To Jennifer (2013)
2/10
One long a** road trip with no payoff
7 May 2016
Warning: Spoilers
This is billed as a comedy. Other than a couple of minor laughs, it is not in the least funny. Nor is it horrifying. Nor is it even remotely interesting. It's a 'home-made' movie about two dudes, who are cousins, filming one dude's slam against his cheating girlfriend. They go on a plane where girlfriend-dude throws a major panic attack and ends up staying in the hospital for three days under psych eval. That was tipoff number one.

They finally get out, and the dudes call third dude, who comes to pick them up. BTW, girlfriend-dude is Joey, cousin is Steve, and douche-dude is Martin. Anywho, they get to Martin's house, where Joey proceeds to have a meltdown. He wants to travel to Jennifer's house (girlfriend) with the footage to film her cheating. I was never sure of the purpose of the film; no one ever mentioned what they wanted to do with it, other than show it to Jennifer as proof of her infidelity. Maybe YouTube.

Martin takes his buds to a party and tries to hook Joey up with someone else. Unfortunately, the girl kicks Joey's a**. They go back to Martin's house, where Joey continues to whine and nag about the road trip until Martin gives in. An hour into the trip and they stop at a rundown motel, which has the obligatory crime scene room. Martin parks them in a quasi-functional room and takes two hours to procure two hookers (one of them is a shemale) for Joey, who goes postal. Martin leaves, Joey follows. He goes to an ATM to get the money that Martin didn't have for the escorts, and kills Martin while he's at it, stealing the dead man's car.

The cousins finally get to the house, some loud screaming between the two occurs, and Joey goes into Jennifer's house. He left the trunk of Martin's car open, and Steve discovers Martin's dead body inside it, so, being the total idiot he is, he enters the house to hunt down his wayward cousin, earning himself his death for disobeying Joey. The rest of the film is Joey hunting his 'girlfriend' and terrorizing her.

This thing was a mess from the get go. It was violently anti-woman, depicting females as sluts and whores. Not one single female was represented in a positive way; even the mother was lacking. The director really needs to take a long, hard look at himself, and figure out why he hates women like he does.
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