Review of Mars

Mars (1997)
EEEEWWWWWW!!!!
14 May 1999
Do you know what this movie reminded me of, Chuck Norris on steriods and trapped on Mars. That's all. The plot did not make any sense what-so-ever. The movie started right away with no explaination of what the story was about, only a guy running through a tunnel. It sounded like this guy was having sex by all of the panting that was going on. Then his brother shows up, this Caution fellow, never smiles (not once), and then starts the Chuck Norris on steriods bit. This movie had nothing to do with Sci-Fi. It should have been listed under Action not Drama/Sci-Fi. Usually in Drama's you can figure out what the movie is somewhat about. One other thing upset me, was that Caution had this sidekick, who reminded me of the mouse in those cartoons that would circle the bigger/stronger mouse again and again and say stuff like, "what are we going to do boss?, are we going to hurt..." stuff like that.

My advice, save your coins. Go buy a soda, it'll feel better in the end.
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