mediocrity. But if those were the price to pay to finally get it right, so be it.
There has never been a sweeter swan song writ for a cast of characters. I don't want to ruin a moment of it, so no spoilers. I only wish I could go back and watch it all for the first time all over again.
Thank you. Not just for not sucking, but for blowing every expectation out of the water.
Jury Duty (2023)
Best (and first) New Comedy in Years
Not since The Office aired have we seen genuine comedy, and what a comeback. Totally random, no big publicity, just a show written by smaller budgets and it may prove to be the special sauce.
No, it's not groundbreaking. Neither is it cast for recognition. It doesn't need to be. Comedy doesn't need to be. Comedy is supposed to be irreverent, and trying to make it a vessel for anything other than humor drowns it. Sometimes, rarely, you'll get a little something thrown in like a good story arc or aha moment of sorts-but those really only happen when they aren't aiming for it.
Today comedy shows are just so bad. There's a checklist of politics they go through and it makes the whole thing feel as cringey as a youth pastor trying to relate to teenagers through a song and dance routine.
This show could easily be a new hit. Why? Just watch it. Like most good comedy, you can't explain why it's funny. It just is. So go, enjoy. And stop giving any of your time to the terrible shows.
Star Trek: Picard: Seventeen Seconds (2023)
So, So, SO Much Better
Watching this season so far is like a reward for putting up with the last half decade of mediocre to downright awful seasons of the new Star Trek shows.
From getting rid of that long, gosh-awful opening segment to each episode, to writing characters that actually FEEL like Star Trek used to, I am floored.
My only complaint is that they didn't get it right sooner. The earlier seasons weren't really bad, but they were missed opportunities. I mean how do you involve Q and not make me happy? Even the Voyager Q made me happy.
Unfortunately it seems this will be a sweet swan song, as the last season of the series. But what a song it is. I just hope they don't drive it into the ground.
The Exorcism of God (2021)
Five Nights at Father Pete's
The people who like this movie I can imagine being those who are more hostile towards the idea of God. Could be wrong, but the 'twist' of a demonic person conducting a reverse exorcism to get God out of a priest is just... well perverse is technically an accurate word, but it's more silly than that. Like a bunch of people with zero insight into Christianity thought it'd be uniquely creepy, but it comes across like a Five Nights at Freddy's type of evil they're dealing with. I ain't expecting these things to be theologically sound, but the bit about a demon trying to possess Jesus in the desert is absolutely outlandish; as is the kid borne from the demonically possessed priest r*ping a woman he only just recently exorcised randomly AF being "the chosen one" at the end.
If you don't find that kind of thing jarringly dumb, yeah you might enjoy it better, but it still ain't gonna be a good time. Very long feeling, jumbled characters, and a near William Shatner level style of acting from the main dude. Just not good. Not good at all.
Prey for the Devil (2022)
Ahead of its Peers
Very close to an 8, but I can't put it on the same level as The Exorcism of Emily Rose, which I find to be by far the best supernatural horror film out there. Still, for a long time I never thought a movie would come close.
My first interest in these exorcism flicks is to see how they handle the actual evil at hand. The good ones make it realistic enough without crossing the line into what I'd call flamboyant territory. This is a good example of that.. although it does have a few things that are the slightest bit ridiculous. For the most part it stays intelligent enough to make you think about the diabolical's motives and is consistent with its character.
The acting is really pretty good. Some side characters are like cardboard cutouts, but the protagonist and other main characters feel lifelike. I especially think the main Father character is well done.
Perhaps my favorite part, however, is how they approach the very real controversy behind the role of women in the Catholic church. There are the odd lines of dialogue that sound like caricatures of patriarchal ideas, but they are few. The theme is very much about the issue, but it isn't pandering or overzealous. The lead, Ann, is a flawed person-something too often overlooked in favor of 'I am woman hear me roar!' or such absurdities as a lady that weighs a buck-ten beating the tar out of a hulk of an enemy. No, she has her thoughts on the matter, but her entire being isn't defined by it. Very nice to see.
Finally, story wise it's a bit 'meh' but it did keep a twist for about half the movie for me. And it isn't just a mish-mash of old hat content. The end does leave it open to sequels, but I really hope they don't go that route.
If I could give it a 7.5 I would, but this is one of those cases where I'll have to round down.
Come True (2020)
It's Never Lupus
Rare territory this lands in-I actually thought it was going to be good for the first bit. Then it got more artsy fartsy, but there was still hope. Then... let's say it hit some gravel that turned to rocks.
