Auntie Mame (1958)

Fred Clark: Dwight Babcock

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dwight Babcock : I dropped by the Bixby School. And what do I find? I find he isn't even registered there - he never has been. So I've been hunting through every low, crockpot school in this town, and I finally found him, in the lowest of them all!

  Mame Dennis : Mr. Page is a progressive educator...

  Dwight Babcock : There they were, a schoolroom full of them: boys, girls, teachers, romping around stark naked, bare as the day they were born!

  Mame Dennis : I assure you that the children under Mr. Page's care were engaged in normal, healthful, broadening pursuits.

  Dwight Babcock : Broadening? You show 'em what you were doing when I broke into that place. Go ahead, show them.

  Patrick Dennis : We were just playing Fish Families.

  Dwight Babcock : Fish Families!

  Patrick Dennis : It's part of "constructive play".

  Dwight Babcock : Now, listen to this.

  Mame Dennis : Show me now, darling - show me.

  Patrick Dennis : Well, we do it right after yogurt time. Mrs. Page and all the girls crouch down on the floor under the sun lamps. And they pretend to be lady fishes, depositing their eggs in the sand. Then Mr. Page and all the boys do what gentlemen fish do.

  Mame Dennis : ...What could be more wholesome or natural?

• Dwight Babcock : For nine years, Mame Dennis Burnside, I have done everything in my power to protect this boy from your idiotic, cockeyed nincompoopery.

• Dwight Babcock : [Angrily]  I am going to turn this kid into a decent, God-fearing Christian if I have to break every bone in his body!

• [Mame is hosting a dinner party for the snobbish Upsons. Her butler, Mr. Ito, serves the hors d'oeuvres] 

  Gloria Upson : [tasting one]  Mmm, this is spicy! Try one of the little striped ones, Moms.

  Dwight Babcock : These *are* tasty!

  Doris Upson : What are they, dear?

  Mame Dennis : Oh, just plain old pickled rattlesnake.

  [Mr. Upson spits out his hors d'oeurve into his flaming drink. Everyone looks disgusted] 

  Mame Dennis : They're pure protein. And they always marinate them after they remove the fangs.

• Acacius Page : Haven't we met before?

  Dwight Babcock : I don't recognize the face.