Ultraviolet (2006) User Reviews

Hot body, not much else going on

[Lithigin · 3/10 · 3 March 2006]

Ultraviolet was embarrassingly terrible on so many levels. My husband and I usually really dig the comic book and action movies, so I think that our expectations were reasonable for the genre. The kinds of movies that Ultraviolet tried to channel were X-Men, The Matrix and Underworld. Unfortunately, this movie failed to do so.

1) Dialogue was laughably bad. One of Milla's lines was actually "Because these beautiful moments turn evil when they're over." What?? This was regarding a romantic pass made at her. Totally incongruous with the setting. 2) Excessive use of CGI is a personal irritant. Additionally, the motorcycle chase scenes were only one step above TRON. I might as well have been watching my 11 year old neighbors play some video game. 3) Zero character development. I didn't care about Violet, the french guy, the scientist guy, the pretty boy, or the evil nose filter guy. I didn't care about their individual goals (mainly because they weren't very clear). I didn't care about characters dying, and I didn't care about the revelation at the end; the only indicator that I had that it was important was her somewhat awed reaction.

To be fair, Milla Jovovich has an incredible face and body and is well-suited for fight scenes. If all-CGI, all-the-time is your thing, then you'll be thrilled with the loads of glossed-over fight scenes involving Milla and hordes of green screen baddies. If you're like our entire theater, you're bored. Really, fake fights just don't impress me.

Definitely not Equilibrium

[ultraelite · 3/10 · 5 March 2006]

Kurt Wimmer who wrote and directed Equilibrium, which imho is a great movie, failed miserably to repeat his former success. The idea's behind the movie had visible potential but unfortunately the execution was extremely poor. Bad acting, a confusing and altogether nonsensical story line, and most of all bad writing really killed this one for me. This movie seemed more like a commercial for CGI than anything else. The CGI however was excellent (except for the last scene, I guess they ran out of money)and probably the most interesting part of the movie. The action which is why I saw the movie suffered from repetition: from the characters, to the setups (Violet is being attacked when she is out-numbered), to the moves, unnecessary sword fighting when they have guns with bullets, unnecessarily repetitive situations (big circle everyone attacks at once and violet wins with ease no challenging battle), and a lack of depth. Kurt really missed the mark, better luck next time.

Errrrr.... What?

[machintim · 3/10 · 3 April 2006]

It is a little difficult to imagine why this film was released in its current form. It has some potential, the action sequences look a little mundane as we have seen it all before but they are quick and effective. The story is quirky enough to be interesting and some of the backdrops look good.

The problem is, Ultraviolet neither makes sense nor holds together as a film. Huge chunks of action and story seem to have been lost on the cutting room floor. The film is left overloaded with the expensive bits that had already been paid for. Lots of sweeping city-scapes and shots of Mila walking down corridors don't make a film.

It reminds me of other Japanese live action Manga smash-ups (See Kasshern etc). The problem is that Japanese films have every right not to make sense and be completely over the top, as it is what they do best. Unfortunately, due to a westernised need for slight reality, Hollywood have attempted same thing and ended up with a cheap looking film with a poor script stuck together with a bunch of crap one liners.

Depends on your taste

[cybereaper · 5/10 · 11 March 2006]

Personally, I love Milla. Even in this, she's still Milla. She's hot, she's fit and she handles the 'tough' role well. I hold the director responsible for bringing it all together. Personally, I didn't 'dislike' this movie. It reminds me of Doom. With the right budget, the right director and time, it could have been the best film of the year. Otherwise, it will leave you feeling like something's been left out. What I liked was the fact I went for a cheesy, mass-action, campy, comic-book/video game movie. I expected fighting, explosions, gratuitous scenes with some nudity and a minimal plot. No, this isn't plot intensive like Silent Hill. (Again, an underlying feature that could have been better handled). So, if you're like me, and you enjoy seeing Milla do her thang, faceless soldiers being under mass slaughter and needless, gratuitous violence, then this is the film for you. Of course, I look for this type of movie only once per year. Just as a break from everything else. The quota has been filled!

