The Pack (2015)
1/10
Let's take a leisurely saunter with... The Pack
16 June 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Go ahead and make a sandwich. You won't miss anything. Honestly, rarely do I see this degree of padding in a movie, outside of say, an arthouse film. Ok, you're telling me a lot of these long stretches of nothing are to build tension. Problem is, EVERY one of these dog attacks, without exception, are TELEGRAPHED. They all happen precisely when you think they will. Zero surprises. I'm blaming an unskilled director, or it's his first movie. I'm too lazy to look.

Story goes like this: A family living on an isolated farm is getting their livestock slaughtered. Turns out to be a really angry pack of feral dogs. Then they come after the family. That's it, and I'm not kidding.

Are they mutated dogs from space? A government experiment? A local is breeding killer dogs? They lapped up some toxic sludge? Yes, this movie is even too lazy to answer that question.

Add a family whose home is being forclosed. For what, sympathy? Well, that was one scene, I suppose to substitute for character development. Do I need to mention the plethora of dumb decisions? It's like these filmmakers watched all the wrong movies with the worst, most hackneyed traits, and said, "Let's make a killer dog movie!" Also, I've said it before and I'll say it again: Just shaking the camera is a terrible way to convey action.

It's my duty to spoil an ending as dumb as this one: Killer dog has mom cornered. Dad shows up in the nick of time to shoot it in the head. Cut to: Pack of angry dogs running back into the forest(!). The family gets together, and hugs it out(!). Here's the BIG TWIST: Ollie shows up! Their pet dog, thought to be dead for the bulk of this trash fire. Well, what a nice and happy ending. That, my friends, was THE PACK.
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