4/10
Who ruled the earth? Busty bikini babes, perhaps, but definitely not the dinosaurs!
6 January 2015
"Blondes have more fun" is what the popular expression says, but this definitely isn't applicable to the prehistoric world perspective of writer/director Val Guest! The blond-haired protagonist of this film leads quite a miserable life as a fugitive and outcast. She – Sanna – initially lives in a tribe for which the sun is their God and they ritually sacrifice their blond family members. During the ceremony in which Sanna is supposed to be sacrificed, a heavy storm breaks loose and she manages to escape. She joins another tribe and immediately receives a lot of male attention, but the brunettes in that tribe promptly invent the behavior female jealousy and poor Sanna is again exiled. Roaming through the raw landscape, she seeks shelter in a broken dinosaur egg shell and mama dinosaur takes custody over her the very next day. I have tremendous respect for Val Guest! After all, he was the director of some of the greatest and most groundbreaking (Hammer) productions such as "The Quatermass Experiment" and "The Abominable Snowman". Val Guest undeniably was a very visionary and intelligent director, but perhaps this bombastic project was *slightly* over- ambitious and unfeasible. There were quite a lot of dinosaur flicks and caveman adventures being released in that era (1960- 1970), but Guest wanted his to be superior and more realistic than the rest. They even invented a specific language existing of 27 different words, but all I ever heard was "akita". Akita, akita, akita! At a certain point I was convinced that "akita" was the primitive word for "boobs" or "cleavage", because literally all women in this film have luscious curves and are scarcely dressed, so I automatically presumed that all males were delirious. Via the trivia section here on the website, I later found out that "akita" simply means "look over there". Bummer! Even though original and clever, the restricted vocabulary of the cast members quickly leads to dull, repetitive and overlong footage. The dinosaurs look impressive enough, thanks to the brilliant expertise of Jim Danforth, but there's too few action and excitement. Besides, the title doesn't make a lot of sense since the dinosaurs are a lot less fierce than most of the women. Speaking of which, did I mention that the women are gorgeous? Blondes or brunettes, prehistoric women are genuine beauties! Akita, dammit
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