Worst movie I've seen in years!

[stokley420 · 1/10 · 3 March 2006]

This movie is absolutely horrible. The magnitude of its suck is unbelievable. The characters in the movie are very poorly developed so when you are quickly put into a silent emotional scene, you're left unaffected. The movie takes place in the future so they add in all kinda of high-tech gadgets that are so stupidly unrealistic it makes you laugh. They try to incorporate unbelievable advanced technology with a more modern day looking setting so the two aspects clash. They can make weapons materialize in their hands but their form of infection control is still rubber gloves. The plot itself is kind of hard to follow and doesn't seem to make any sense at times. How vampires fit into the movie, i have no idea.I signed up to IMDb for the sole purpose of warning anyone who wants to see this movie. This movie was horrible and do not waste a dime on this movie. The only delight i got from this movie is watching the fine Milia Jovovich dance around in skin tight outfits. I cannot stress how awful this movie is. Don't waste your time or money on this film!

Like a German techno video with badly translated Japanese one-liners for dialogue... only less coherent.

[Steph-3 · 1/10 · 5 March 2006]

I had hopes for this movie based on the trailer, but it turned out to be one of the worst I've ever seen.

The special effects range from mediocre to kinda cool, but the plot is too sketchy and absurd to justify their existence. Milla Jovovich's hair and jacket change colors for no discernible reason throughout the film. I think the pretty colors are supposed to distract us from the incoherent script, but it doesn't work. The Sky Captain-style post-processing just makes everything look blurry. (And why is it applied to only half the shots?) Just about everything in this movie is borrowed from something else, and it's slapped together on the thinnest of premises and tarted up with lots of CGI. When there's a break from the ridiculously-choreographed action sequences, the audience is bludgeoned with nonsensical subplots and indescribably awful dialogue. By the time the heroine met the villain in their final showdown, the audience in my theater was laughing out loud.

If you appreciate Milla Jovovich's body, it might be possible to enjoy this film by renting the DVD and watching it with the sound off and your techno MP3 collection blaring in the background while you do something productive, like picking the gunk out from beneath your toenails. Or you could spare yourself the pain and just get The Fifth Element instead.

Not as bad as some would have you believe but certainly no earthly good either

[bob the moo · 4 September 2007]

In the future research into a rare blood anomaly has gotten out of control, making it more infectious and deadly than nature ever did. It spreads. The world become split between the uninfected humans and those infected who have developed the traits of the vampires of old. Known as Hemophages, they fight back in a war led by Daxus as head of the new totalitarian world. In the middle of this war is Violet, a Hemophage whose infection lost her child. Violet steals a secret weapon from Daxus to return to her people. However when the weapon turns out to be a human child with a mutation in his blood Violet hesitates. She goes on the run with the child but both sides seem determined to kill her and her ward.

This film got roundly harsh reviews when it came out in cinemas and it maintains an equally low rating on IMDb but, arrogant as I am, I thought it might be a piece of mindless fun. Well, I'm sad to say that my hope proved to have no founding in reality. It isn't that the film is really bad, because it isn't. It is more than it doesn't really follow through on anything or do anything that well and the result is a rather messy and inconsequential film that I really struggled to feel anything strong about whatsoever – not a sense of fun, excitement, interesting or even hate.

The plot is the first obstacle to get over as it exists in a world that, as Violet first says, is hard to understand. On the surface it is a typical totalitarian state with disease and war at its core and thus surely would offer some potential for commentary on our modern society (OK maybe not V for Vendetta but perhaps something). Sadly no, nothing like that is to be found and instead the world is one of assumptions and half-baked ideas from other sources. This is a minor problem compared to my main issue with it though. Others have picked holes in the specifics but for me it all falls over because it simply takes itself too seriously. On one hand it is a comic book movie with excessive action and loads of (rather obvious) CGI but on the other we get loads of heavy moments that just clunk their way across the screen.

