Peter and Annie discover that Tim's not graduating from college, but he is sleeping with the next-door neighbor; Todd's cheating on his fiancée, and Sara's developed an odd attachment to a bird.
Peter and Annie are mortified when they discover people are gossiping about their family. Meanwhile, the kids band together to get out of attending a book drive.
When Tim makes Thanksgiving plans with Maggie's parents, Annie decides to throw their Thanksgiving celebration early, but each family member's own agendas interfere with the special day.
After Peter grosses out Todd with an old sex story, Annie worries that their love life has gotten stale. Meanwhile, Todd tries to get even with a rival dentist by having Tim dress as a giant tooth.