A real head scratcher of a film by Bill Rebane who appeared to be getting worse in his trade throughout the eighties. Three crackpot millionaires invite nine people to a remote hotel to compete in a last person standing contest in which the final contestant will be given $1 million provided he or she makes it that far. A series of lame pranks are pulled on some of the guests while the others engage in what most adults would do under the circumstances namely get shatfaced at the hotel bar. Most scenes are merely an excuse to focus the camera on various female body parts including an opening dance number that is a crossover of American Bandstand meets geriatric aerobics complete with hookers. If there was any hesitation that white people can't dance this scene hammers the final nail in that coffin. Pay close attention for the nipple slip. This continues on for about forty-five minutes until Bill Rebane begins throwing darts at various plot twists and whatever he hits becomes the inspiration for the next scene making this one incoherent mess. It's a game until it's not a game. The three old coots are in complete control until they're not. The hotel is possessed by a supernatural force until it becomes just props. They're dead until they're not. Even the narrator at the end replies that he doesn't know what the hell happened. I defy anyone to reason where Rebane was going on this one. The acting is dinner theater caliber minus the dinner. Most of the actors probably went back to their day jobs at the local Stuckey's. I give it a few points for the scene where the yuppie broad opens the closet and a skeleton is inside skull humping himself. Let's see Gone With the Wind do that! This Chilling Classics collection is really becoming the bane of me. Bane, Get it! Like Rebane! I hate myself.
22 Reviews
Very 80's and very strange!
Vampenguin23 June 2006
Well this was certainly a weird little film. Very low budget, very bad actors, very 80's...very strange!
The plot is basically just a confusing rehash of House on Haunted Hill. 3 eccentric millionaires invite a group of people to stay at their mansion to face their greatest fears. The last one gets a million dollars. Pretty straight forward, but they still manage to make it a jumbled, confusing mess. At one point near the end, the narrator even admits he doesn't have a clue what's happening!
The actors are exactly what you'd expect to see in a low budget 80's horror flick, which is to say that they couldn't act their way out of a wet paper bag. They do have some amusing lines, including the best pick-up line ever "I had a vasectomy!".
Really though, this isn't an awful film considering. It's interesting to watch, because you really have no idea what's going to happen from one scene to the next. Really odd and poorly made film, but still entertaining in it's own way.
5.5/10
The plot is basically just a confusing rehash of House on Haunted Hill. 3 eccentric millionaires invite a group of people to stay at their mansion to face their greatest fears. The last one gets a million dollars. Pretty straight forward, but they still manage to make it a jumbled, confusing mess. At one point near the end, the narrator even admits he doesn't have a clue what's happening!
The actors are exactly what you'd expect to see in a low budget 80's horror flick, which is to say that they couldn't act their way out of a wet paper bag. They do have some amusing lines, including the best pick-up line ever "I had a vasectomy!".
Really though, this isn't an awful film considering. It's interesting to watch, because you really have no idea what's going to happen from one scene to the next. Really odd and poorly made film, but still entertaining in it's own way.
5.5/10
Hello? Can anybody hear me out here?
Kelly G.28 April 2001
Wow. What a lonely page. It seems to me like nobody has seen this stinker. Well, I suppose I should say something, after all, the great Bill Rebane put so much work into this, it would be a shame to not raise my hand and say, "Yes, I am a loser who will rent anything with a bloody woman on the box cover."
Nine characters (Geez, that's a lot now that I think about it) are invited to a mansion where three screwloose millionares run a game involving deep fears, with a prize of 1,000,000 dollars.
There's actually a strange similarity between this concept and the current reality-TV boom, but beyond that The Game is pieced together hackwork, although it is admittedly better than some or Rebane's other films such as The Giant Spider Invasion (which I suppose one could enjoy as a lark) or Invasion from Inner Earth (where red light represented alien life). The Game still has that feel of the producers just making a movie tailored to fit whatever props and settings they had at their disposal. Which in the case of this film, would include a cabin, the live rig from some motel lounge band, a prop gun, a card table, and a monster hand puppet.
During the last fifteen minutes the "plot" gives way entirely, and the whole thing almost turns freeform, with the folksy narrator admitting that even he doesn't know what's going on. To prevent being deluged by letters and E-mail from millions of fans about the meaning of it all, the movie concludes with no end credits. But hey, at least the movie ended.
Nine characters (Geez, that's a lot now that I think about it) are invited to a mansion where three screwloose millionares run a game involving deep fears, with a prize of 1,000,000 dollars.
