The very beginning got me excited that this was going to be as creepy and scary as I anticipated from watching the trailer...I was So very wrong.
There were Way too many sub-plots in this movie that I couldn't figure out which one I cared about least...but definitely gave me ideas on who I wanted to be killed first.
The acting was just terrible, from the attempted pot smoking from actors who'd obviously never touched a bowl in their entire lives, overly dramatic arguments that made me think everyone involved needed to be diagnosed bi-polar and put on medication immediately, to the unrealistic death scenes where the "last twitches" seemed to never end. The characters were unlikeable other than perhaps the two brothers and the cinematography was confusing at best, as they tended to favour long, uncomfortable pauses on insignificant objects for no apparent logical reason.
So, let's get started on the plot(s). Loads of Spoilers!!!
The initial scene is of a women washing up some dishes when she hears a loud bang in her house. She goes to the living room, where I spent too much time wondering why there were two fireplaces, decided nothing is amiss and goes back to the sink. After another louder bang she goes to investigate and apparently gets over killed...I say apparently because we don't actually get to see anything, only get to hear some "killing noises" that we assume she is dead, and I will point out that this lady is of Absolutely No importance to the movie...I wish I knew that before I spent Way too much of the first quarter of the movie trying to tie her into the plot somehow.
There are three couples spending the night at a house belonging to one of the guys parents, apparently to have some fun before they graduate college and go their separate ways. The guy has a brother who is also staying there and just got out of prison two weeks before. There is obvious animosity between the brothers because the one never went to visit the other in jail. We find out later that it's because the one brother went to jail to protect the other brother...what I Really want to know is, how could Anyone get sentenced to three years in prison for Attempting to steal a car?? I've seen murderers serve less time!!
Ok, back to the story(s)...they all have dinner, get high, drink some wine, and during this time we find out that one girl thinks she's pregnant and doesn't know who the baby daddy is, the potential father is having a screaming match on his phone with his coach about getting him scouted to some sports team (I think), nobody trusts the ex-con brother and apparently not even One of the seven people in this house carries their cell phone On them, or all seven of them had to simultaneously charge their phones in different rooms...I'm still not sure but I'm calling BS.
Apparently during all of this nonsense, someone sneaks in this huge house, that is of course in the middle of no where, takes all their cell phones without them hearing and kidnaps one of the annoying girls who is for no reason crying in the upstairs bathroom. Another guy, who I don't care about, goes outside to look for his gfs phone, notices the cars are all messed up and gets killed on the way back. So now there are five people left...big "knock" on the door and GF of guy I don't care about, goes to check on her man, finds him dead on the porch, goes to cry soundlessly over his dead body and gets whacked by a baseball bat to the head a couple times. I gotta admit, at this point I had high hopes of this movie Finally picking up some speed!... I was mistaken again.
The remaining four people got to see the girl get whacked and after a battle to get the door shut the antagonist finally shows his face and he is a creepy clown with a big pot belly. He wants them to let him in, they thought this wasn't a good idea and the clown somehow shuts off the lights in this whole house. Lucky that the ex-con has some brains and grabs a knife and lights the way with his zippo.
Apparently the absentee parents took the guns away from the house two weeks earlier in preparation for their jailbird son to come home because they didn't want guns around a guy who once attempted to steal a car, because...reasons.
Lights turn back on to show younger brothers gf, the girl they kidnapped earlier from the bathroom, to be tied up out back with now two crazy clowns being asked to be let in or she gets killed. Now this is where things get really ridiculous. The clown is shown putting a pool ball up to the gfs mouth...I'm thinking he's gonna probably use it to smash her teeth in or something along those lines, but no...we hear some crunching noises (because we don't get to see pretty much anything in this film), and then all of a sudden the pool ball is bulging out of the girls neck! They made this girl look like a pelican when it has a fish stuck in its throat. The probability of him accomplishing this task without the use of surgical instruments is slim to none. This death scene is the funniest thing I've seen in a while. Her attempts at looking like she was choking were hilarious and her last death twitches seemed to go on forever! I didn't think this girl was Ever gonna die!
Next up, just like in Scooby-doo, the gang splits up, seemingly because the plot needed to move along, and the jock and ex-con decide to check upstairs. They go into a room, equipped with the cons knife and trusty zippo and another clown comes out of no where and kills the jock. The two people left downstairs, the little brother and the girl who may or may not be pregnant, run upstairs and find the ex-con still alive, the jock dead and mysteriously the clown has vanished? I really haven't a clue what happened because the zippo went out.
