The Titan (2018)
1/10
Pointless and terrible
12 April 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Humanity is doomed, with half of its population apparently going to die within the next 15 years because of food shortage and war. So what's the solution? Turn everyone into fishpeople so they can swim in the methane oceans of Titan.

But how? Well, we have a crazy scientist alter our test subject's DNA basically overnight!

But that doesn't go as planned, right? No, of course not! Because only one test subject manages to survive and what's left of him can't be called human anymore by any reasonable standard; he is fishman!

But doesn't that defeat the entire purpose of saving humanity and our society? Of course it does!

And then the movie ends, with fishman as the lone inhabitant of Titan, looking over its surface. He made it, yay! And his wife back on Earth still loves him. Now what is he going to do? I don't know, swim? I hope there's food for him over there!

Haha, just wow. This movie is so preposterous on so many levels, I don't even know where to start or end. I could write a long list of other terrible things about this movie, but considering the fact that it already wasted 90 minutes of my time, I'll just stop here.

It's bad, it's really bad. It's not even so bad it's good. Just, no. I hardly ever give a movie a 1/10, but here you go, you deserve it.
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