It could have gone either way and have been better for it. It could have been more fun and a bit less full of itself – embracing the comic book style and making the CGI look part of the "unreal" effect rather than leaving them to stand out by looking a bit cheap, like they couldn't match everything else due to budget constraints. Conversely it could have gone more adult, properly explored the maternal theme and developed the characters beyond the one dimensional but then I guess that would have risked the teen action crowd. However by trying to do neither and both at the same time the end result is a bit messy. I could go on but I'll leave others to tell you about the clunky script, roundly flat acting and disjointed story but suffice to say they are correct – nothing is really done well here.

Even the action, which surprised me. Some scenes offer excitement but mostly they are all overdone and full of too many baddies and an inability to keep the camera still for longer than a second to let us enjoy what we are seeing or feel close to it. The one scene I did think was well done was the conclusion; not brilliant because it still suffered from excess but the darkness and the 1-on-1 (as opposed to 700-on-1) did at least make me get into it a bit. Jovovich has a good body and is not a "bad" actress here but really she does offer little more than the basics. Any vague attempt she does make to find the person in her character is either misjudged or ignored and all we are left with is the sight of her in tight clothes killing people while looking sexy; perfect for the teenage boy market but those days are a decade or so behind me and I just felt bored. Bright is dull while I can only assume that Fichtner hoped for a franchise and took a role that would potentially give him an expansion potential in later films (yeah William, drop me a line and let me know how that's working out for ya). Chinlund at least has the good taste to furiously ham it up; maybe it is because he is a ham or maybe it was a decision but either way at least he has a bit of fun and his character never gets sucked into being dry and serious like the rest of the film (he's still not great though).

Overall, not as bad as some would have you believe but certainly no earthly good either. The approach is mixed and mostly fails to inspire, excite, engage or even interest. I would have liked to see it try to do something in particular – be silly, be clever, be childish, be adult – something. Hell, I might even have liked it if it had been such a shambles that it became fun to mock. As it is though it is just totally mediocre, boring, flat and uninspiring. Even teenage boys deserve better.

Need to add negative option to the voting process

[distewart-1 · 1/10 · 5 March 2006]

Well I have officially wasted 88mins of my life on a movie. I have always been open minded to movies. Some have bad acting, errors... etc. I try to put myself into the mind of a lead character and live the movie, turning my mind off to enjoy what's on the screen. I sat down with my popcorn to enjoy a movie that I could care if it had a plot. I was in a mood to see action. Well...... I can't even say I was impressed with even that. This movie had the entire theatre sitting there with a deer in the headlights expression and we all were thinking WTF???? Those that I did know there said they couldn't leave because, like me, they thought it had to get better... We were wrong. I would love to be vindictive and tell everyone to go see this movie. I wasted my money and time... why should I be alone in that. Truthfully, I can't be that mean to even my most hated enemy. If you are going for any reason... at least Milla looks good in her outfits, and the outfits are cool.

Worst movie I have ever seen.

[Batese · 1/10 · 9 April 2006]

I registered at this site just to tell you how GODAWFUL this movie truly is. About 10 minutes into the movie I started praying for a brain tumor to arrive and kill me. Let me break this down for you.

Plot: There is none really. Violet has some kind of ultra-contagious plague that the government is trying to eliminate. Even though it's so contagious that BREATHING THE SAME AIR can infect you. So half the people run around with gas masks. The lead "bad guy" is so obsessive that he buys his GUNS in sealed plastic bags. Which just makes NO sense when you get to the end of the movie. At one point there is a 10 minute (or less) love interest between Violet and some random vampire. No character development, so don't worry about paying attention. Did I mention that there seem to be virtually NO bad side effects to this "plague"? You become super strong, super fast, and super pretty much everything. There are vague references in the movie about Violet "dying" but this isn't really adequately explained so I'm gonna assume since she never DOES die (unfortunately), that it can't be that hard to avoid. They keep using "holograms" as an excuse to build false suspense...but nobody really cares because the movie is just such a pile of crap that I was just blankly staring at the screen at this point.

