Flight of the Conchords (TV Series)

Mugged (2007)

Jemaine Clement: Jemaine

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jemaine : [rapping]  My rhymes are so potent that in this small segment I made all of the ladies in the area pregnant. Yes, sometimes my lyrics are sexist but you lovely bitches and hos should know I'm trying to correct this.

• Jemaine : You abandoned me. You left me to die.

  Bret : Well, I wouldn't have done it if I'd known you were going to hassle me about it.

• Jemaine : Why are we still paying so much for sneakers when you got them made by little slave kids?

• Jemaine : [rapping]  They call me the Hiphopopotamus, my lyrics are bottomless...

  [long pause] 

• Jemaine : [rapping]  Why? Why? Why, exactly? Be more constructive with your feedback. Please. Wuh-why?

• Jemaine : Murray, I was thinking perhaps we could do gigs at night.

  Murray : No.

  Jemaine : Yes. Most bands -

  Murray : No.

  Jemaine : Most bands play at night.

  Murray : Not again. We've talked about this.

  Jemaine : Most bands play at night.

  Murray : It's too dangerous out there at night.

  Jemaine : We go around walking around at night all the time.

  Murray : Well, you know, anything could happen. You could get run over, pickpocketed, erm... fall down a manhole, bump into people, murdered... imagine that. Or even just ridiculed.

  Jemaine : We've never been ridiculed.

  Bret : No.

  Murray : You haven't?

  Bret : No.

  Murray : Well, that's a surprise. I get ridiculed all the time.

  Bret : Really?

  Murray : Yeah.

  [in a deep voice] 

  Murray : Hey, ginger balls.

  [Ii his voice] 

  Murray : You know?

  Jemaine : That was Bret. He called you that.

  Bret : Oh, the other night.

  Murray : Well, it's not just you, Bret. It's all the time. And it's not just "ginger balls", you know?

  Bret : I thought that was your nickname.

  Murray : No!

• Jemaine : You better watch out, Bret knows karate.

  Bret : Yea, I've got a book on karate... but I haven't actually read it yet.

• Bret : [while being mugged]  But Jemaine loves that camera-phone.

  Jemaine : You can keep it.

• Jemaine : I think you might have ruined my phone when you made me that camera-phone... and my camera.