1/10
Woah...
21 June 2005
Warning: Spoilers
This movie was awful! I happened to be channel surfing and I caught a commercial half an hour before it came on. It was too good to be true.

I think that the people who made this movie 1) don't know much about computers, and 2) have little or no experience with porn. Astounding. While Jeremy enjoys looking at porn, he NEVER masturbates, even when he looks at it for the first time (guessing from how he looks, 17, which is entirely unrealistic). The porn in question is usually less hardcore than Sports illustrated, until he gets into bondage, which isn't the worst fetish out there.

The kids in his school reached a new level of comedy. Thete were only two black kids, and they kept showing up in the background everywhere. His swim team friends made fun of him for watching porn, and then they got mad because he somehow got their e-mail addresses on a spammer's list. They seemed to react as if none of them wanted to look at porn, although they seemed compelled to open the e-mail.

Another dumb part was that Jeremy used pay sites to get porn. Who does this? I'll tell you who: 50 year old men who have little experience with the computer.

But the pest part of the movie was the "Virgin Vaginas" CD. For those of you who haven't seen it yet: Jeremy's younger brother also gets "addicted" to porn, and for some reason he burns porn IMAGES onto a CD, then hides in in his dresser drawer, probably the worst hiding place ever.

Let me say that there are very few times when you should burn porn onto a CD. If you are, say, getting a new computer and you have a lot of videos or if you have something particularly memorable like if the man makes that Tim Allen grunting noise for all ten minutes (yes, I have it) then there might be some reason to make that CD.

However, this kid decided to burn a handful of *.jpgs onto a CD to use ON THE SAME COMPUTER! If he wanted to see these pictures again, all he had to do was copy the URLs to a *.txt and save it in some hidden place, like a game file with a title like "rules2.txt" and nobody would ever find it. It was just there to advance the plot. And what did he write of the CD? Did he leave it blank, or maybe write "Metallica" on it or just leave an "X" on it so he knows what it is? No. He writes "VIRGIN VAGINAS" on it in big, clear letters. I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe.

Finally, I have one other problem with it: for a movie about porn addiction, there was no masturbation or sex - AT ALL. The "porn video" consisted of a woman in a lingerie outfit dancing. Dancing which would be allowed at a prom.

Nobody in this film acted the way a human being would act in real life. Jeremy pressuring his girlfriend with her bedroom door open and her mom in the next room was a good example. Who would do that? Another time was when he inserted a flash card into the computer and later it was called "hacking", or when it was implied that his swimming skills were affected because he had seen porn the night before. All of it was crap.

It was a pretty funny movie, and I can't wait until it comes out on DVD so I can put it next to "Playmate of the Apes".
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