Graphics: sub par and over hyped. As an example: For some reason these "vampires" who are being hunted to the brink of extinction buy a belt that has a SUN trapped inside it for fusion power...this somehow lets violet drive her motorcycle sideways across a building while being shot at by a helicopter (something about gravity powers). She kills the two pilots and this is apparently enough to make the helicopter explode. The whole time I was watching this, I was bored. HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN? The graphics are SO cheesy that you simply cannot suspend your disbelief. Parts of it just look like a violent Toy Story. Not that I dislike Toy Story, but the point is, the CGI graphics in it should NOT be combined with live action.

I can't go on...this movie was the worst thing I've ever seen.

it is worse than Plan 9 from outerspace.

For the love of ALL that is holy, do NOT see it.

Not nearly as bad as people complain it is.

[kane_locke · 6/10 · 13 February 2008]

After having been given repeated warnings about how bad this film is, I went ahead and watched a borrowed copy. About thirty minutes into the film I had reached a decision: I was enjoying it. While certainly not Oscar-winning material, most people apparently were expecting some kind of cinematic masterpiece rather than what they got, an over-the-top comic book-like action set piece with a modicum of plot to tie together the action sequences.

The gunkata sequences, closer to Wimmer's original idea of the form, do not approach the stark and yet orgiastic death-art of Equilibrium, but they're fun all the same. The movie is full of neat, if improbable, gadgetry, from gravity manipulators to disposable paper cell phones. Nick Chinlund chews a satisfactory amount of scenery without stuffing himself down the viewer's throat. Milla Jovovich herself manages to use a two-dimensional role to display probably the most range I've ever seen her give outside of "The Messenger", and she was certainly much more attractive in this movie than in any of the others I've ever watched her in. All these things contribute to what amounted to a popcorn bowl of a film: not something you'd eat for every meal, but a nice snack for a change of pace when you don't want something too substantial.

The problem seems to be that most people can't just shut off their brains and enjoy a romp once in a while. Would this film ever seriously contend for Best Anything? No. But it certainly does not deserve the almost universal slagging it has gotten since its release. Ignore what you've heard, don't expect too much, and you might just find yourself being entertained for an hour and a half.

You Need to See the Uncut Version (DVD).

[matikalyere · 8/10 · 1 February 2008]

Having watched the regular release version I was somewhat confused as to what was going on, though I was able to surmise the base elements of the plot, but when I saw the uncut version with the scenes left in, things made a lot more sense.

The plot seems a bit obscure at first; unless you're sharp, you're not going to be able to follow it. That is all I will say about that.

It's true the acting wasn't magnificent but I really don't know what everyone is complaining about. Plenty of action, yes, and Milla Jovovich looks great. I thought it was a pretty good watch myself, and I am in the minority there. I definitely don't think it's a waste of time, though it is a bit dark. It's now in my DVD collection, in fact.

Rent it, watch the uncut version. Though not my favourite movie of all time, I enjoyed it.

Underrated.

[hsabgardner · 7/10 · 12 May 2020]

Look, let's be serious. The movie is flashy and fantastic, buried in cgi and special effects, and the plot is rather obscure and strange. What makes the movie good is that it does go over the top. This movie dazzles.

If Mila catches your eye, this movie may be the finest piece that she did around this time. So beautiful.

The best part was the ending.

[smitty124 · 1/10 · 6 March 2006]

I'm going to go set a camera on record, then throw it into a cement sidewalk. This would result in a film that is 10 times better than Ultraviolet. I honestly cannot recall a worse movie. I would have rather watched care bears with my parents. The film does not seem to contain anything that resembles a storyline. We begin right in a poorly animated action sequence that makes absolutely no sense, then continue watching more poorly animated ridiculous scenes for the next hour and a half. To say the acting was horrible would be an understatement. After hearing the infamous trailer line "Are you Mental?", I am also fairly confident the script writer is a five year old with ADD.

