isaackiernan Reviews

Ganja & Hess (1973)

A Work Of Art

[10/10 · 6 November 2021]

"Victim but also murderer" muses George Meda (director Bill Gunn), in an early scene. This scene stuck with me throughout the rest of the film, which plays out in an ethereal dream-like manner, Director Gunn has crafted a hallucinatory brooding masterpiece, and as the end credits rolled I couldn't believe that people don't talk about this film more often than they do. This is an example of a film that truly feels like one person's singular vision onscreen, and it was truly a thought provoking and unique viewing experience. I can honestly say that I dont think I've ever seen a film quite like this one, and it remains criminally under seen.

Meet the Parents (1992)

Excellent dark comedy marred by toothless remake

[8/10 · 31 July 2020]

Extremely happy that I finally got to see this. The humor in this film is, amongst other things, unbelievably funny, twisted, dark, and is the ultimate 'worst case' scenario. The film starts out with some cringe inducing awkwardness on par with some of the interactions on BBC's The Office, which quickly unfolds as coincidence after coincidence turn greg's in-laws to be, and eventually his fiancee herself, against him. Superficially the Hollywoodized remake preserves the basic plot idea, but gone is the relatability- Glienna as Greg is an everyman, and he not once tries to deceive, gone is the bite, Fay's final scene would be unheard of in a major Hollywood comedy, I believe, and most importantly gone is the character. This is a very unique film that I would put on par with Paul Bartel's Eating Raoul or Scenes From The Class Struggle in Beverly Hills. Also Emo Philips rules. Highly recommended.

Uncut Gems (2019)

Mr. Sandler's Opus

[10/10 · 19 April 2020]

Not a huge fan of Sandler on the whole, the last few films he's made has certainly not helped him either. But this is a whole other level of filmmaking, completely alien to his usual schtick. Howard is a real person, the character lives and breaths, every character does in fact. Have not been this heavily invested in what is happening in a film in a long time. Highly recommend going in completely blind with no plot details spoiled, so I'm not going to say a thing. What an actual transformation for a role.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

Garbage

[2/10 · 24 August 2019]

Truly terrible remake of the great "Texas Chainsaw Massacre". The only character who works is the Sheriff, though not because of the writing, purely from Ermey's performance alone. The New Leatherface is awful, the new protagonists are awful, the new house is awful. The original film is scary from its sheer realism and enigmatic villains. This film is so slick and overproduced, underwritten, and just disgusting. The massive amounts of gore is not scary. It's not, it's just gross. Gore can be fun when executed properly, but this is just not. It's a blood soaked exercise in human misery and one of the worst remakes I've seen. If you want a good Massacre film I highly recommend the original 1974 film, it's amazing 1986 sequel, the oft maligned but still entertaining TCM 3, and the so-bad-it's-hilarious TCM The next Generation. But stear clear of this film and it's prequel.

The Alligator People (1959)

"Radioactive Alligator Men and the Women Who Love Them!"

[7/10 · 24 August 2019]

Great classic stuff here. Woman's husband Paul goes missing on their wedding night, she follows the clues to his family plantation where she meets a crabby old lady who seems to know more than she lets on and a drunken hook handed maniac played gleefully by Lon Chaney Jr.! It seems a Gator's bit off poor Chaney's hand and he's decided to slay every single one of the beasts, including the rather large new one who showed up mysteriously following Paul's disappearance...

Remarkably better film that the title would have you believe, but I can't think of a better one, "I walked with an Alligator" maybe? Holds its own with other sci-fi thrillers of the day such as Frankenstein 1970, and The Fly. Incidentally Marvel seems to have ripped this film off wholesale for their character "The Lizard". Recommended.

Hair (1979)

Beautiful movie with an ending that hits like a punch to the gut

[10/10 · 17 July 2019]

Fantastic film about youth in America during the late 60's Hippie scene. The Vietnam conflict is front and center, with draft dodging becoming one of its central themes. I won't spoil the ending, but the first time I saw the film it did indeed make me cry. Williams absolutely steals the show as Berger, and this might be my favorite film he's ever done. The music is great, even improving on some of the renditions on the broadway soundtrack - Electric Blues is phenomenal, as is Walking in Space and the showstopping "Flesh Failures/Let the Sunshine In". I actually vastly prefer the movie's plotting and characterization to the stage version, it feels more real, more grounded. The film's version of "Easy to be hard" is heartbreaking, almost as much as the film's final moments. This is a snapshot in time, a view into the harsh reality of life, love, and loss during one of America's most controversial conflicts. Highly recommended.

