Review of Mikey

Mikey (1992)
1/10
Why would anyone enjoy this film is beyond me.
2 October 2002
Geez, I suppose one were to appreciate this film if they figured Mikey had horrible parents growing up or perhaps he's that Calvin from "Calvin & Hobbes." Still, that wouldn't account for anything in this film because it's bad in several ways. I could start by saying "Mikey" isn't scary AT ALL. Maybe that should be enough.

No wait, it's more than just not scary. It's terrible on every level imaginable. I swear, the filmmakers must have hired monkeys to write this screenplay because there's nothing you can remember from it! I suppose it would be nice to examine the supporting characters because usually they're more underexamined compared to lead characters. Certainly that shows in "Mikey" because everyone besides Mikey seems to be a pawn in the game, rather than a character you want to care about. Yes, all plot and no development in the supporting characters. Typical uninspired filmmaking, yep.

However, since little time is given to the supporting characters, it's pretty obvious that "Mikey" examines what the title is all about. Wait, did I say "examine?" How good does it examine Mikey? Hardly that much. See, remember with suspense films like these, it's about PLOT, not characters, just PLOT. Regardless, a suspense film can still be pulled off if you blend plot and character together in a nice fashion. That's what the Hitchcock films did. No wait, I don't think the filmmakers of "Mikey" ever studied Hitchcock so it's pointless to talk about him. Still, they should know that character development can really help. No wait, in the filmmaker's point of view, perhaps it doesn't. See, Mikey as a little child is a nasty bugger but the biggest issue isn't because he isn't nasty. It because we know EXACTLY what he's going to do. See, as characters in a film, the villains can steal the show. But in "Mikey," Mikey doesn't steal the show nor does he actually show any motivations. See remember, this film believes in plot, not character development, but plot.

The even bigger issue I have with "Mikey" is why it was made. Ironically the year the film was made (1992), just a year after it came "The Good Son," which starred a young Elijah Wood and Macaulay Culkin. Like "The Good Son," "Mikey" believes that children who act as killers can make a scary, non-moralistic kind of film. Yea, sure. People who do these kinds of films are really sick puppies. Seriously. If you can't show any CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT to make us care, then you might as well just be an idiot.

As for the people who enjoy these kinds of films with child killers, get help, please. It must stink to be you.

By the way, I could really tell this was a direct to television movie. Wanna know how? It was done in a hurry. At least it seems that way.
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