Underrated, Kurt Wimmer teams with Milla.

[amesmonde · 22 April 2010]

The opening few minutes of Kurt Wimmer's Ultraviolet is a rip roaring, pulse pounding set up of action sequences and chases. Then the film calms down for a little breather until the next amazing fight sequence.

Following a holocaust some humans have become Hemophages, a sub-species with enhanced physical abilities. Violet, must protect a nine-year-old boy who has been marked for death by the human government.

In the wake of 2005's disappointing Aeon Flux, underrated Kurt Wimmer director of Equilibrium (2002) writer of The Recruit (2003) and Salt (2010) set about creating an up-to-the-minute Sci-fi.However, after shooting wrapped Kurt left after being pressured to deliver less emotional PG-13 rated film. In turn, Ultraviolet was completely re-edited by the studio and apparently this marred the finished product significantly.

Acting wise, William Fichtner puts in an unusual performance, Sebastien Andrieu and Nick Chinlund both seem unsure what's going on. With an abundance of forgettable bad guys, Milla Jovovich excellently plays Violet who has enhanced speed, incredible stamina and acute intelligence. Her character at first seems very one dimensional as she plays her usual Resident Evil kick-ass self. But even in the short running time her character develops, you're given glimpses into here past, as she bonds with 'Six' played well by Cameron Bright.

There's great effects, stunts and a thumping score. A lot of reviews have criticised the CGI usage, however, it's stylised, hyper-real and sleek. It's not meant to be faithful representation of a real world. Holograms, swords, a new invented language, gun-fighting and martial arts. It's science fiction entertainment, set in the 21st century, nothing more, nothing less.

It's fast, it's fun - Ultraviolet is an pleasing sci-fi action but possibly could have been so much more if Wimmer was allowed to deliver his cut.

Killing Is Her Specialty

[claudio_carvalho · 5/10 · 16 December 2006]

In a future totalitarian society, there is a war between humans and the group of beings infected in a government experiment called "hemophages", with enhanced strength and abilities. When the warrior Ultraviolet (Milla Jovovich) is assigned to steal a secret weapon capable of destroying the "hemophages", she discloses that it is actually a boy called Six (Cameron Bright) that has been genetically modified. The maternal instinct of Ultraviolet arises and she fights against the tyrant Daxus (Nick Chinlund) and her mates leaded by Nerva (Sebastien Andrieu) trying to find an antidote and the cure of Six.

"Ultraviolet" is a deceptive movie for many reasons. The first one certainly is the awful screenplay, with a bad story, silly dialogs and no development of the characters. The excessive use of CGI gives the sensation that the viewer is watching a video game, alternating beautiful colorful sequences with very poor special effects, like for example, the motorcycle sequence, when Ultraviolet is chased. I like movies based on cartoons, but Ultraviolet was a great deception. My vote is five.

Title (Brazil): "Ultravioleta" ("Ultraviolet")

Ultraviolet makes movies the likes of, House of the Dead and Mission Impossible 2 seems like Oscar contenders.

[Undertow69 · 1/10 · 6 March 2006]

The idea behind a good Sci-fi movie is making the improbable seems possible. But often this genre is blight by an amalgamation of poor written scripts, weak plots, laughable acting and over the top stunts that turns fantasy into ridicule. And this is precisely the case with Ultraviolet. At first glance the movie appears to be promising. But fifteen minutes into the movie and one quickly realizes that this is just the beginning of an 88 minute roller-coaster ride of boredom. Without given much away, the movie brings nothing new to the table as far as storyline is concerned. The action sequences are far from entertaining and are an insult to the human intelligence. I'll grantee that you'll get more of a trill watching paint dry than watching this cinematic garbage. If you want to loose eight or ten bucks and maintain a shred of dignity, do what other people do and by lottery tickets.

