Swamp Thing (1982)
3/10
An era DC would probably like to forget
21 March 2017
If you're keeping up to date with the now rampant battle between comic powerhouses Marvel and DC then you'll probably know that Marvel are waaaaay ahead with their 'shared universe' and DC are, despite Batman, Superman and Margot Robbie in hotpants, lagging behind significantly. Back before such an epic cinematic conflict took place, DC had a fair few minor 'superheroes' on the silver screen, yet little way made of it. 'Swamp Thing' is one such example. And for good reason. It's pretty awful.

Many people have slated DC's recent offerings such as 'Batman vs Superman' and 'Suicide Squad.' Personally, I quite enjoyed them, but if people had to sit through 'Swamp Thing' they'd really have something to gripe about! I watched it for three reasons: (1) It had Ray Wise in it. He's hardly a 'big name' in cinema, but, if you've seen him in 'Twin Peaks' (and pretty much anything else), you'll know he's a damn fine actor and always gives an intense performance. (2) It was directed by Wes Craven and (3) It's DC – and therefore may one day be dragged kicking and screaming into their floundering shared universe.

I was basically short-changed on all my three reasons. For a start – the great – Ray Wise was hardly in it (sorry if that's a minor 'spoiler' but there's little anyone can say that will spoil this film any more than it already is. Yes, the equally great horror maestro Wes Craven did direct it, but it was one of his early films that I think he probably never put on his C.V. Surely he must have only done this one for the paycheque! And finally, if this is an example of what happens in the 'Swamp Thing' then I hope he stays well clear of Batman and Superman! It's just awful (I think I already said that). Sorry, I can't think of any other way to describe it. No, I'm not a 'film snob' who only wants to watch 'high art' with deep and meaningful character development (hell, one of my favourite films is 'Flash Gordon' so I'm well up for a good 'good-bad' film any day!).

There are old horror/sci-fi films which, despite their age, still stand up today. 'Swamp Thing' will never be one of them. I even spoke to someone who had read some of the comics it was based on and she confirmed that the film was completely different (and not in a good way!). The 'climactic' end battle between hero and villain is truly laughable and like something out of a parody using men in rubber suits to slug it out (think that scene in 'Crank 2' that just sort of came out of nowhere!).

Just don't bother with this at all and pray that DC have upped their game to produce the output they do today. You may hate 'Dawn of Justice' and 'Suicide Squad' but, compared to 'Swamp Thing' they are truly cinematic greats!
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