The Baby (1973)

As sick as they come

[8/10 · 6 July 2019]

Unbelievably demented 70's psycho drama from Director Ted Post. Ann wants to save baby from his family by any means necessary. To give any more away is a disservice to the film, full of shocks and thrills, twists and turns, and an ending you'll never see coming. The first hour is demented, the last 24 minutes are downright twisted. Trashy as hell but highly engaging. Highly recommended to fans of classics like "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?" and trashy fare like Bert I. Gordon's "Mad Bomber". Great time to be had by all, The Baby is unforgettable sleaze at its very finest.

My Soul to Take (2010)

Interesting Failure

[7/10 · 30 June 2019]

'My Soul To Take' is a very odd film that was done no service by an early test screening. The film has been muddled by reshoots and rewrites, leading to oddly clashing tones at times. The film provides a wealth of ideas, none of them wholly original, and plays out like a weird Frankenstein of Nightmare on Elm Street, Village of the Damned, and Scream. Thankfully it appears that most of the original cut footage is on the dvd release as special features. While these scenes do help elaborate on some of the stranger scenes in the film, let's be honest this was never going to be a masterpiece. So why do I enjoy it? There's something at play here, something just under the surface that kept me involved all the way through, involved enough to check out some of the production issues and watch all of the deleted and alternate footage. I should note that the deleted footage, while not wholly 'great' would help the film significantly in maintaining its tone, and including the first alternate ending , this tone gels much more with the end credit sequence that remains in the final cut than the ending it was actually released with. Whatever its faults the movie never had me bored but at the same time left me mildly frustrated. There is an imagination at work here, although derivative, and it could sorely due with a director's cut, although as Craven is no longer with us, this is sadly not possible. Recommended.

The Car: Road to Revenge (2019)

Not The Worst

[6/10 · 18 January 2019]

This isn't a very good movie, but it's not unwatchable. Almost completely unrelated to the original 1977 film (which I am a huge fan of), but the car does resemble the original car by the end. This movie takes the similar approach of what if, but different? The original film was "What if Jaws, but it was a car", this is "What if The Crow, but he's a car". The cyberpunk sci-fi future is a weird touch, and I must ask, why do so many bad sequels go sci fi with non sci fi source material? Seriously, Highlander 2, Jason X, Leprechaun 4, Hellraiser 4, it's a very strange trend. Anyway, I enjoyed this enough. For what it is, it's a decent time waster and has some nice gore effects. Recommended for lazy Sunday afternoons when nothing is on TV. Incidentally does anyone know what make and model the car used in this movie is? I swear it looks like a modified Chrysler 300, but I'm not sure.

Ghost in the Shell (2017)

Ghost Remixed

[7/10 · 3 April 2017]

This film is not a straight adaptation of the 1995 anime film "Ghost in the shell". What it is.... is a cinematic love letter to the franchise as a whole. It uses the basic plot structure of the 95 film, but introduces elements and plot threads from the series "stand alone complex" as well as story elements from "Ghost in the shell 2: Innocence". It plays out as a 'best of' kind of film, and I sure loved it. Johanssen is pretty decent in the role, but who really shines are Pilou Asbaek as Batou, and Takeshi Kitano as Aramaki. The filmmakers really nailed the world,the atmosphere, and the characters. My only real complaint is that I wished Togusa had some more screen time, especially since when he was on screen he was perfect, but I was extremely satisfied with the film as a whole.

Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)

Uneven

[6/10 · 18 May 2015]

First off I need to clarify: I did like the film overall. That being said it is very uneven. Aall of the scenes related to the 'main' plot involving Ultron, Strucker, The Maximoffs etc. were fine, no problem there. The problems arrive in the completely unnecessary and very tacked on sub-plots. A subplot involving a very poorly written romance between Hulk and Black widow that feels like it was written by a completely different author than the rest of the movie, and a bizarre subplot about Hawkeye not being there for his family and constantly alluding to remodeling his house? I'm sorry I just don't understand why either of these subplots were included except maybe to pad out the running time, or because people complained about Black Widow's and Hawkeye's seeming "unimportance" in the first film. So overall a good flick, but the uneven nature prevents me from truly recommending it.