If you liked The Transporters, Underworlds, and Resident Evils, then you won't like Ultraviolet...

[babyloushmoopey · 1/10 · 3 March 2006]

I had high expectations before going in to see Ultraviolet. I liked similar movies (e.g. Transporter, Underworld, and Resident Evil), even though the acting was often lacking and some action scenes were too unbelievable to be real. That being said, I absolutely detested Ultraviolet for all of its shortcomings. Worth mentioning is that many people in the audience left early into the movie (accurately sensing that the rest was going to be just as bad as what they'd already seen). Here are some good things to be said about Ultraviolet: cool special effects, great scenery, nice weapons, and funky costumes. Here are some not-so-good things to be said about the movie: really bad acting, confusing plot, really cheesy moments at the most awkward times, unbelievable action sequences (even more so than Transporter 2), incoherent screen shot sequences, lame one-liners, and (at times) sappy music. At times, I found myself thinking: does the director really think I'm that stupid? Throughout the movie, people keep asking Violet if she was crazy or "mental" for continuing on her violent rampage. Ultimately, I think questions of sanity should be reserved for anyone who goes to see this movie in light of what I and others will no doubt write about it. Trust me on this one: if you find yourself in the theatre watching Ultraviolet, you'll likely be looking at your watch more often than the screen.

Save your money and your time.

Wait for the director's cut!

[metalhead7321 · 7/10 · 8 March 2006]

The film Ultraviolet is a great premise and has some props here and there but it's a near complete failure of a film. WHY? Because of the studio that green light this movie. Information has been exposed that writer/director Kurt Wimmer's vision of the film was cut by the studio by over 30 minutes, 30 minutes that are actually very important to the story, characters and action. So wait for this film to come out on DVD, because the shorten 88 minute verison of the film will totally disappoint everyone. Give this film a chance, when the director's cut comes out, I will Milla Jovovich was very sexy and bad ass in this film, hopefully she will continue to do such films.

Great imagination and visual style, but unjustly compared to bigger movies

[burpingcat · 8/10 · 4 March 2006]

The worst part about Ultraviolet is that it has THREE genres of movies to compete with. People will compare it to the blockbusters of Sci-Fi movies, Martial Arts movies, and Heroine movies. It will have a tough time trying to stand out when people will inevitably compare it to HUGE movies like Crouching Tiger, The Matrix, Kill Bill, Underworld, etc.

Let's remember that Ultraviolet had a relatively small budget, and yet it did quite a bit with it. With all that said, let me say a few words, good and bad ones, on Ultraviolet.

Yes, the story in Ultraviolet is its weakest point. The problem is in the lack of emotional attachment to the characters, the odd choice and delivery of lines (although you can't deny how great the "It is on." line is), and the strange dream-like stuff it goes into at times.

A lot of the themes in this movie are very fleeting, maybe because they've just been done so often, they need no emphasis. There's one particular story element that you might miss ENTIRELY if you didn't pay attention during one shot. That's how little emphasis there is on story in this movie. The plot is also a little hard to follow at times because it jumps around.

It's strange to see so little emphasis on the story when we know from Equilibrium that Kurt Wimmer is very capable of writing a good story. It makes me wonder if the lack of story was intentional or not, but the unfortunate bottom line is that it hurts this movie.

So what saves this movie? Why 8 out of 10? If we were interested in movies only for their story, we wouldn't be interested in movies at all...we would all read books instead.

Yes, a movie is defined as picture and sound. In that case, Ultraviolet is quite an amazingly interesting picture and sound.

Ultraviolet sacrifices story for a very visceral picture and oodles of style. I haven't seen a movie that looks this COOL in a long time. It really reminds me of the type of style that 60's sci-fi movies were going for- very robust in color and costumes, but modernized and expanded for our time. It's certainly a very nice departure from the typical and BORING space station/stainless steel/green look of modern sci-fi.

