At some point in the future, scientists will be able to prove that watching terrible movies is harmful to your intelligence and overall psyche. The day they do that, this movie is going to be named in my lawsuit.
The wife and I love a good horror movie. But we also enjoy putting on a bad horror movie and making fun of it. Some movies, such as this one, are so bad that you can't even extract comedy from them.
For instance, it's been scientifically proved that Demons at the Door is the worst movie ever made (and will also be named in my lawsuit). However, it's so absurd that you can laugh at it.
I don't even need spoilers to illustrate how bad this movie is. The quality is just so bad that a lot of the time your face will be scrunched up in a "what the hell was the point of that?" expression.
The cuts are awful. In one scene, the blast of typical horror movie "shock" music cuts flat off. I almost guarantee they noticed something wrong with the scene in the editing room and instead of re-shooting, they just said, "cut it there."
There are long, pointless pauses in the dialog. The expressions don't match the actual mood. The scenes skip all over the place.
Worst... the music. Most modern horror movies use the typical method of focusing on the main character in the scene, then something flits by in the background while they play a short, intense burst of "shock" music meant to startle you. In most cases, without the sound, the scene wouldn't make you jump and wouldn't even be ominous. Well, apparently the person who produced this movie was so startled by the flit/shock- music thing during some movie that he decided to use it every few minutes. I'm not exaggerating. If they change scenes, there is a burst of shock music. If they zoom in on someone's face, it is accompanied by shock music. If the main character reaches for a Kleenex, it definitely calls for shock music. I was baffled when I reached for my coffee and no music played.
Acting wasn't terrible. Plot has been done a thousand times. Main actress is cute. But they should never have let the monkeys into the editing room... the choppy, ham-fisted style ruined even the possibility of a corny B movie and the subsequent laughs.
You've been warned.
CWB
The wife and I love a good horror movie. But we also enjoy putting on a bad horror movie and making fun of it. Some movies, such as this one, are so bad that you can't even extract comedy from them.
For instance, it's been scientifically proved that Demons at the Door is the worst movie ever made (and will also be named in my lawsuit). However, it's so absurd that you can laugh at it.
I don't even need spoilers to illustrate how bad this movie is. The quality is just so bad that a lot of the time your face will be scrunched up in a "what the hell was the point of that?" expression.
The cuts are awful. In one scene, the blast of typical horror movie "shock" music cuts flat off. I almost guarantee they noticed something wrong with the scene in the editing room and instead of re-shooting, they just said, "cut it there."
There are long, pointless pauses in the dialog. The expressions don't match the actual mood. The scenes skip all over the place.
Worst... the music. Most modern horror movies use the typical method of focusing on the main character in the scene, then something flits by in the background while they play a short, intense burst of "shock" music meant to startle you. In most cases, without the sound, the scene wouldn't make you jump and wouldn't even be ominous. Well, apparently the person who produced this movie was so startled by the flit/shock- music thing during some movie that he decided to use it every few minutes. I'm not exaggerating. If they change scenes, there is a burst of shock music. If they zoom in on someone's face, it is accompanied by shock music. If the main character reaches for a Kleenex, it definitely calls for shock music. I was baffled when I reached for my coffee and no music played.
Acting wasn't terrible. Plot has been done a thousand times. Main actress is cute. But they should never have let the monkeys into the editing room... the choppy, ham-fisted style ruined even the possibility of a corny B movie and the subsequent laughs.
You've been warned.
CWB