5/10
"If you're into killing cops, I'm not even a police officer."
18 November 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Lordy Mama - Have you ever seen two dumber cops this side of Mayberry RFD? Andy Griffith only had to deal with one Barney Fife. And the thing is, the two goofball deputies were playing it straight while entirely incompetent. Even Ron Perlman looked like he had to grit his teeth and bear it through to the final outcome, which in his case, didn't turn out all that satisfactory anyway. The only redeeming factor for me in this picture was the beautifully scenic locations of Ulster County, New York, exactly one county north of where I live, so the town names were familiar and my former company actually makes deliveries to the Phoenicia Diner. I wouldn't bet on Marla (Sondra James) actually working there, but it wouldn't be too hard to find out.

Among other puzzlements, I'm still wondering why The Sheriff (Perlman) drank his black coffee with eight sugars. Unless I missed it, the story never got around to answering that question, but it probably doesn't matter. The story ends pretty much as it began, but with an additional participant playing cops and robbers. However if you believe that these three nincompoops could have been hired as Mounties by the Canadian government, there are a handful of bridges available for sale around here. Kind of cheap too. Actually, Prisoner 614/Andre (George Sample III) struck me as pretty much a regular guy who got hosed by the legal system, so why he even bothered to team up with the other two yokels once they crossed the border is beyond me.

The town and environs of Shandaken, New York has a couple of interesting aspects that the picture didn't get around to mentioning. There's a little hamlet within the town limits called Big Indian, and the name 'Shandaken' itself is derived from a Native American phrase, 'land of rapid waters'. Had the movie included those two little gems it would have been a lot more entertaining.

My rating includes a bonus point for the gorgeous Mountie uniforms.
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