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

What a lovely day!

[10/10 · 18 May 2015]

Mad Max 4ury road is one heck of a movie. While not as good as "Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior" this film manages to breath new life into the Max Mythos, and has me very excited for any future sequels. Enjoyed this one thoroughly. Tom "For You" Hardy Kills it as Max, and Theron is a total unrepentant BadA**. This is what action movies are all about. God, it's so cool. it's just....a really cool movie. I can't stress that enough. The main plot involves Max teaming up with Theron's Furiosa, begrudgingly at first, but slowly gaining each other's trust, to steal a Warlord's prized collection of wives, and deliver them to safety. The simplicity of the plot allows for some beautifully well crafted action sequences, set against an intensely colorful and gorgeous background. This is just a well made, well acted, well written, and downright entertaining addition to the Mad Max Saga. It's a ten from me.

The Interview (II) (2014)

Korean Barbecue

[8/10 · 25 December 2014]

Was mildly interested with teasers and trailers, and severely disappointed when it was announced as a "cancelled" film. was thrilled when it was released VOD. Is it the best film ever? No. It's the standard Rogen/Franco fare with some pretty decent jokes and an entertainingly over the top climax. The highlight of the film (for Me) was Randall Park's performance as Kim Jong Un. Park plays him as a wildly unpredictable basket-case who is so used to getting what he wants that the second things go sour he plans to instigate Armageddon. Park's scenes easily steal the show, and he comes off as funny, intimidating, crazy, and scary all at once. all in all, a very very funny movie, with some great foreshadowing in the first act and a finale that left me howling.

Need for Speed (2014)

Incomprehensible Mess

[3/10 · 16 March 2014]

I....really wanted to like this. When I first heard about a NFS movie I was like....you mean that game where it's all cars and no characters? and it's just racing? But then I heard Aaron "Jesse Pinkman" Paul was signed on to star and I got pumped. I was hyped after the first trailer. What I thought the movie would be- based on early promotional material - was a brutal revenge flick with lots of speed and action. In my head I envisioned a cast of crazy characters all racing cross country in some form of "Wacky Races" scenario. I thought of bizarre homemade cars with machine guns in the headlights and knives in the hubcaps. Well I went to see it last night. Paid for two tickets. $21.00. well.... This is the second movie I ever saw where I genuinely wanted my ticket fare back. The first forty minutes or so were completely 100% pointless. The dialogue was just awful, some of the worst I've ever heard. Paul's performance is so bland he blends into the background. I've never seen him so subdued. He's such an energetic actor, even in smaller roles! There is no clear date and time associated with the story. It seems to be modern day, until some form of holographic teleportation device shows up, as well as holographic speedometer displays-- leading one to believe this is some form of sci-fi future? Also this movie is full of scenes that lead nowhere, conversations that mean nothing, and motivations that are unrealistic at best. The movie's biggest sin is it's inconsistency. It has moments that almost work, and in any other movie would, but because of all of the problems the truly decent moments just don't make it worth watching. This film should've clocked in at about 85 minutes. at 130 minutes it is a chore to watch, and the cringe inducing "comedic relief" characters are grating and outstay their welcome. The only decent performance in the film is Michael Keaton playing THE MONARCH!!!! (Where was Dr. Mrs.?) He is basically playing Betelguese if he was a radio DJ, and provides some of the few enjoyable scenes in this rotten flick. Aaron, I love you buddy, but you should've passed on this turkey. 3 ricin cigs out of 10.

Enter the Void (2009)

More than a film.

[8/10 · 11 February 2014]

Enter the void is a unique experience, truly a work of art. The film captures the experience of dying and the aftermath, in some shockingly beautiful and intensely disturbing imagery. The film also has an isolationist tone, making the audience truly feel alone in the universe as events unfold around them. The main character is not really a character; he is an audience surrogate in the purest sense. The audience sees everything from his point of view, experiences his entire life as it flashes on the screen. While I know several people who hate this movie, I just don't see anything to hate. I didn't just watch this film, I felt this film. and that's something that a lot of modern films can't make me do.