The action is kick-ass, applause-worthy at times...although I'll admit that I've seen a bit better from similarly-budgeted movies ("Versus" comes to mind). They could've had some more variety to it (like maybe some better/badder foes), but considering who and what they were working with, I think they did a good job.

Another big strength of the movie is the very cool concepts. Color-changing outfits, gravity belts, disposable paper cellphones, crazy ninjas that drop out of planes like giant pinballs, and entire weapon arsenals stored in wrist devices. All of it with designer-quality fashion to it. You can tell where the budget went in this movie. Like I said, it's an older, weirder, more stylish sense of sci-fi that you don't see very often these days. In fact, a lot of this movie can be defined as set-pieces more so than a single flowing experience.

True, their ability to execute some of these ideas (specifically, the motorcycle chase) is limited by their budget. I think it can be overlooked, though. Some rough edges on CG never hurt anybody...anybody that wants to whine about the graphics really doesn't want to appreciate the movie for what it is.

Overall, I enjoyed this movie, more so for its visuals, music, concepts and set-pieces than for its story or characters. It's really quite interesting to look at. There are more moments in this movie that make me think 'awesome!' than in all of The Matrix trilogy. If this movie isn't a success, then I hope it at least inspires the movie that does get this particular formula just right.

Just plain annoying.

[boydeow · 1/10 · 25 July 2006]

There is no need to go into detail about how truly bad this "film" is, as you can find that in most of the other comments.

What I'm curious to find out is did anyone else find that kid EXTREMELY ANNOYING?? Yes, everything else in the film was annoying: nonsensical plot, bad acting, bad SFX, etc.. However, what annoyed me most was that kid with the stupid look on his face all the time! I don't know whether it was his bad acting, the stupid role he had, or just his naturally annoying looks.

Am I the only one to think this? Is it unfair to think this? Has anyone else seen him in another film? Was he just as annoying? Although I'd like to, I haven't seen X-Men: The Last Stand yet, but I see that he's in it, and it has kind of put me off...

Oh, yes - there should be a negative scoring system available! 1/10 implies that there was AT LEAST something you liked about the film. What if there wasn't?

It has been weeks since the terror took me...

[Dario006 · 1/10 · 19 December 2006]

My mind, a fragile thing at best was shattered by the sights I witnessed, the sounds I heard. It is time now though. My constitution has recovered enough for me to pass this warning. Even now my hands shake with recollection of the torment but this message must be passed if others are to escape the same fate as I.

If could build a time machine I would travel back to that fateful day in a video store not long ago and not all that far, far away. I would take hold of my more innocent, unsullied mind and in the words of a far greater film cry "Spare me the madness!!" Words cannot express how much horror my delicate mind was forced to endure in those two odd hours of my life, beasts and blood do not wake me in cold sweats in the middle of the night, but now my night terrors drag me screaming from my slumber with thoughts of that acting/script/casting/directing/production/special effects/CGI/sound track/dialogue/concepts/action/plot (and I use the term as our language lacks a more suitable description of that 'thing')/etc/etc/etc ad infinitum... No foul beast ever called forth from the Necronomicon has possessed such evil as this abomination.

I have seen the true nature of evil and I know for my many sins a fiery and select circle of hell is reserved for me. Below even that final layer of betrayers witnessed by Dante I now know what waits for me. A cinema screen larger than imagination, with a seat from which no soul can ever escape. On that screen which dwarfs all the mountains of Earth one reel is projected, lit by the fires of hell and turned by Beelzebub himself, with audio so loud it downs the cries of all the damned souls… I am trapped there, forced until the end of time to endure that which is...

...'Ultraviolet'.

That will be my punishment and the punishment of all souls who's sins are too great. Be warned my companions of this Earth, avoid this hell, save your minds, save your souls, DO NOT WATCH THIS EVIL!!!

Sucks.

[falmerant · 1/10 · 31 January 2007]

Yes, it has already been said that this "movie" is awful beyond all measure.