There's nothing I hate more than a good beginning and terrible end. I give it some points for cinematography, which is truly amazing at times.
But if you're looking for:
- Unresolved story arcs
- Character choices that make no sense
- Excessively drawn out sequences
- Oh, and sex involving a minor
It's ok. But also, it's not. Because you know what? It's all a coma actually so none of it happened and now the chick is a vampire in coma land and you wonder why you wasted part of your only day off this week.
Horror in the High Desert 2: Minerva (2023)
You'll Want (And Can Probably Expect) More
The first movie I watched just because I saw the close to 8 rating on this one and my OCD would kill me if I started a series with a sequel. Except that business with Star Wars. But that, that doesn't count.
I'm very glad I did. This isn't a spectacular horror movie, but then what even is? Worth asking. For me, the best horror is able to bring the scares without relying on kitsch like jump scares. And it isn't gratuitous with the violence, while not being afraid to use it either. But perhaps most importantly, it's gotta tell a good story. And the story established in both films is vague enough to be menacing, while pointed enough to establish itself as doing something new-while not even being very new.
HHD (someone's gotta coin the shorthand title after all) is a series that, so far, has taken the found footage and documentary narrative styles and performed them together in a remarkably smooth way. Seriously, as it starts you think, "Ah this is gonna get old." But by about midway, I found myself wondering, "Well if there was something like this in real life, wouldn't this be how it'd be delivered?" Don't get me wrong, it's not unique. But it's pulled off without it being clunky and dumb, which in this genre is itself unique enough.
What's more, often the independent productions either go too far into graphics and effects, which fail to make up for the hollowness of the rest and with they can ill afford anyways, resulting in a weird piece of uncanny valley with bad dialogue, or they sacrifice so much at the artsy fartsy altar that watching it feels like a Halloween TEDTalk by Philip Seymour Hoffman. I'd say not in a good way, but I don't think there is a good way.
In short, these folks have done a great job at just making a solid entry into a sorely unappreciated genre. And I look forward to the next entry, which is all but guaranteed following this second chapter.
Please, really please, don't sell out.
Horror in the High Desert (2021)
Paranormal Investigation: Nevada Wilderness Edition
As campy and low budget as it is, they do a good job of paying homage to what many of us used to hope for when we were young, back in the early days of paranormal reality shows. It's hard to imagine, but for a few short moments before it all became variations of the same recycled formula, you could almost let yourself get invested when the narrator said something "truly unexplained and terrifying" was about to happen. At least if you were twelve and one of the kids the school bus dropped off early and happened to catch the tail end of daytime television.
Honestly I wouldn't have picked this up out of a line up. But I find that a score of 6.5-7 on Imdb is usually enough to get my interest in a horror movie, and while this clearly isn't, it's sequel is a surprising 7.8 which is solid B+ territory.
It's better than those shows and short enough to enjoy if you got nothing better to do. Definitely good enough for me to watch the higher-rated sequel.
...to be continued on that page.
Something in the Dirt (2022)
Where Did It Come From, Where Did It Go
I can't say that it's a great movie, but I can say that it has enough going for it that it held my attention all the way through. The acting, effects, even the narrative (though I use that term lightly) is all well above many other movies that I've scored similarly; but as in life, sometimes your greatest strengths are your greatest weaknesses.
At times it felt like the movie couldn't decide on what genre it was going for. Horror? Sci-fi? Comedy? The actors shined at various times through the movie. You can really tell when they entered that sweet spot, but then the whole thing takes another turn. Like "Oh so this guy has a messed up pass, could be a sexual predator" turns into "Haha funny beach bum guy doesn't know what's going on."
When taken piece meal, the effects are good. It's honestly a great time in history for judgmental people like me who can't see past bad CGI. But they're thrown in haphazardly, and kinda act like weird chunks of vegetables in an otherwise passable bowl of chili.
And the narrative... well I think they just took themselves too seriously. Almost like they wanted to do 'Close Encounters of the Third Kind' meets 'Synecdoche New York'. By the end, it's apparent that they've modeled their film after the plot. There's threads that lead to more threads and roads to more roads and is this when it's real or is this the documentary? Like, okay. I get it. You got me confused like the characters are confused. Why does it matter?
Anyway, I wouldn't recommend this if you're in the mood for horror or sci-fi, or comedy for that matter. But if you watched 'Joker' and enjoyed watching someone gradually go crazy, this is up that alley. Nowhere near as good, but there ya go.