Cheech & Chong's Animated Movie (2013)

A Great idea for a film....

[6/10 · 10 May 2013]

....with somewhat disappointing execution. I was really looking forward to this, being a fan of the many "Cheech & Chong" comedy albums, and was excited to see/hear such classics as "Dave's Not Here" and "Sister Mary Elephant". This is a difficult movie to review because while it is extremely funny....it's not very well made. at all. The various bits from the comedy albums are just as funny now as the first time you've heard them, but they don't really flow together in any form of a cohesive narrative. Also the animation is extremely lacking. I expected better, but don't let the negative attributes steer you away, there is still a lot to enjoy here, just not as much as I was (personally) hoping for. 6/10 - average.

Logan's Run (1976)

"It begins where your imagination ends"

[10/10 · 2 January 2013]

These words from the theatrical trailer sum up the entire film. "Logan's Run" is a very unique little film, with some clever ideas, imaginative technology, and excellent writing.

The year is 2274, and Logan 5 is a Sandman. The sandmen are a futuristic police force specializing in tracking down "Runners". What is a runner? Well in this society every life must end at 30, unless renewed at the festival of Carousel. Runners are those who attempt to flee society when their time is up. So, you can imagine the problems presented when a sandman, Logan 5, is forced to run himself. Tracked by his former partner, Francis 7, and accompanied by a woman who loves him, Jessica 6, Logan 5 must do all that is in his power to reach Sanctuary.

That is where I must end my plot synopsis for anything more would be spoilers, and this is such a good movie I just couldn't bear to spoil it for anyone that hasn't seen it. All I can say is that this is a truly remarkable film, and if you're debating whether or not to see it I suggest that you see it.

Silent Hill: Revelation (2012)

A Laugh Riot......

[3/10 · 28 October 2012]

...But I don't believe it was intended to be. I was looking forward to Silent Hill Revalations for a very long time, and was very excited to see it. I'm a huge Silent Hill fan, and I am one of the few people that actually liked the first SH movie. That being said, this movie is....bad. It's just really really bad. In fact I had a great time watching it, it's so bad, It's hilarious! The writing is so laughable, that the poor delivery only made it funnier. So, I am very glad I saw it, heck I'll probably buy it when it comes out on DVD for a quick laugh now and again, but as a horror movie this fails on ALL fronts. Poor Malcolm McDowell. So If you're looking to be scared....watch the first one. If you're looking for a good laugh, this is the movie for you.

Mockingbird Lane (2012 TV Movie)

absoLUTEly brilliant

[10/10 · 27 October 2012]

As a long time fan of "The Munsters" I was both excited, and apprehensive when I heard about this reboot. A New Munsters? I groaned, remembering such fare as the 80's made for TV flick "The Munsters' Revenge" but then I heard It's not a comedy, it's a drama. and I thought....huh....there's potential there. So I watched it, and it was extremely well done. Everything from the writing to the special effects was top notch. I was extremely happy to see Portia DiRossi, who starred in my favorite show of all time, "Arrested Development". O'Connell shined as the kind-hearted Herman, and Izzard's Grandpa is imposing, threatening, frightening, and just a tad hilarious. I love this new take on "The Munsters" and I hope it takes off, I would love to watch this weekly. Future remake makers, take notes from this pilot. It's excellent.

Total Recall (I) (2012)

Not Bad.

[7/10 · 7 August 2012]

While not quite as good as the Schwarzenegger version, this is still a pretty good movie. I found it flawed, but quite enjoyable.

Colin Farrell plays everyman Quaid, a Colony worker who discovers there may be more to his life than he previously thought.

Now while I enjoyed the movie I did have a few problems. the first "I give good wife" I'm sure this made sense to someone behind the camera, but I have never heard this expression before in my life. maybe this is edited down from "I give good head" or something else like that, but as it is the line makes no sense.

Still, I found it to be quite enjoyable and I think it deserves to be watched.

