2/10
Mind-Numbing!
20 December 2005
A scientist in the wilds of Alaska has created a flying saucer and both the CIA and KGB are interested in the new technology. Such is the premise of The Flying Saucer, and if you were looking for aliens, a creative spaceship, or anything which might resemble good film-making - sorry you lose! This is one abysmal film. Mikel Conrad wears the hats of producer, screenwriter, director, and leading man; none fit too well - or at all. It seems that the CIA and the United States government is so hard up for help that they must enlist the aid of a "two-fisted" drinking playboy in New York who just happens to have roots in Alaska. So off goes Mike Trent with his "nurse" Vera Langley. Vera is played by the very forgettable Pat Garrison whose acting range is no range at all. She looks so disinterested through much of the film playing matron to tough guy Trent. Tough guy, yeah right! Mikel Conrad looks like he just left his barcolounger and got another piece of pie as he stumbles through this dreck. I have to be pretty harsh on Conrad here, because he is responsible for so much of the film. How he ever got backing for this project God only knows. Conrad's inept, stoic stumbling on camera is his worst fault in The Flying Saucer, but closely following its heels are his "abilities" as a director. His choice of music to accompany all the action in the movie just about put me to sleep. It sounds like something you might hear in one of those 50s movies made about putting out forest fires or how to avoid catching venereal diseases. Not to be outdone are some of the special effects as well. How about that glacier blow-up and what happens to one man screaming as he falls or the Russians who look like old veterans from the black and white version of Northern Exposure. And let's not forget that spaceship. All you see is it bounce across a very dark sky a few times and then rest in the ground looking like the smallest cast member from Willow MIGHT be able to get in. The acting is just horrible as previously stated with Conrad showing a range of no emotion flying a plane across the Alaskan wilderness with at least three possible engine failures looming. Now, that takes guts to just sit and look like you are waiting in a deli line for your sandwich to be made. After Conrad and Garrison, Hantz von Teuffen stars as - Hans, the mysterious caretaker of the lodge who looks like he wants to kill our two protagonists but waits to do so for the worst possible moment. Yes, Denver Pyle is in this and he is not able to rise above this material. This is a truly bad film that promises some kind of science fiction and delivers nothing. In that regard it is a disappointment. But if you like bad movies that are funny because they are bad, then The Flying Saucer is just up your avenue. It will deliver the goods with gut-wrenching laughs as the incompetence ensues. That is if you are able to stay awake through it.
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