addeisdead Review of Lizard Lick Towing

Lizard Lick Towing (2011–2014)

Mindless Reality TV Just Became Even More Mindless

[1/10 · 22 February 2011]

The only thing I can imagine that's worse than reality TV is scripted reality TV. Lizard Lick Towing is about a real repo company, but every episode contains scripted reenactments of their exploits. The characters, despite being real people, are completely unbelievable, and most of the situations on the show are clearly over exaggerated. In one episode, the boys try to repossess a man's mustang. The guy jumps into the car, drives it off the hitch, and then drives off. Rather than trying to get away, he circles back to where he started and then drives the car into a pond. In true Ronnie Dobbs fashion, he gets out of the car, stands on top, and flips them a double bird. The boys "trick" the redneck by offering him $250 to wade out into the pond and hook up their chain so they can tow the car out. After he does this, they push him into the pond and take off running. The guy shows up with two friends outside a restaurant later as Ron and his wife are having dinner. Ron calls Bobby, and they confront the man in the parking lot. Bobby decks one of the guy's friends, and then Ron picks the man up and body slams him into the windshield of a car while Bobby takes out the other friend. The three rednecks just lay around in the background doing nothing while Ron argues with his wife and then talks to Bobby. Everything about this episode was so fake that I couldn't believe it was being presented as real. In one of the "All Worked Up" episodes, Bobby actually charges a man holding a rifle. All of the action is inter-cut with Ron saying things like, "I'm as proud of her as a little puppy that's got a new flea." This is a pathetic excuse for entertainment.