Cars 2 (2011)

This is it, folks. It just doesn't get much worse.

[1/10 · 19 July 2012]

"Cars 2" is an abomination of cinema. which is a real shame, because I rather enjoyed the first "Cars". But this? Oh How Pixar has fallen. How many great movies have they made? We have all three "Toy Story" movies, "The Incredibles", "Finding Nemo", heck, I even enjoyed "Monsters Inc.", but "Cars 2" is the lowest of the low. Now, what makes this movie so bad? Many, many things, but let's start with the premise. Remember the first movie? A charming, if odd, tale about a fish out of water, a race car from the big city stuck in a small town along Route 66. Where is he in this film? relegated to side character while Mater (one of my least favorite aspects about the original "Cars") takes center stage. To top it off we've now introduced spies into this movie series. Why? why did we need spies? and let's not forget the AWFUL puns. "Tow-kyo"? "HARDY HAR IT"S LIKE TOKYO. BUT CAR RELATED." BIG BENTLEY GET IT? I'm sorry, maybe I'm not the target audience for this film, and maybe I'm just a big stick in the mud, but I fail to see how anyone, even a child could enjoy this miserable train wreck of a film. I had high hopes for Pixar's latest film "Brave". I've yet to see it, but after seeing "Cars 2" I'm not even sure if I want to.

Arrested Development (2003–2019)

The Greatest Show of All Time?

[10/10 · 19 July 2012]

Quite Possibly. It's definitely my Personal favorite, and I am not "S-ing" around here. I have seen every episode time and time again, and continue to catch background gags I missed. So what makes "Arrested Development" so great? Is it the Writing? Definitely, it has phenomenal writing. Is it the cast? Most definitely, every single cast member fits their role perfectly. Is it the fact that everything about this show comes together so perfectly that every last minute of every last episode is completely unforgettable? in a word: yes. The combination of an extremely talented cast, extremely funny writing, and perfect execution makes this series a must see. As J. Walter Weatherman would say: "AND THAT'S WHY YOU SHOULD WATCH ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT."

Turok: Son of Stone (2008 Video)

Everyone's favorite dinosaur hunter is back!

[9/10 · 28 June 2012]

Now, For those unfamiliar with the Turok franchise, Turok was a comic book series created in the mid fifties, that in the nineties got a major re-vamp when it became one of the best selling games of all time. "Turok: Dinosaur Hunter" was one of the first games I ever played as a child, and I have many fond memories of staying up late, and killing dinosaurs with my father. So naturally when I was walking through a local discount shop I was quite surprised to see "Turok: Son of Stone" on the DVD shelf. A movie of one of my favorite games as a kid? When did this come out? the $3.00 price tag made it a must buy, and when i got home that night I popped it in the DVD player and gave it a watch.

After many years in exile, Turok returns to his tribe to find that they have been mercilessly slaughtered by the maniacal Chichak. Chichak chases Turok, his nephew, Andar, and his sister in law, into the fabled Lost Lands where Dinosaurs are still very much alive.

And Needless to say, this movie was everything I hoped it would be. It is great fun, Great violence, and a great time all around. You get to see Turok slaughtering Dinosaurs, The Lost lands look perfect, and you can tell a lot of effort went into making this. It's not a perfect movie, but as a Turok movie it's as perfect as it could ever be.

Phelous & the Movies (2008– )

Fantastic series

[10/10 · 22 June 2012]

Phelous is a very very good show, and full of my kind of humor. One reason I love it is because Phelous reminds me very much of myself. and its great to see someone with my sense of humor actually making something worthwhile.

Phelous (Portrayed brilliantly by Phelan Porteous) is a seemingly immortal man who constantly inflicts upon himself terrible movie after terrible movie. He's died countless times, and even come back as side characters such as the bizarre Selouph, a reverse Phelous who's life's goal is to take over Phelous' show and turn it into a romantic comedy review show. There are also characters such as Phelous D1 (who's motives are never quite clear) and the occasional cameo from a Mortal Kombat Character.

Phelous is perhaps my favorite contributor to the "thatguywiththeglasses" team. He's funny, Very dry (and I do love me some dry humor), and a heck of a lot of fun. If you haven't seen it, I say check it out.