La llorona (2019)
Less Spooky, More Downton Abbey
Credit where it's due, I don't think I've ever seen a 'horror' movie without an attempted jump scare and that deserves kudos. Character development was also on point; all of the actors were all particularly talented, and I could see any given one of their characters playing a titular role in a film of their own.
Unfortunately, its greatest strength is also its greatest weakness-this is especially true on a number of occasions when you're expecting the spooky factor to hit a crescendo, but instead it simmers back down drastically to the soap opera routine.
If you were looking for a Guatemalan Downton Abbey what dabbles with some war crimes, you'll be happy. What paranormal activity there is will probably just add a bit of seasoning to the whole thing.
If, however, you're looking for a less terrible take on the La Llorona mythos than what that one that was meant to build further into The Conjuring universe, this ain't for you.
Imawa no Kuni no Arisu (2020)
Came for Squid Game, Got Lost
I'll admit it. I saw this title after Squid Game, and having thoroughly enjoyed that series, I was interested. But two shows of childhood games where the stakes are life and death in a Netflix season was a bit much, so I put it on the back burner-you know, the kind of show you leave enough time to forget about it and then remember wanting to get around to it. Plan went off without a hitch and I caught the first season as Netflix was advertising the second before it aired.
It took me a while to get through the first few episodes, but it built up pretty quick to binge territory after that.
Most episodes are enough to carry themselves without leaning on the "big secret" that so many shows make a distraction out of teasing. Yes, we all know nobody knows. Wonderful. Where this succeeds is in making each character interesting enough to actually care where they end up. Not talking highbrow, artsy statement stuff; just entertaining. And the games, well yeah. Entertaining! Sometimes interspersed with too much angst and melodrama, but overall I genuinely would think about how I would play it out if I were in those shoes.
The first season started a bit rough for me, but ended amazingly. The second season pulled a U-y on that, ending on a note that made me feel like JJ Abrams somehow got involved and the studio decided to cancel the whole thing before it got drawn out like the other purgatory metaphors he's spun.
I would've given this a 7.5, and any time I end up in .5 territory, I usually feel an inkling one way or the other. The last shot is what tipped this from being a runner-up 7 to a solid 8.
After the big reveal, and the whole thing has been revealed as a mass shared near-death experience hallucination with various plot holes, the camera pans to a scattered deck of cards on a table. As the number cards and face cards get blown away by a brush of wind, we zoom in and close on the joker. And I'm sorry if it was a serious moment or something, but it felt like them saying "Hahaha that was the payoff ya shmo" and that made me larf.
V/H/S/99 (2022)
Black Mirror P*rn Parody w/o the P*rn
This is what happens when you didn't like your high school years in the early aught-thousands so you pretend you grew up in the nineties so automatically anything you make about it is authentic because you were there, so if people don't like it it's because they're dumb... except you didn't actually grow up in the nineties. You were alive. But any culturally relevant experience you have is limited to Nickelodeon and what Happy Meal toys came out.
Either that or someone got drunk and binged old seasons of MTV's True Life for a weekend.
But seriously, this movie is gosh awful. I only gave it a point above V/H/S '94 because it didn't try forcing a clunky narrative in to pull them all together.
The effects are bad, but not bad enough to be funny.
The characters are bad, but not bad enough to be satire.
The stories are bad... that's it for that one. Just bad.
And to top it all off we got a heaping portion of what I'm really hoping Shudder catches onto as being a festering boil on the franchise in the last two entries in social commentary. Because where would we be if we allowed forays into mindless horror without taking the opportunity to remind everyone that the real life horror that happens is because of the elitist white patriarchy maaaaan.
Noroi (2005)
Properly Good Horror
Most found-footage movies lean on it like a load bearing column, while Noroi makes it feel like the most organic way to tell the story.
I don't know I would classify this as horror, strictly speaking. There's not a lot that rightly scared me, but they didn't push for it. Instead they go for that sliver between spooky and scary, and they score.
Enough realism to keep it grounded, but not too much so that the outlandish sticks out like a sore thumb.
Acting is... good? Honestly, I'm not a Japanophile so I couldn't tell you. But from a Western standpoint, nobody was bad and a few were actually pretty decent.
Story is a little winding. And while in theory all of it tracts by the end, there's still odds and ends that are kind of random. But it could be by design-who says every character involved needs to have a definite arc?
Overall great way to spend an afternoon off.