I recently watched this "movie," and my words cannot adequately describe the awfulness. I can already hear you saying, "If it was that awful, why'd you give it 2 stars then?" Because the sound quality was the least awful thing about this. I hate having to turn the volume up, only to have it blow out your eardrums a few minutes later, so kudos to the only person who did a good job.
Where to begin?
* The cast's average age is north of 35 years old. One of them was 40+ years old at the time of them filming. It's jarring to see people as old as I am pretending to be in High School.
* The story is not remotely scary, especially for a movie about the most terrifying haunted house ever conceived.
* The dialogue is... let's say problematic. "Gay" is used to describe lame things. The characters even call each other retarded. I guess if their intention was to write dialogue that sounded like something high school kids would say circa 1998, then mission accomplished. It's 2022 though, and we should strive to be better.
* Every single person both over-acted and under-acted their roles. Some parts of the movie introduced new character information, seemingly at random. I'm still not sure what the 40 year old blonde had happen to her. In some parts, she's pregnant, in others, she's being yelled at by a religious mom. I watched the movie and I'm not sure she's actually pregnant, or if she was going to get kicked out for having a boyfriend. One of the male actors even appeared to have a backstory where he may have killed someone with his car, but it lasted for 15 seconds before it was abandoned and never brought up again.
As near as I can tell, the only reason this movie got made was to launder money. Or maybe they used the bulk of their budget to pay for a Fleetwood Mac sized pile of cocaine. Regardless, do not waste an hour and a half of your life.
Where to begin?
* The cast's average age is north of 35 years old. One of them was 40+ years old at the time of them filming. It's jarring to see people as old as I am pretending to be in High School.
* The story is not remotely scary, especially for a movie about the most terrifying haunted house ever conceived.
* The dialogue is... let's say problematic. "Gay" is used to describe lame things. The characters even call each other retarded. I guess if their intention was to write dialogue that sounded like something high school kids would say circa 1998, then mission accomplished. It's 2022 though, and we should strive to be better.
* Every single person both over-acted and under-acted their roles. Some parts of the movie introduced new character information, seemingly at random. I'm still not sure what the 40 year old blonde had happen to her. In some parts, she's pregnant, in others, she's being yelled at by a religious mom. I watched the movie and I'm not sure she's actually pregnant, or if she was going to get kicked out for having a boyfriend. One of the male actors even appeared to have a backstory where he may have killed someone with his car, but it lasted for 15 seconds before it was abandoned and never brought up again.
As near as I can tell, the only reason this movie got made was to launder money. Or maybe they used the bulk of their budget to pay for a Fleetwood Mac sized pile of cocaine. Regardless, do not waste an hour and a half of your life.