Side note: I'm pretty sure the brothers Just moved into this house because they don't have a clue where anything is, including the fuse box. And where exactly Is the fuse box?? The clowns are turning the lights on and off with ease. It's either outside where no fuse box is ever located or the inside, vanishing clown guy is flicking the switches, and if that's the case, why doesn't That guy just let the other clowns in?! So many questions....
The three remaining characters decide to make a run for it out the back door. (First semi-smart move they have made in this entire movie) Ex-con gets taken down by a clown in a dress but tells the others to keep running. While Ex-con grapples with that guy, baby bro gets sucker punched with a bat by the original pot bellied clown who then starts choking him out. Pregnant/not pregnant girl starts running down the road only to come across six more clowns holding various weapons who proceed to surround her and kill her...we again don't get to see the kill but they did add in a shot of her mangled body and a couple of those twitches the director thinks is crucial to a good death scene. Ex-con stabs dress clown in the throat and then uses OG clowns bat against him, kills him and gets him off his baby bro. The brothers rush into the garage where the four wheeler the Con was working on earlier (and that was running perfectly fine earlier) was kept, but of course it won't start.
The boys arm themselves ready for battle because they somehow know there are lots of other clowns out there and that's it. Literally... that's it. The end is the worst part of this film because it doesn't exist.
Some other points: what are eight psychopathic clowns doing in the middle of the woods and how did they get there?!? Did they stop to apply the clown make-up right before heading out or do they always run around looking like that? Did they scope out this place beforehand to know the inhabitants weren't armed? That there was no alarm system? That there was no landline? Did they do any Real reconnaissance on the house other than hiding in the bushes that day and breathing really hard?
It seems a pretty far way to walk when there are so many potential variables that could screw up their massacre.
What happened to the clown upstairs??
If they wanted inside So badly, why didn't they just Remain inside while they were taking everyone's cell phones or kidnapping the gf??
What was the significance of the pregnant/not pregnant girl? Who would bring two pregnancy tests to a house party? Why was it important that she didn't know who the father was when there was never a confrontation between her and her bf about the subject?
What happened in the end?!?!
This film had potential, but it missed the mark on so many levels.
There were Way too many sub-plots in this movie that I couldn't figure out which one I cared about least...but definitely gave me ideas on who I wanted to be killed first.
The acting was just terrible, from the attempted pot smoking from actors who'd obviously never touched a bowl in their entire lives, overly dramatic arguments that made me think everyone involved needed to be diagnosed bi-polar and put on medication immediately, to the unrealistic death scenes where the "last twitches" seemed to never end. The characters were unlikeable other than perhaps the two brothers and the cinematography was confusing at best, as they tended to favour long, uncomfortable pauses on insignificant objects for no apparent logical reason.
So, let's get started on the plot(s). Loads of Spoilers!!!
The initial scene is of a women washing up some dishes when she hears a loud bang in her house. She goes to the living room, where I spent too much time wondering why there were two fireplaces, decided nothing is amiss and goes back to the sink. After another louder bang she goes to investigate and apparently gets over killed...I say apparently because we don't actually get to see anything, only get to hear some "killing noises" that we assume she is dead, and I will point out that this lady is of Absolutely No importance to the movie...I wish I knew that before I spent Way too much of the first quarter of the movie trying to tie her into the plot somehow.
There are three couples spending the night at a house belonging to one of the guys parents, apparently to have some fun before they graduate college and go their separate ways. The guy has a brother who is also staying there and just got out of prison two weeks before. There is obvious animosity between the brothers because the one never went to visit the other in jail. We find out later that it's because the one brother went to jail to protect the other brother...what I Really want to know is, how could Anyone get sentenced to three years in prison for Attempting to steal a car?? I've seen murderers serve less time!!
Ok, back to the story(s)...they all have dinner, get high, drink some wine, and during this time we find out that one girl thinks she's pregnant and doesn't know who the baby daddy is, the potential father is having a screaming match on his phone with his coach about getting him scouted to some sports team (I think), nobody trusts the ex-con brother and apparently not even One of the seven people in this house carries their cell phone On them, or all seven of them had to simultaneously charge their phones in different rooms...I'm still not sure but I'm calling BS.
