I'd like to say I don't really feel entitled to comment on this movie after I gave up 40 minutes in. But nevertheless...
I bought this cheapy and cheery DVD for the grand sum of £2.99 at the local newsagents.
My doubts about the quality of this film began shortly after the underwater earthquake. Yes you heard me, underwater earthquake. In Scotland. Underwater. This is explained by the line "Actually Scotland is located on a large tectonic fault." For comparison; this is similar for the overlook hotel to get randomly swept away by a tsunami in the Shining and having dick halloran and a policeman standing over the ruins and the policeman explaining "Actually Colorado has quite a large coastline."
But maybe I'd let that one pass. Serious doubts were added when the action flitted back to a sandy rock a.k.a Afghanistan for no reason other than to get the yearly exotic Asian fix in.
Slowly other incidents crept in. Such as the sub-tropical nature of Scotland I had not noticed. Or the fact that a community entirely dependent on tourism asserts "We don't like outsiders." And random scenes for no apparent reason are dubbed. Badly.
From here things simply got worse; the police force apparently in unison with the local populace seems determined at destroying the economy with the repeated assertion he wants no more of this Nessie rubbish. The accents go from low to low. The same CGI effect is repeatedly used. And its not even a good one; it looks like a brown log underwater.
Its not long before hippies swarm down from their climes and see Nessies recent carnage as a good reason for bobbing occult ceremonies. Nessie despite being the size of a small oil tanker has no problem entering low tide completely submerged and massacring the pagans without being seen.
The point were I cracked was when a major character randomly turns to another mid-argument and yells 'Is this because of our divorce?' She the breaks into tears. WHAT? Not the slightest provocation was dropped for this other than the sudden need for a romantic lead.
I went away but from those foolhardy to sit through I hear a stunning conclusion was achieved with explosives and what not. I'm assuming the two main characters realised their divorce was too soon and the evil overlord financing the operation from his New York lair got some kind of comeuppance but that is by-the-by.
My verdict: Aninsulttoallthatisgoodandtrue/10
I bought this cheapy and cheery DVD for the grand sum of £2.99 at the local newsagents.
My doubts about the quality of this film began shortly after the underwater earthquake. Yes you heard me, underwater earthquake. In Scotland. Underwater. This is explained by the line "Actually Scotland is located on a large tectonic fault." For comparison; this is similar for the overlook hotel to get randomly swept away by a tsunami in the Shining and having dick halloran and a policeman standing over the ruins and the policeman explaining "Actually Colorado has quite a large coastline."
But maybe I'd let that one pass. Serious doubts were added when the action flitted back to a sandy rock a.k.a Afghanistan for no reason other than to get the yearly exotic Asian fix in.
Slowly other incidents crept in. Such as the sub-tropical nature of Scotland I had not noticed. Or the fact that a community entirely dependent on tourism asserts "We don't like outsiders." And random scenes for no apparent reason are dubbed. Badly.
From here things simply got worse; the police force apparently in unison with the local populace seems determined at destroying the economy with the repeated assertion he wants no more of this Nessie rubbish. The accents go from low to low. The same CGI effect is repeatedly used. And its not even a good one; it looks like a brown log underwater.
Its not long before hippies swarm down from their climes and see Nessies recent carnage as a good reason for bobbing occult ceremonies. Nessie despite being the size of a small oil tanker has no problem entering low tide completely submerged and massacring the pagans without being seen.
The point were I cracked was when a major character randomly turns to another mid-argument and yells 'Is this because of our divorce?' She the breaks into tears. WHAT? Not the slightest provocation was dropped for this other than the sudden need for a romantic lead.
I went away but from those foolhardy to sit through I hear a stunning conclusion was achieved with explosives and what not. I'm assuming the two main characters realised their divorce was too soon and the evil overlord financing the operation from his New York lair got some kind of comeuppance but that is by-the-by.
My verdict: Aninsulttoallthatisgoodandtrue/10