Ham & Cheese (2004)
Ham & Give Me My Money Back
19 March 2006
I bought this movie for 2.99 at Blockbuster thinking there is no way I will regret it because it costs less than renting a movie and it has Dave Foley and Scott Thompson of The Kids In The Hall in it.

Don't be fooled because Foley and Thompson are both in it for about a minute each. I bet they wish they didn't even do that much in it because the movie is terrible.

The worst part is the guy who plays the chubby mentally challenged guy who wants to be an actor..... the other guy in the movie also plays a stupid guy who wants to be an actor but the chubby one wins the award for worst acting ever. Sitting for an hour and a half while a guy pretends to be brain damaged so badly that he must be brain damaged in real life is not my idea of a good time. I still don't know how I managed to watch the movie all the way to the end.

Here is a typical scene the chubby stupid guy would do. "Hey chubby stupid guy I am directing this play." "Duh ...... okay." "Do you know how to act?" "Duh ..... yeah sure. I can act." "Okay then read this page." "Duh .... what's acting? Duh I'm stupid. Remember how I was stupid and didn't understand things an hour ago? Well it is still exactly the same now. You're not getting bored of this yet are you?" The other guy at least gets a smile if not a laugh for the Scott Thompson scene. Thompson's reactions to his awful acting where he does everything wrong he possibly could are very funny and he ends up attacking the guy, but like I said this is just like one minute in a whole hour and a half film.

The other characters are blah blah blah. Samantha Bee from the Daily show is in it and not bad but only in a few scenes, it would help if there were more with her or especially with Foley and Thompson. Foley was okay but his scenes were with the Chubby guy so they were ruined by his brain damaged act. An actual scene with Foley goes, the chubby guy reads a bad scene and Foley is an acting teacher, "How was that read?" "It was terrible, you should quit etc etc", "Duh...... so should I read it again?" IF that sounds annoying you are right. This movie is annoying and pretty much nothing happens in it. Two bad actors want to make it big and neither of them make it. That's the whole story so why an hour and a half? Good question I don't know either.
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