Review of Crank

Crank (2006)
1/10
A 7.1??? Are you Kidding Me??
20 September 2008
The rating that this movie has on this site is a good example of how ignorant our culture really is. I'm honestly debating whether or not this is the worst movie I've ever seen. It's that terrible. What could have been a fun action movie is actually an 84 minute commercial that takes itself far too seriously. Stay far away.

There is seriously nothing good about this movie other than the production value, which means absolutely nothing to me. I've seen great movies with horrible production quality but they had everything else. This has nothing else, at all. The story sucks, the only thing it has going for it is Beijing Cocktail but even that is over the top. As I said earlier, it is just like long commercial. There is so much product placement and it's so blatant and in your face that it made me want to vomit. The story is so miserable that the producers attempted to cover it up with flashy special effects and "fun" action sequences. What have I left out? Oh yeah, the "acting." The acting was pretty bad. Not horrible, just like Hallmark channel miniseries bad. I can't believe I made it all the way through this poor excuse for a film.

This movie sucks. There's no sugar coating necessary. Just don't see it and live your life. There are so many good films to see instead of this piece of crap.
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