Solarbabies is a hilariously inept clunker from the eighties. Everything about the movie is either so dumb, puerile or ridiculous it is staggering at times. It basically involves a bunch of generic eighties teens roller-skating around a Mad Max style dystopian future chasing after a sentient glowing magical orb that can save the world. Words cannot express how ridiculous the sight of these dudes skating around the place in formation is. Or how ridiculous and hokey the scenes of them prancing around with the glowing ball of light are- the kind of scenes that would be too cringeworthy and schmaltzy even for a Disney movie. Or how painfully cheesy the synth heavy score is it sounds like it belongs in a Care Bears movie and that it has been produced on a $10 Cassio. Or how nonsensical and threadbare the plot is- god knows what was meant to have happened at the very end of the movie or what the deal with Bodhai, the sentient glowing ball, was. It is kind of like they tried to combine E.T. with Mad Max but with more Roller-skates. That's not even mentioning the fact that two of our main characters, including the lead, are virtually indistinguishable. I wasn't sure how many members there were in the main group of teens for most of the movie- if it was one, two or three dudes I was getting mixed up. Nor is mentioning the goofy and superfluous quasi-American Indian character, the blatantly flaming leather clad prisoner warden, the embarrassed looking Charles Durning, the undeveloped subplot of the eco-warriors, the foggy motivations of the evil cooperation ruling the world, or the unfunny and inexplicable supporting roles of Alexi Sayle and Bruce Payne or
I could go on. Solarbabies is one long series of ultra cheesy cringeworthy eighties dreck. Recommended only for those with a high tolerance for that sort of thing.
Review of Solarbabies