Apparently during all of this nonsense, someone sneaks in this huge house, that is of course in the middle of no where, takes all their cell phones without them hearing and kidnaps one of the annoying girls who is for no reason crying in the upstairs bathroom. Another guy, who I don't care about, goes outside to look for his gfs phone, notices the cars are all messed up and gets killed on the way back. So now there are five people left...big "knock" on the door and GF of guy I don't care about, goes to check on her man, finds him dead on the porch, goes to cry soundlessly over his dead body and gets whacked by a baseball bat to the head a couple times. I gotta admit, at this point I had high hopes of this movie Finally picking up some speed!... I was mistaken again.
The remaining four people got to see the girl get whacked and after a battle to get the door shut the antagonist finally shows his face and he is a creepy clown with a big pot belly. He wants them to let him in, they thought this wasn't a good idea and the clown somehow shuts off the lights in this whole house. Lucky that the ex-con has some brains and grabs a knife and lights the way with his zippo.
Apparently the absentee parents took the guns away from the house two weeks earlier in preparation for their jailbird son to come home because they didn't want guns around a guy who once attempted to steal a car, because...reasons.
Lights turn back on to show younger brothers gf, the girl they kidnapped earlier from the bathroom, to be tied up out back with now two crazy clowns being asked to be let in or she gets killed. Now this is where things get really ridiculous. The clown is shown putting a pool ball up to the gfs mouth...I'm thinking he's gonna probably use it to smash her teeth in or something along those lines, but no...we hear some crunching noises (because we don't get to see pretty much anything in this film), and then all of a sudden the pool ball is bulging out of the girls neck! They made this girl look like a pelican when it has a fish stuck in its throat. The probability of him accomplishing this task without the use of surgical instruments is slim to none. This death scene is the funniest thing I've seen in a while. Her attempts at looking like she was choking were hilarious and her last death twitches seemed to go on forever! I didn't think this girl was Ever gonna die!
Next up, just like in Scooby-doo, the gang splits up, seemingly because the plot needed to move along, and the jock and ex-con decide to check upstairs. They go into a room, equipped with the cons knife and trusty zippo and another clown comes out of no where and kills the jock. The two people left downstairs, the little brother and the girl who may or may not be pregnant, run upstairs and find the ex-con still alive, the jock dead and mysteriously the clown has vanished? I really haven't a clue what happened because the zippo went out.
Side note: I'm pretty sure the brothers Just moved into this house because they don't have a clue where anything is, including the fuse box. And where exactly Is the fuse box?? The clowns are turning the lights on and off with ease. It's either outside where no fuse box is ever located or the inside, vanishing clown guy is flicking the switches, and if that's the case, why doesn't That guy just let the other clowns in?! So many questions....
The three remaining characters decide to make a run for it out the back door. (First semi-smart move they have made in this entire movie) Ex-con gets taken down by a clown in a dress but tells the others to keep running. While Ex-con grapples with that guy, baby bro gets sucker punched with a bat by the original pot bellied clown who then starts choking him out. Pregnant/not pregnant girl starts running down the road only to come across six more clowns holding various weapons who proceed to surround her and kill her...we again don't get to see the kill but they did add in a shot of her mangled body and a couple of those twitches the director thinks is crucial to a good death scene. Ex-con stabs dress clown in the throat and then uses OG clowns bat against him, kills him and gets him off his baby bro. The brothers rush into the garage where the four wheeler the Con was working on earlier (and that was running perfectly fine earlier) was kept, but of course it won't start.
The boys arm themselves ready for battle because they somehow know there are lots of other clowns out there and that's it. Literally... that's it. The end is the worst part of this film because it doesn't exist.
Some other points: what are eight psychopathic clowns doing in the middle of the woods and how did they get there?!? Did they stop to apply the clown make-up right before heading out or do they always run around looking like that? Did they scope out this place beforehand to know the inhabitants weren't armed? That there was no alarm system? That there was no landline? Did they do any Real reconnaissance on the house other than hiding in the bushes that day and breathing really hard?
It seems a pretty far way to walk when there are so many potential variables that could screw up their massacre.
What happened to the clown upstairs??
If they wanted inside So badly, why didn't they just Remain inside while they were taking everyone's cell phones or kidnapping the gf??
What was the significance of the pregnant/not pregnant girl? Who would bring two pregnancy tests to a house party? Why was it important that she didn't know who the father was when there was never a confrontation between her and her bf about the subject?
What happened in the end?!?!
This film had potential, but it missed the mark on so many levels.
