The Brainiac (1962)
3/10
Such a polite monster, except when he just stares at you awkwardly...
25 July 2020
Warning: Spoilers
Yes, this film is called Brainiac for its English release and no, the villain her is not a super intelligent computer or sentient being. He is a strange looking and probably hastily put together monster that eats brains! Well, he apparently sucks brains out through his elongated tongue then someone spits it out into an oversized goblet thus, reassembling the brains and eats them later, usually out in the open of his castle, instead of in his private chambers. This monster comes to us from Mexico so from the Mexican title I am going to say it translates into The Baron of Terror rather than Brainiac.

The story has a man accused of witchery and stuff of that nature. He is not really getting the fairest of trials, but apparently he has not exactly been denying what they are accusing him of. A man testifies on his behalf only to receive 200 lashes from a whip for doing so. Wow, tough justice system. Well he is burned, but not before stating that he will come back and kill each one of their ancestors. 300 years later he is back and lucky him, he finds all the people he needs to kill all residing in the same city and each person apparently only has one heir. Guess that makes this easy for Brainiac. He throws a party then proceeds to kill them all, he could have just killed them all as this would have made the police not immediately know who it was, but the Baron is a gentleman!

The story does not work, not in the least and I am surprised the film has such a high score here. The main problem is why does the Baron even want revenge? He did not really need it as he displayed his powers, looks to me as if he could have escaped at any time, but just decided to let the people burn him at the stake. Also, was he a strange brain eating monster before his ascension into the heavens, or was that strictly something that came about due to his resurrection? There is also a woman that he wants revenge, but before he attempts to kill her he professes his love for her which seemingly came out of nowhere.

So the film did not work, too many lingering questions and to many scenes that amounted to the Baron looking upon people in very awkward silence while a male victim would be looking all crazy with their eyes bulging. I do not understand the goblet of brains, because he was sucking people's brains out, the coroner said so and yet he has a giant goblet full of fully formed brains. Not sure why they titled this Brainiac in the U.S. as that does usually denote intelligence and the Baron displayed little of this during his quest for revenge.
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