However, it is my sincere belief, that by making the mistake of actually watching this "movie", one lades upon him the burden of having to warn the unspoilt rest of humanity from encountering what might be the biggest pile of crap that has ever been conceived since the dawn of time itself.

So, people, here goes: If you are lucky enough to be still untouched by this insolence-become-celluloid, and yet somewhere in the back of your head curiosity strikes and a little voice begins to whisper: "It can't be _that_ bad, can it? Let's see how bad it _really_ is, maybe it's actually fun to watch (Equilibrium certainly was, wasn't it?) ..."

DON'T DO IT!

Every time money exchanges hands so that another innocent soul can be violated by this "movie", God cries. Every time bandwidth is wasted to download Ultracrap, somewhere a kitten dies.

But wait, there's more: "Milla's hot!" the voice (I believe it's the devil's voice by the way, but don't nail me down on this because even Satan himself might not be able to bear this singularity of evil) could say in some unlucky teenager's head. "Let's watch it anyway ..." Let me repeat myself:

DON'T DO IT!

I know Milla's hot. So might be your first shot of Heroin. But in contrast to Ultraturd, there are clinics for people that got pwn3d by H (do I get the lingo right?). So if you really have to see Milla, watch Fifth Element again. Or Resident Evil.

Maybe, to be on the safe side, you could ask a buddy to knock you over the head with a brick, if in a weak moment you are about to give in to curiosity, and actually want to find out how bad Ultramanure really is. You will thank him.

Bullshshshiiit

[eyesaid101 · 1/10 · 20 September 2006]

I cant believe i watched it. Hahahaha such a nonsense. I wonder why was this movie made. It has no story and absolutely nothing new apart from the computer graphics. They are new in the sense that i have never seen such graphics in movies after 1995. Please don't waste your time in watching even the trailer of this movie because you have already wasted time in searching for this movie in IMDb and reading comments. But at least it will save your 90 minutes :). hahhahaha. IMDb has gone mad.. it's not allowing me to post my comment. Says: "Your comment does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for comments is 10 lines of text" ridiculous isn't it.. to write a comment 10 lines long for a movie of this class.

"TMNV: Totally Mommy Ninja Vampire"

[Kamurai25 · 7/10 · 20 September 2020]

Good watch, could watch again, and can recommend.

This is certainly something different. It's a different approach to vampires (hemophages), it's a different approach to sci-fi, and it's a different approach to corporate dystopia. Oddly, the Umbrella Corporation from "Resident Evil" is the closest of which I can think.

Milla Jovovich is entirely capable of performing high action sequences, and carrying the movie, which she does wonderfully. I don't doubt that she has some pull in the production process, but the problems in this are mostly the weak character work and the "I have this really cool idea I'd like to do on screen, it'll be totally different than anything else out there." of it all.

Some of it (nose plugs) are actively distracting, and other things are just odd choices (squared off sword), while there are cool concepts (dimensionally printed weapons), and scenes that just look cool even if they're not especially practical or sensisble (swords on fire in the dark).

My only personal gripes are day walking vampires, weird foley sounds for the guns (most are right, but it is hard to tell on made up guns), and why in the hell people with guns would charge someone instead of firing.

I think this movie holds up as good as it did when it was released, and I have a good time re-watching it.

Worst Rental Ever

[Sabotageuk · 1/10 · 21 November 2006]

OK i did not realise that i was going to waste money on this when i could have rented Munich instead. i mean milla jovovich does her best but she really needs to start picking better scripts or fire her agent. it's not to say that the film is bad (which it is) but if i had wanted to watch what amounted to a 90 minute long Britney spears video then i would have put on any one of the crappy music channels on sky, i was almost clawing my eyes out because of the badness. in my personal opinion equilibrium is a much better film which has better fights etc, for future reference "more fluid gun Kata" does not necessarily mean better.

my advice to anyone is save your cash and rent out something else.