There's actually a strange similarity between this concept and the current reality-TV boom, but beyond that The Game is pieced together hackwork, although it is admittedly better than some or Rebane's other films such as The Giant Spider Invasion (which I suppose one could enjoy as a lark) or Invasion from Inner Earth (where red light represented alien life). The Game still has that feel of the producers just making a movie tailored to fit whatever props and settings they had at their disposal. Which in the case of this film, would include a cabin, the live rig from some motel lounge band, a prop gun, a card table, and a monster hand puppet.
During the last fifteen minutes the "plot" gives way entirely, and the whole thing almost turns freeform, with the folksy narrator admitting that even he doesn't know what's going on. To prevent being deluged by letters and E-mail from millions of fans about the meaning of it all, the movie concludes with no end credits. But hey, at least the movie ended.
Low budget and odd
irishjenny962 January 2006
This movie had what sounded like a good premise: 9 people facing their fears to win one million dollars. Unfortunately, it did not turn out to be a good movie. There are several scenes that are way too long and really pointless like the dancing scene. A few scenes are just an excuse to point the camera at female body parts. The acting is bad, but some of the lines are amusing in their awfulness. What's really strange is that towards the end of the movie it turns into like a 5 minute western, and at the end, the twists, of which their were several, don't make sense with the rest of the movie. It seemed as though the director just added stuff on because he thought it would look cool, while conveniently ignoring the plot of the movie up to that point. It just didn't make a lot of sense. The only creepy thing was the old people dancing down the hall, but that doesn't even come close to making up for the rest of this mess.
Games people play
moycon27 January 2006
It's possible you've seen this movie and didn't even know it!! How exciting is that!? Mill Creek Entertainment released a 50 movie pack last year (2005) Called Chilling Classics that includes this very movie in the collection. Only it's not titled The Game. No sir. It's titled The Cold Why did they change it? I am thinking maybe the were afraid of getting sued by Hasbro or some other game manufacturer. Either that or the print they had didn't have the title so they made something up.
Anyways, I liked the flick. People meet in a mansion to face their fears, and if they survive they get $1,000,000. It was better than some and not as good as others, but it did have a few creepy scenes. Like the guy right at the beginning. If I was him I'd be like. "EXCUSE ME! WAITER. There's a spider in my soup. There's plenty of chicks in this movie that remind me of 70's porn stars. That is, they aren't very good looking, and they aren't afraid to wear a buttload of make-up. Also one of them has a Wisconsin accent, so that always a turn-on. Eh?
The movie tries to be sort of a horror version of The Sting I guess, because the film makers want you to wonder what is going on right up until the end....Either that or the movie is just so crapily made i didn't know what what was going on until the end. In any case I give it a 5 out of 10... mainly for Wisconsin accent lady.
Anyways, I liked the flick. People meet in a mansion to face their fears, and if they survive they get $1,000,000. It was better than some and not as good as others, but it did have a few creepy scenes. Like the guy right at the beginning. If I was him I'd be like. "EXCUSE ME! WAITER. There's a spider in my soup. There's plenty of chicks in this movie that remind me of 70's porn stars. That is, they aren't very good looking, and they aren't afraid to wear a buttload of make-up. Also one of them has a Wisconsin accent, so that always a turn-on. Eh?
The movie tries to be sort of a horror version of The Sting I guess, because the film makers want you to wonder what is going on right up until the end....Either that or the movie is just so crapily made i didn't know what what was going on until the end. In any case I give it a 5 out of 10... mainly for Wisconsin accent lady.
No Award winner, but not bad
leCagot8 September 2006
Some tension, surprises, plot twists, humor, and of course, Titty. Watched DVD being part of "50 Chilling Classics Movie Pack" and was one of the better of the collection. The eeriest part of this 1982 flick was it's being the vanguard of the Survivor and other reality TV shows. Perhaps the TV creators lifted the idea from this film.
All in all I found the film watchable and at times very entertaining. The picture was grainy in some outdoor sequences, but sound quality was decent.. Considering some of the films included in this collection, this movie was quite good. It didn't take itself too seriously and had a good deal of suspense. Indeed, I found it quite fun.
All in all I found the film watchable and at times very entertaining. The picture was grainy in some outdoor sequences, but sound quality was decent.. Considering some of the films included in this collection, this movie was quite good. It didn't take itself too seriously and had a good deal of suspense. Indeed, I found it quite fun.
I have to agree with the other reviewer
Sic Coyote20 April 2004
This is one strange hacked together film, you get the feeling that the bond company had to come in on this one, I'm not surprised there's no credits on it, who would want to be associated with this film. The Acting of all involved is terribly stilted and the plot jumps around all over, it all makes very little sense. As I said before it looks like the bond company had to come in because it seems like there was alot of footage that wasn't shot that needed to be, and all the music was very ill-fitting library music (cheap I guess). Very, very odd. I might actually buy a DVD of it though, if it could let me in on what the hell was going on, and what happened to this movie.
Bill Rebane does it again...
leonardfranks20 March 2011
Warning: Spoilers
I'm obsessed with bad movies. I've watched a lot of them. Some of them I enjoy, and some I don't. But the movies that I've seen by Bill Rebane are inevitably the ones that just make me mad. The reason is that pretty much every other film maker out there, when making a movie, tries to make some kind of sense, or at least be artistic. I don't get that sense with Bill Rebane movies. I get the sense that his movies are written and filmed completely at random with no thought for what an audience might think about it. It's really odd.
So let me see if I can summarize the plot. We start out with a rhyming narration by Suck- tor Seuss, who explains to us that there are some millionaires who do random games. Then there's a completely pointless, bizarrely exploitative dance sequence. Then there's some talking and a spider shows up. We meet our annoying cast of characters and fail to care about them. There's a hunchback. Then a bunch of stuff happens. Throughout the rest of the film, things happen and it looks like people are dying. Some seem to die by human action, some by traps, and one by a weird monster. One turns out to be a cop and there's something about a madman. Then it turns out everyone's okay and some are working for the millionaire, including the pointless hunchback. Then they're not. And then the millionaires get betrayed and die. But then they don't. And even the omniscient narrator doesn't have a clue about what's going on. A bad sign for the audience.
If that sounds confusing, the movie's worse. For one thing, that description doesn't have the actors the movie does. The Cold also suffers from a weird lack of knowledge about what it wants to be. It just comes off as a random sequence of scenes, most of which go nowhere. I don't know how to compare it to Bill Rebane's other films. All I know is that it's terrible.
So let me see if I can summarize the plot. We start out with a rhyming narration by Suck- tor Seuss, who explains to us that there are some millionaires who do random games. Then there's a completely pointless, bizarrely exploitative dance sequence. Then there's some talking and a spider shows up. We meet our annoying cast of characters and fail to care about them. There's a hunchback. Then a bunch of stuff happens. Throughout the rest of the film, things happen and it looks like people are dying. Some seem to die by human action, some by traps, and one by a weird monster. One turns out to be a cop and there's something about a madman. Then it turns out everyone's okay and some are working for the millionaire, including the pointless hunchback. Then they're not. And then the millionaires get betrayed and die. But then they don't. And even the omniscient narrator doesn't have a clue about what's going on. A bad sign for the audience.
If that sounds confusing, the movie's worse. For one thing, that description doesn't have the actors the movie does. The Cold also suffers from a weird lack of knowledge about what it wants to be. It just comes off as a random sequence of scenes, most of which go nowhere. I don't know how to compare it to Bill Rebane's other films. All I know is that it's terrible.
Uh, all you can say is weird
artpf7 December 2013
Three bored millionaires gather nine people in an old mansion, and give them a proposition--if they can meet and conquer their biggest fears, they'll get one million dollars in cash.
All the reviews are correct -- this is one weirdo movie.
It's sort of like House on the Haunted Hill in terms of plot. But it's even weirder. The first whacko scene is a girl swimming in a chlorine filled fresh water indoor pool and what appears to be a shark starts following her!!!!! Only it looks as rubber as can be.
Crazy, right?
This movie was made on the cheap. The sound echos through out. It's very disjointed cutting from a whirlpool scene for example to some hippie singing combo. Many scenes don't even look like they are filmed in the same house or even the same location! And some of it appears to have been filmed at a cheapo hotel!!
There's one scene where a guy says he can't flush the toilet and suddenly the music goes all creepy for no reason whatsoever.
The movie is so bloody strange that I wish there was more information about it available. I'm not even sure the same actors are in it throughout!!! That's how bizarre it is.
There's also a girl in it who very strongly resembles Sarah Holcolmb who was Maggie in Caddyshack and then disappeared off the face of the earth!
Look for the guy in the sauna with the woody! It's that weird a movie. I also am pretty sure there is a former porn star or two cast in it. No nudity. Just a couple babes in bra and panties here and there.
And then there are the scenes peppered with silent movie music...why?
I was really hoping this movie would be bad-good but alas, I can't recommend it. It doesn't cross the line into camp. It's just weird.
All the reviews are correct -- this is one weirdo movie.
It's sort of like House on the Haunted Hill in terms of plot. But it's even weirder. The first whacko scene is a girl swimming in a chlorine filled fresh water indoor pool and what appears to be a shark starts following her!!!!! Only it looks as rubber as can be.
Crazy, right?
This movie was made on the cheap. The sound echos through out. It's very disjointed cutting from a whirlpool scene for example to some hippie singing combo. Many scenes don't even look like they are filmed in the same house or even the same location! And some of it appears to have been filmed at a cheapo hotel!!
There's one scene where a guy says he can't flush the toilet and suddenly the music goes all creepy for no reason whatsoever.
The movie is so bloody strange that I wish there was more information about it available. I'm not even sure the same actors are in it throughout!!! That's how bizarre it is.
There's also a girl in it who very strongly resembles Sarah Holcolmb who was Maggie in Caddyshack and then disappeared off the face of the earth!
Look for the guy in the sauna with the woody! It's that weird a movie. I also am pretty sure there is a former porn star or two cast in it. No nudity. Just a couple babes in bra and panties here and there.
And then there are the scenes peppered with silent movie music...why?
I was really hoping this movie would be bad-good but alas, I can't recommend it. It doesn't cross the line into camp. It's just weird.
One of my favorite Rebane flicks!
dbs630-697-9527949 September 2011
For some odd reason this movie has a place in my heart. I am one of Rebane's die hard fans. I love most of his work and can appreciate him as a trail blazing indie filmmaker from Middle America! I discovered this and "The Demons of Ludlow" on a 50-pack of DVD's and have been hooked ever since. I was disappointed to hear that the real Northernaire Resort was demolished in '95. This movie was lost. I wish I could find an original 16mm print, stills and posters for this movie! It has a very atmospheric feel all throughout the movie. Reminds me of Halloween back in the good old days for some reason. The acting is classic B-horror, the effects are just cheesy enough to make you laugh. It's just a fun movie all around if you can just take it easy and enjoy the travel back to 1984!
You expected Meryl Streep?
mmw-23 June 2008
I won't provide a plot summary (several already provided here), just some comments. First, other reviewers: Oh, come on guys. This is a fun little movie ... assuming you can read the synopsis off the Mill Creek "Chilling" box set, you shouldn't be surprised with what you saw. It's in the top 10 percentile of "Chilling". For an '84 movie, it had some plot, some character development, some humor, and a crazy ending. The plot is interesting and has some surprises (not to mention some puzzlers - ghost or dream?) The mood shift about two-thirds of the way through struck me as a positive ... a lot of fun (Benny Hill anyone?).
Now, I just wish I could find a copy of my FAVORITE from the era, "Bloodsuckers from Outer Space".
Now, I just wish I could find a copy of my FAVORITE from the era, "Bloodsuckers from Outer Space".
Fairly trite nonsense
chaypher21 March 2014
Warning: Spoilers
Rich old buggers invite a group of youngsters to a resort, to see if they can survive their weekend's trials of fear. The last one standing at the end walks away with a million dollars.
I watched this movie under the title "The Cold" and pretty much throughout the whole movie was trying to work out why. Don't think at any point I ever did. "The Game" at least makes some kind of sense.
This is fairly trite nonsense; the director shamelessly attempts to cover-up his weak script with nudity, dancing and a band that need to practise more. It wouldn't be that bad if he had something else to offer but - alas, he doesn't. The supporting cast are all terrible actors; indeed a few are irritating morons.
However, the indiscernible plot actually keeps you guessing to get you to the end, but when it eventually (thankfully) comes, leaves nothing answered in any satisfactory way.
I watched this movie under the title "The Cold" and pretty much throughout the whole movie was trying to work out why. Don't think at any point I ever did. "The Game" at least makes some kind of sense.
This is fairly trite nonsense; the director shamelessly attempts to cover-up his weak script with nudity, dancing and a band that need to practise more. It wouldn't be that bad if he had something else to offer but - alas, he doesn't. The supporting cast are all terrible actors; indeed a few are irritating morons.
However, the indiscernible plot actually keeps you guessing to get you to the end, but when it eventually (thankfully) comes, leaves nothing answered in any satisfactory way.
The Cold (1984)
stevencraigvankooten16 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
(the Game) Contains a bit of skin, no gore. Nine fortune seekers stumble into an impoverished version of "House on Haunted Hill" when three rich eccentrics offer them a million dollars if they can face their fears without leaving the island. The catch is that the island maybe haunted... and booby trapped. - - - Despite the nonexistent budget, there's actually some regional charm in this one. As soon as I saw the out of nowhere nipple slip during the opening dance sequence, I knew I'd end up enjoying this one. The movie starts off with a lot of momentum and adds in some fairly well executed fright scenes; however, the plot degenerates into the same series of uninspiring stereotypes and looses a lot of its gusto about 45 minutes in. Even the "Tales From the Crypt" ending wasn't enough to fully bring me back into the movie. Bill Rebane's not exactly a great director, but "the Cold" has enough moments to make it one of his best movies.
* * out of 4
* * out of 4
You can do anything you want to me... but not THIS!
hearse_for_hire20 December 2013
Of the films of Bill Rebane, a clearly Z-grade director, this one has the most sway with me. First off, the concept is drawn directly from the classic flick House on Haunted Hill. Three millionaires bring a host of contestants to a resort to compete in "The Game", where their fears will be played against them and the last one standing will emerge with a cool mil. Story seems simple enough, right?
And that's where it gets complicated. The plot is extremely convoluted. Other than the three millionaires thing and a series of random scares, a lot of half-cocked theories get thrown around, some people may or may not have died, or just left out of boredom, and even inexplicably return... nobody is who they seems and some people reveal sinister intentions, but then again there are no plot points that really tell you whether these crazy twists are tied to the main story, or part of a secondary plot tied in with the main one. Even the narrator eventually admits to being bamboozled.
Now all that probably makes you say, "Well, I would hate this movie." Yes, perhaps from a traditional plot-driven perspective; but take a minute to consider this film in a different light.
From a strictly visual/aesthetic standpoint, this movie does have something to offer. It reminds me of my youth in the suburbs, where the carnival would come to town once a year. Like its obvious forerunner, House on Haunted Hill, The Game has a major connection to the carnival dark ride. If you ever went to a carnival you would remember one of these, where you took a rickety cart through a truck trailer full of plastic spooks and people in crappy ghost costumes. But when that ghost jumped out at you, it wasn't digital, it was in the real world. The thrill of surprise was there, and until you know what's grabbing you, all scares are equal. That ghost might be a carnival employee, or it might be your Uncle John's creepy friend from the shop you were scared of, overalls around his ankles, ready to bugger you. The smell of Old Spice and denim may have scarred you for life at that sad moment in 1987. I'm sorry, I have revealed too much.
But, despite glaring flaws, The Game is redeeming in its visual/film sleaze factor. Gritty grimy film stock, garish coloration, bad film music that I am pretty sure is some of the same as in Bloodsucking Freaks (high camp piano that sounds like a villain from a western), arguably the best "white folks dancing" scene in history(!), and great 70s/80s cusp bad haircuts. The acting is porno-caliber, and I kept wondering whether this was going to turn into a porno at some point, especially given my previous experience with such wacko 70's fare as Sex Seance and Horror Whore (AKA Hard Gore). There's an eye candy factor to the girls. Miss Shelley is cute. Her dingbat antics are hammy yet endearing; a big part of the flick's personality. Cindy is definitely a hottie. I would gladly have stood in a line to audition for the role of the puking hand puppet that came up through her mattress. I found myself wondering if they ever were in anything else, but I'll leave it to my fellow net-nerds to figure that out.
That said, it's not even C-grade acting, absolute crap for traditional production, but fun for a party flick for the crew to cackle about and awesome as stock footage or to make people wonder, WTF did that come from? What's 80 minutes of your life? Grab a nice beer and decide for yourself.
And that's where it gets complicated. The plot is extremely convoluted. Other than the three millionaires thing and a series of random scares, a lot of half-cocked theories get thrown around, some people may or may not have died, or just left out of boredom, and even inexplicably return... nobody is who they seems and some people reveal sinister intentions, but then again there are no plot points that really tell you whether these crazy twists are tied to the main story, or part of a secondary plot tied in with the main one. Even the narrator eventually admits to being bamboozled.
Now all that probably makes you say, "Well, I would hate this movie." Yes, perhaps from a traditional plot-driven perspective; but take a minute to consider this film in a different light.
From a strictly visual/aesthetic standpoint, this movie does have something to offer. It reminds me of my youth in the suburbs, where the carnival would come to town once a year. Like its obvious forerunner, House on Haunted Hill, The Game has a major connection to the carnival dark ride. If you ever went to a carnival you would remember one of these, where you took a rickety cart through a truck trailer full of plastic spooks and people in crappy ghost costumes. But when that ghost jumped out at you, it wasn't digital, it was in the real world. The thrill of surprise was there, and until you know what's grabbing you, all scares are equal. That ghost might be a carnival employee, or it might be your Uncle John's creepy friend from the shop you were scared of, overalls around his ankles, ready to bugger you. The smell of Old Spice and denim may have scarred you for life at that sad moment in 1987. I'm sorry, I have revealed too much.
But, despite glaring flaws, The Game is redeeming in its visual/film sleaze factor. Gritty grimy film stock, garish coloration, bad film music that I am pretty sure is some of the same as in Bloodsucking Freaks (high camp piano that sounds like a villain from a western), arguably the best "white folks dancing" scene in history(!), and great 70s/80s cusp bad haircuts. The acting is porno-caliber, and I kept wondering whether this was going to turn into a porno at some point, especially given my previous experience with such wacko 70's fare as Sex Seance and Horror Whore (AKA Hard Gore). There's an eye candy factor to the girls. Miss Shelley is cute. Her dingbat antics are hammy yet endearing; a big part of the flick's personality. Cindy is definitely a hottie. I would gladly have stood in a line to audition for the role of the puking hand puppet that came up through her mattress. I found myself wondering if they ever were in anything else, but I'll leave it to my fellow net-nerds to figure that out.
That said, it's not even C-grade acting, absolute crap for traditional production, but fun for a party flick for the crew to cackle about and awesome as stock footage or to make people wonder, WTF did that come from? What's 80 minutes of your life? Grab a nice beer and decide for yourself.
Z-Grade chad
Red-Barracuda28 March 2010
This complete mess of a movie was directed by Bill Rebane, the man partly responsible for the truly infamous anti-classic Monster a-Go Go. As I was nearing the end of The Cold I came to the unbelievable conclusion that this film was in fact even worse than that 60's shocker. The story – such as it is – is about three eccentric millionaires who invite a group of people to their remote mansion to play a series of macabre games. Whoever manages to last the pace and survive to the end will win $1,000,000. It's a very simple plot but Rebane still somehow manages to make proceedings verge on incomprehensible. Things happen. Characters are completely forgotten about. Nothing makes too much sense. And then it ends. Weirdly. I mean what the hell was that ending all about exactly? I guess you are left to draw your own conclusions. Production values and acting are without question of a pornographic movie standard. In truth Pamela Rohleder (Shelly) isn't even that good. She is so unbelievably terrible she's compelling. Sadly the same thing cannot be said about this crap-fest as a whole, it's just a bargain basement rotter.
Genius or stupidity?
BandSAboutMovies16 November 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Is Bill Rebane a horrible filmmaker or a secret genius? If we're to go by Blood Harvest, I lean toward the latter. However, every single other one of his films that I've watched so far has left me feeling like that movie is his lone success, his moment where the hundreds of monkeys all writing scripts for him finally got one that approached Shakespeare. Will 1984's The Game (also known as The Cold and we all know how much Mill Creek cares about getting the correct title on their films or letting you know that the same movie has multiple names) convince me otherwise?
It's a good conceit. Imagine if three millionaires gather nine people in an old mansion and give task them to conquer their biggest fears. If they make it, they each get a millon dollars in cash. That's the idea. What follows is a gaseous cloud that chases people, a 1980's looking amateur band rocking out, people sharing pickles at dinner, an Alien ripoff, people drinking tea with spiders in it, tennis playing, a hunchbacked mental patient who ends up being a British thespian, singalongs of "Jimmy Crack Corn" and so many endings, you'll feel like you're watching The Return of the King on LSD.
I haven't seen a movie that makes less overall sense that didn't come from the hands of an Italian director. Seriously, this movie is bonkers. Come for the swimsuit models, stay for the meta reference to Rebane's other film, The Giant Spider Invasion. I really need to watch this like twenty-five more times to really appreciate it and its not-so-subtle nuances.
Which Rebane made this, the schlockmeister or the auteur? I'm thinking the genius, but then again, some people think Claudio Fragasso is one of those too.
It's a good conceit. Imagine if three millionaires gather nine people in an old mansion and give task them to conquer their biggest fears. If they make it, they each get a millon dollars in cash. That's the idea. What follows is a gaseous cloud that chases people, a 1980's looking amateur band rocking out, people sharing pickles at dinner, an Alien ripoff, people drinking tea with spiders in it, tennis playing, a hunchbacked mental patient who ends up being a British thespian, singalongs of "Jimmy Crack Corn" and so many endings, you'll feel like you're watching The Return of the King on LSD.
I haven't seen a movie that makes less overall sense that didn't come from the hands of an Italian director. Seriously, this movie is bonkers. Come for the swimsuit models, stay for the meta reference to Rebane's other film, The Giant Spider Invasion. I really need to watch this like twenty-five more times to really appreciate it and its not-so-subtle nuances.
Which Rebane made this, the schlockmeister or the auteur? I'm thinking the genius, but then again, some people think Claudio Fragasso is one of those too.
The Bored Millionaires Tried To Bore Me To Death
Rainey-Dawn19 October 2016
Boy those 9 people were really scared weren't they?! Having sex, swimming, exploring the island, drinking, talking etc... yep they were totally scared for most of the film!! And the 3 bored millionaires watching and at one point put on scary masks to grab one girl, tie her up and put a knife to her throat and threatened her then ran out laughing... really scary stuff here! (Sarcasm).
This is one of the most boring films I've ever seen. It could have been good if they actually made a scary film to scare the characters as well as the audience watching but instead they made a film where the viewer just as bored watching as the bored millionaires.
If you want a movie that will put you to sleep, here it is... long drawn out boring scenes of people doing really nothing or stupid stuff.
1/10
This is one of the most boring films I've ever seen. It could have been good if they actually made a scary film to scare the characters as well as the audience watching but instead they made a film where the viewer just as bored watching as the bored millionaires.
If you want a movie that will put you to sleep, here it is... long drawn out boring scenes of people doing really nothing or stupid stuff.
1/10
Who's For Scaring the Kids?
bkoganbing30 April 2011
In this low budget horror feature three bored millionaires decide to invite some young people for a scare feast. The last one who flees the resort they're all staying at will win one million dollars. Or so these three promise.
The usual gamut of common fears run through this film, but in the end the kids so a bit of resiliency. If you want to know what that means you'll have to sit through this schlock feature which was shot on small change at a Wisconsin lake resort.
I suppose we're lucky in one respect, one or all of those millionaires might decide they're bored and want to run for public office. Or get a television show to feed the ego. Or think they can produce a movie and we'll get one like The Game.
The usual gamut of common fears run through this film, but in the end the kids so a bit of resiliency. If you want to know what that means you'll have to sit through this schlock feature which was shot on small change at a Wisconsin lake resort.
I suppose we're lucky in one respect, one or all of those millionaires might decide they're bored and want to run for public office. Or get a television show to feed the ego. Or think they can produce a movie and we'll get one like The Game.
Only watch if youre a Rebane completist.
drgreenthumb100117 July 2021
Warning: Spoilers
If there is such a thing. Also, only watch if you like multiple climaxes leading to a confusing conclusion.
As others have noted, even our Jack Palanced imitating narrator cant figure it out as he concludes the film for us. There "seems" to be a specter or ghostly presence, or is it all props and fog machines?
The 3 at the beginning talk about the year before "almost losing one" and how that would have been "embarrassing", but they lose a whole bunch of them here, Igor even tells the "cop" character to not go back and look for the others...so do they kill or not?
For instance, there are the 3 millionaires and their Igor-like helper, we know they survive or at least Igor does and they what, re-animate?
Then there is Jon, Joe and Karen, the 3 "survivors".
They are told to go back to a second hotel in town and their they will meet the rest of the players who lost, except their is only one person there, the male band member who was part of the couple. Everyone else is missing, which includes, J. D. Shelly, Aaron, Ronnie and Cindi.
Then the narrator kicks in, as cop Joe looks at Northernaire from a bridge, the narrator notes Maude, Horace and George are all alone now in the place, but then he asks, "Where are Shelly, Ron and Aaron?" Thats only 3 of the 5 missing people, I was actually sitting there wondering when I was watching all of this, was what happened to Cindi? We see her on the floor screaming at the fake hand puppet, and thats the last we ever see of her. We actually SEE and hear what happens to poor Shelly, or did it?
Im not someone who always need the ending spelled out for them, but for their to be multiple climaxes leading to a confusing conclusion that makes no sense, thats just egregious.
Ive seen a couple of other Rebane films, the decent Blood Harvest (starring Tiny Tim), and the lackluster and campy Twisters Revenge, (starring a Monster Truck) which actually takes Rebanes poor dialogue and grade-Z actors and ratchets it up. This films star seems to be the Northernaire Hotel, but at least their are characters you kind of care about, but dont.
As others have noted, even our Jack Palanced imitating narrator cant figure it out as he concludes the film for us. There "seems" to be a specter or ghostly presence, or is it all props and fog machines?
