Robots (2005)

Drew Carey: Crank

Photos 

Quotes 

• Crank : [Mr. Copperbottom is playing badly]  Well there goes our happy ending.

  Fender : Yo, it's a fusion of jazz and funk. It's called junk.

• Madame Gasket : Who are these losers?

  Fender : We, sir...

  Madame Gasket : I'm a woman.

  Crank : Ouch.

  Fender : [Scottish accent]  We've come to rescue our friend, you evil bag of bolts, and you shall be defeated by the very outmodes that you scorn and detest!

  Crank : 'Cause there's seven of us and only one of...

  [hundreds of minions appear from behind Madame Gasket] 

  Fender : Let's see, there's seven of us and... eight? Nine?

  Crank : Did you count that one?

  Fender : I think so. Will you all quit moving around? It's so frustrating! I think I counted one of you twice!

  Madame Gasket : While you're at it, count these!

  [Ratchet's new outmode bot destroying machines come into view with Ratchet sitting on top of one of them] 

  Madame Gasket : As soon as we're done with you, these hit the streets!

  Ratchet : This will be the last day any outmode will ever see!

• Crank : Never try, never fail. Those are the words I live by.

• Rodney Copperbottom : Hey Fender.

  [Rodney does arm farts] 

  Fender : Yeah Baby, let 'er rip!

  [Rodney and Fender are doing arm farts] 

  Crank : What are you guys, 3 years old? This is how a man does it.

  [Crank does arm farts] 

  Piper : You guys are SO gross! Besides, this is how you do it.

  [Piper does arm farts] 

  Aunt Fanny : Hey kids, get a load of this...

  [does BIG farts; Everyone is grossed out] 

  Piper : Aunt Fanny, we were using our arms!

  Crank : Ugh, light a match!

  Lamppost : Lady... please... see a doctor...

  Lamppost : [the lamppost passes out] 

• Piper : Did I miss the butt wuppin'?

  Crank , Fender , Rodney Copperbottom , Lug , Cappy : [surrounded by menacing machines, everyone freezes, staring at her and then move again]  No.

  Crank : Actually, you're a little early.

  Piper : [the rest of the wall falls down, revealing an army of outmoded robots behind her, chanting "Rodney! Rodney! Rodney!"]  Then let's get started!

  Fender : Testify, sister!

  Rodney Copperbottom : Charge!

  Piper : Come on!

  [All the bots move in to attack] 

• Piper : Am I too late for the butt-whooping?

  Crank : Actually, you're a bit early.

  Piper : Great!

• Lug : Hey, Fender, have you lost weight?

  Crank : Lost weight? Look at... will you look at... He's a head in a basket!

• Crank : Oh, man! This is my third oil change today. Something's wrong with me.

• Crank : [Rodney and Fender are having an arm-farting competition and he can hear them]  Hey, guys! Come on, what are you? Three years old? This is how a *man* does it!

  [Crank lets out a big arm fart] 

  Piper : [from the next room]  You guys are so *gross*! Besides, *this* is how you do it!

  [Piper lets out an arm fart] 

  Aunt Fanny : [from the upstairs room]  Hey kids! Get a load of this!

  [Aunt Fanny lets out a huge, rumbling fart, not from her arm, but from her derriere, and it causes an earthquake] 

  Piper : [to Aunt Fanny]  Aunt Fanny, we were using our *arms*!