2/10
Slow and tedious.
18 February 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Pauline Kael wrote about Fellini's Satyricon, "... most of the time one has the feeling of a camera following people walking along walls." So watching Out of the Furnace, one has a feeling that most of the time, you are watching A-list actors staring off into space. Thanks to Amazon's "More watch options," you can find out that you can see it for free on Tubi. It's two hours long. There is about 30 minutes of plot. The great thing is that Tubi lets you jump ahead 30 seconds. After suffering for half the movie, I started using the jump feature to improve the pace.

I hated this movie. It starts out with an unrecognizable Woody Harrelson being a jerk at a drive-in movie. No connection to anything, and his character does not get really introduced until a half-hour later. The fundamental problem is that this is a representation of working-class people as imagined by a bunch of privileged bubble-dwelling Hollywood elites. Unlike in Hollywood, in West Pennsylvanian, people are not insular and alone. They are social and interactive. Watch Welcome Home, Roxy Carmichael to see how aloof, provincial and alone Hollywood people are, and how connected and involved and loving the country folk are. Right now the scene just came up where Christian Bale seems to lead a SWAT team into a house. Does anyone with an IQ over 60 think any SWAT team on Earth would allow an amateur ride-along? OK, it's 1:32:35 and it looks like the movie, or half-hour TV show to be precise, is starting. More staring off into space, OK, back to the 30-second fast-forward.

A few minutes ahead, and the plot goes from boring to absurd. Is this how Hollywood writers really think human beings behave? If you want boring and dumb, this movie has it all, and well-acted boring and dumb at that. That is why it bombed, and that is why you can watch it for free on Tubi, thanks for the tip Jeff Bezos!

1:41:41 and I am thinking "Why are you punishing me? Who wants to watch such BS?" My only hope is that each and every character in this flick ends up dead or in Federal prison. The writers, producers and director have a special place in hell reserved.

And...... it's over. The ending was even stupider than the rest of the plot. The closing shot was inexplicable, just like the opening scene, I have no idea or what I am looking at. By taking a screen shot, pasting into IrfanView, and using the gamma to get some brightness in the shot, I can see some post office boxes on the left, and a phone and recorder on the table. Was that where Forest Whitaker was taking a statement? Was the whole killing scene a meth-spun fantasy? OK, now I am pissed. This movie is an homage to sociopaths by a bunch of sociopaths that like to hurt people. I will never watch a Cooper movie again, now that I know he is such a pig.
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