The worst parts of Sucker Punch mixed with the worst of Shadow in the Cloud, ripping off a bit of Moonrise Kingdom with a bit of Alice In Wonderland thrown in because that's never been used as a reference before right?
It's incredibly tiring listening to ominous lines that pretend to say something deep and profound while also trying to move the story forward at the same time. Every single line of dialogue has some double meaning about the character's 'journey', saying something but nothing at the same time.
"Can you bring the power back?" the man asks the girl. Yes, we get it. But that sort of stuff needs to be left in the drafts, not the screenplay.
"It's too dark, I can't see." says the bride in misery. "I can." says the girl going on the journey to find herself. It's all so on-the-nose. Like an amateur play from a first time writer.
I hope the writer/director gets better and learns from this. They've done well to get a film made and completed. Well done for that, and for trying to put some of your life experience into a film. But please consider the audience. Film is a populist medium. Leave the heavy handed stuff to personal poetry. Make an interesting and relatable story. You'll get far more people to see your film and get your message out.
It's incredibly tiring listening to ominous lines that pretend to say something deep and profound while also trying to move the story forward at the same time. Every single line of dialogue has some double meaning about the character's 'journey', saying something but nothing at the same time.
"Can you bring the power back?" the man asks the girl. Yes, we get it. But that sort of stuff needs to be left in the drafts, not the screenplay.
"It's too dark, I can't see." says the bride in misery. "I can." says the girl going on the journey to find herself. It's all so on-the-nose. Like an amateur play from a first time writer.
I hope the writer/director gets better and learns from this. They've done well to get a film made and completed. Well done for that, and for trying to put some of your life experience into a film. But please consider the audience. Film is a populist medium. Leave the heavy handed stuff to personal poetry. Make an interesting and relatable story. You'll get far more people to see your film and get your message out.