Review of Beach Girls

Beach Girls (2005)
2/10
Bad. No, horrible. No, really like so totally horrible.
19 July 2010
Warning: Spoilers
This is soap-opera bad: dialogue, story, plot, and acting. It wouldn't be worth discussing but all 6 reviews here are positive. K?

Mom died. Dad takes 16-year-old daughter to the beach he goes to every summer. Except this is somehow her 1st time there? She meets new boy and girl friends. They are snooty at 1st but they open up later and a real bond develops as they share problems/ hopes/ aspirations/ concerns.

Daughter's dealing with issues about her mom's death. Her new friends struggle with various issues while their parents have issues too. Other townspeople have various other issues.

Her dad has issues but he has help from a hot young girlfriend, whom daughter dislikes. This is complicated by some passion between dad and a maybe ex-, who was one of the dead mom's 3 best friend's. The 3rd best friend is dad's sister, who has a drinking problem and was driving the car when mom was killed.

Dad finds out mom had a secret life (bank account, affair, more). And dad has a job offer in CA. Will he turn it down in favor of his family? Find out in episode 6.

Cloris Leachman has old house that will be torn down if the new highway goes through. Bribes may be involved w/ the highway plan. A local cop is having sex with an underage girl. Someone's brother died of leukemia and her mother still has issues about that.

The story unfolds as follows: Some characters have an emotional encounter; someone storms out, visibly upset; he or she walks along the beach; then goes to someone to pour out his/ her feelings. Repeat over and over. Virtually every scene change is precipitated by a long camera shot of a pained facial expression.

Everyone's well-to-do but, hey, the wealthy have real emotions too. Oh lord, please don't let me be misunderstood.

You can fast-forward through entire sections without missing any material aspects of the story. Although you might miss key lines eg. "It's no good if I have to ask you if you care when I needed to know how much you cared. And now I can't"; "How well did you REALLY know your wife?"; "I need to know what happened that night."

Net, it's the movie equivalent of teenage girls texting each other "OMG I bet it's not the 1st time she let him touch her there."

The only plus is that Julia Ormond's is often braless and her headlights are on all the time - even when she's sitting quietly in hot sun. OTOH, her accent comes and goes.

Every time I watch a TV-movie I'm nonplussed and how dreadful it is. Presumably this is what TV viewers want. It's pretty sad.

Lowe's not much of an actor but he heads above anyone else (Ormond doesn't have much of a role). In his reflection it's amazing to see how pathetic directing, acting, and scripting can be - and still make it to the screen.
1 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed