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9/10
This Ain't No Old Time Religion !
Nodriesrespect28 September 2007
Warning: Spoilers
One of few adult films to deal overtly with religious subject matter (others being Sam Weston's almost equally hard to see ACT OF CONFESSION and ANGELA, THE FIREWORKS WOMAN directed by Peter Locke - though some sources claim it was his frequent film-making partner Wes Craven who definitely does appear in a non-sex role - as "Abe Snake"), I long considered this a rare foray into heterosexual hardcore for gay sex film legend Toby Ross (CRUISIN' 57) and a true early masterpiece of the genre. My virtual friend Ashley Spicer, who has spent a good part of his life researching the movie's mysterious background assures me that this is a totally different "Toby Ross" however, further adding to the film's peculiar pedigree by ever so slightly suggesting the possible involvement of a moonlighting mainstream movie maven. According to his findings, the man responsible might be an African-American industrial filmmaker who had some cash left over from a professional assignment and surreptitiously shot this on the lam. Rumor has it that he died in prison. For the time being, not wholly unlike the mammoth meat on the late great John Curtis Holmes, I will allow this loose end to dangle !

Surprisingly solid acting - especially by the unfairly underestimated Darby Lloyd Rains as the confused swinger who desperately attempts to shield her visiting sister Tina Russell who also happens to be a real Sister of the cloth - enhances a thoroughly thoughtful screenplay about the differences between love (among men and women as well as the religiously inclined and their deity) and lust. Darby's husband, heavily tattooed Don - sometimes David - Allen, who turned up following a five year career hiatus in Gerard Damiano's freak show CONSENTING ADULTS, begins to harbor the sacrilegious idea of introducing this bride of Christ to their frequent group gropes. This leads to a great downer ending as he dies in a car crash on his way to defiling Tina, struck down by the hand of God ! Apart from the stars, cast includes major performers like Andrea True, Eric Edwards, Helen Madigan and Arlana Blue from Howard Ziehm's HONEYPIE, though mostly in orgy action, along with cult favorites such as Cindy West (also in Locke's elusive IT HAPPENED IN Hollywood), French Any Mathieu from Chuck Vincent's BLUE SUMMER and Jerome Hamlin's loopy INVASION OF THE LOVE DRONES and perky blonde Chris Jordan, Edwards' erstwhile spouse who abandoned explicit for simulated movies and was to become Joe Sarno's muse in ABIGAIL LESLEY IS BACK IN TOWN and CONFESSIONS OF A YOUNG American HOUSEWIFE.

Gorgeous production design and often highly imaginative fantasy sex scenes, including such warped delights as Marc Stevens employing a Samurai sword to slice a zucchini precariously perched on a naked nun's throat and ravishing Russell lasciviously leering down from a crucifix, mark this out as an although almost unheard of still absolutely worthy film some maverick company should have the courage to put out on DVD, provided they could locate a copy. None has surfaced so far so perhaps no material survives. That would be a sad thing indeed. I had the immeasurable good fortune to see this incredible movie, slightly cut to meet contemporary community standards, at my local porno palace, the Ritz theater, which closed its doors for good in the Spring of 1985. While I have done my best to destroy as many brain cells as I possibly could through booze, drugs and bouts of casual binge sex in the intervening 25 years, the film still stands out in my otherwise permanently hazy memory, a true testament to its power. Hell, I may be one of the few remaining who can still testify to its existence, like one of those story tellers of yore, traveling from village to village, keeping a noble knight's exploits alive through word of mouth !
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