Buenos Diaz and welcome to my lecture, I mean review, of the Diaz-driven comedy "Bad Teacher". OK, I am not going to fire away on "Bad Teacher" but I am not going to give it cinematic tenure either. As mentioned, on the starring dais of "Bad Teacher" is the applelicious Cameron Diaz, who is not bad here, actually she was pretty good. Diaz stars as Elizabeth Halsey, a Middle School Teacher who craves to get a breast ahead of the golddigger sweepstakes by finding conniving ways to get money, so then she can get a boob job so she can marry rich. Halsey's Vomit and other unethical behaviors (showing movies in class, smoking pot, embezzling school fundraising money, etc) throughout her working school day make her a
. see movie title. She catches the eye of Scott Delacorte, a substitute teacher whose parents are immensely wealthy due to their lucrative watch company. Therefore, like clockwork, Elizabeth has her new victim to somehow marry rich in the future. Justin Timberlake was in sync playing the dorky Delacorte, and was hilarious in a school dance scene. Ms. Halsey's rival is fellow teacher Ms. Squirrel solidly portrayed by the up-and-coming Lucy Punch. This Squirrel teeths into Halsey's mischievous ways; and Ms. Squirrel's unorthodox, corny-pun teaching methods might just be as horrific as Ms. Halsey's behaviors. But who am I to criticize corny puns, there are plenty of those already marked in this review. Two other performances that hit the B+ barometer in "Bad Teacher" were of John Michael Higgins who plays the dolphin- loving Principal Snur, and Phyllis Smith as Elizabeth's only teacher- friend Ms. Davies. However, the thespian valedictorian of "Bad Teacher" is Jason Segel as P.E. Teacher Russell Gettis, whose repeated Gettisburg Address to get into Elizabeth's pants was quite entertaining. Segel is one of the brightest comedic actors of today, and everything he is in gets automatically bumped up a grade. So why don't I put "Bad Teacher" in the school of stellar comedies? Due to Director's Jake Kasdan orchestration of "Bad Teacher" in the last semester, I mean act of the movie. He was off to a great start with some outstanding opening sequences, but as the film went on it sure could have used some creative composition. Gene Stupnitzky & Lee Eisenberg's screenplay has its sporadic hilarious comedic lines within the dialogue, but needed a script tutor for its redundant narrative. I will pass "Bad Teacher" with a C+, mostly due to its drama team of actors. If you were able to read this pun-driven review, thank your preacher, because I bless you for having the courage. *** Average