The 3 at the beginning talk about the year before "almost losing one" and how that would have been "embarrassing", but they lose a whole bunch of them here, Igor even tells the "cop" character to not go back and look for the others...so do they kill or not?
For instance, there are the 3 millionaires and their Igor-like helper, we know they survive or at least Igor does and they what, re-animate?
Then there is Jon, Joe and Karen, the 3 "survivors".
They are told to go back to a second hotel in town and their they will meet the rest of the players who lost, except their is only one person there, the male band member who was part of the couple. Everyone else is missing, which includes, J. D. Shelly, Aaron, Ronnie and Cindi.
Then the narrator kicks in, as cop Joe looks at Northernaire from a bridge, the narrator notes Maude, Horace and George are all alone now in the place, but then he asks, "Where are Shelly, Ron and Aaron?" Thats only 3 of the 5 missing people, I was actually sitting there wondering when I was watching all of this, was what happened to Cindi? We see her on the floor screaming at the fake hand puppet, and thats the last we ever see of her. We actually SEE and hear what happens to poor Shelly, or did it?
Im not someone who always need the ending spelled out for them, but for their to be multiple climaxes leading to a confusing conclusion that makes no sense, thats just egregious.
Ive seen a couple of other Rebane films, the decent Blood Harvest (starring Tiny Tim), and the lackluster and campy Twisters Revenge, (starring a Monster Truck) which actually takes Rebanes poor dialogue and grade-Z actors and ratchets it up. This films star seems to be the Northernaire Hotel, but at least their are characters you kind of care about, but dont.
Lame Game
darrenmillane4211 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Warning Spoilers (this movie will spoil your evening!) The game is promising at the start, nice bell-girls to greet you and you look forward to seeing them naked but you never see them again! The guests are not initially told why they are there but appear to enjoy being groped by their hosts and you wait for the swingers party of a lifetime.
But the hosts would rather play stupid pranks, drink cheap plonk and sing shantys than help themselves to some sweet action! They promise the guests a million dollars if they survive the game – if the character Shelley gave me a million I'd slip her 20 bucks and I'd say "get a haircut, you look like you've been sleeping a the tip".
Porno acting without the porn.
But the hosts would rather play stupid pranks, drink cheap plonk and sing shantys than help themselves to some sweet action! They promise the guests a million dollars if they survive the game – if the character Shelley gave me a million I'd slip her 20 bucks and I'd say "get a haircut, you look like you've been sleeping a the tip".
Porno acting without the porn.
Cheesy, low-budget, incredibly lame and hilarious
SusieSalmonLikeTheFish18 January 2015
Warning: Spoilers
I find it really sad that this funny little horror movie has a current overall rating of 3.1/10 stars. Sure it's cheap, sure some scenes were added in for no apparent reason, sure the script is bad and the effects are garbage, but that's what I love about these old low-budget horror films! It's so funny, you can tell that the actors were obviously having a ton of fun making it and knew it was lame, and the effects were so bad but weren't without effort. Ever since the digital age, bad CGI and bad acting, annoying soundtrack and excessive nudity and swearing has ruined low-budget horror. The Game is a classic, far before those days. It doesn't use bad computer graphics for effects, the crew improvised with whatever was available and worked from there, and ended up creating a very entertaining horror movie. My sister and I watched it knowing it would be lame, but it's one of those "so bad it's good" movies, one you can laugh with and have fun with. There are scenes such as a woman with an incredibly fake southern accent saying lines like "You can't come in here! I'm nude!" in such a high pitched voice that it's difficult to even think about keeping a straight face. I rather liked the soundtrack and the acting wasn't as bad as I expected at all. Will The Game ever be as popular as Resident Evil or The Ring? Probably never, but if you're a fan of low-budget horror like I am you'll definitely want to see it. At least if you hate it you can make fun of it.
Cheesy game with cheesy results.
HumanoidOfFlesh21 September 2010
Three old and filthy rich geezers are luring nine people to an isolated mansion to win $1000000 in some sort of an elimination game.The participants start vanishing quickly one by one...scared to death by snakes,spiders and ghosts."The Game" aka "The Cold" is an enjoyable horror flick in the vein of William Castle's "House on Haunted Hill".The acting is bad and the special effects are poor,but there is plenty of nudity and sleaze.The final twists are laughable,though."The Game" is just a harmless and silly piece of entertainment from the man behind "The Giant Spider Invasion".6 games out of 10.Check it out,if you have enough time to kill.
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