My husband and I sat down to watch this one Sunday evening and it was so bad I almost turned it off. But inertia is a powerful force and passively sitting through the movie in its entirety seemed easier than trying to figure out who was sitting on the remote.
I wanted to like Pan. I really did. It was one of my favorite Disney movies as a kid and a live action origin story sounded fun and exciting. However, the movie completely missed the mark.
The first act of the movie takes place in an orphanage taken straight from Oliver Twist. Corrupt nuns hoard rations and abuse children, ultimately selling them off to fantastical pirates. The head nun resembles more of a deranged terrier with her growling and barking than an actual person. One dimensional characters aside, Levi Miller shines as Peter, a brave, clever, and mischievous child.
It's when the pirates enter as cirque du soleil style abductors that the movie starts to fall apart. For some reason they have been abducting children from the orphanage in pairs until the fateful night that Peter is abducted that they seem to be gunning for the entire population of the orphanage. Not sure how the nuns were going to explain that away. Whoever designed the pirate costumes couldn't decide whether they were trying to channel Mad Max or Burning Man. There was no common thematic approach, which just made the lot look disorganized and in-cohesive.
Anyway, the kids are taken aboard a flying pirate ship that proceeds to engage in a gun battle with London fighter pilots before hitting turbo boost and traveling to Neverland. This is where I almost turned off the movie. The kids are thrown into a mining pit with thousands of other slaves and then enters Blackbeard (Hugh Jackman) to the forced chorus of Smells Like Team Spirit by Nirvana. Yeah, did I mention that this was supposed to be taking place during WWII? The inclusion of the song only served as a distraction, did nothing to further the story line or set the scene. Jackman's version of Blackbeard can't figure out if he is supposed to be evil and menacing or more slapstick. Either way the character comes across as obnoxious and annoying.
It's about this time that Peter is introduced to James Hook played by Garret Hedlund who proceeds to channel a weird Jack Nicholson-esque rendition of Hook. I kept expecting him to bust out the phrase, "Here's Johnny!" Some things happen. Peter learns that he may be the "chosen one" from a prophesy and Hook helps him escape the mines.
They eventually come upon the natives, the leader, Tiger Lily, is white washed by a subdued and uninteresting Rooney Mara. For some reason the writers feel the need to insert a love interest between Tiger Lily and Hook, which doesn't work, it makes no sense, and it just leads to a lot of stupid simpering and lingering hand holding between the two characters.
The superficial side stories detract from the main story, which is supposed to be a hero's quest for Peter. At times Peter seems like a supporting character in his own journey as the story line meanders and doesn't do much in the way of story development. And all the while there is some over the top CGI that looks horrible and reminds you that you are watching a very bad movie.
The movie culminates with Peter leading the kingdom of fairies in a battle against the pirates in which the fairies easily win. As the credits were rolling I turned to my husband and asked, "So why couldn't the fairies have just done that without Peter?"
This movie could have been so good! The story could have been super simple and still magical. But the writers and director seemed like kids in the candy store. Too much star power, which they didn't know how to harness into great performances, too much CGI, which just comes across as fake and distracting, and too many superficial story lines that never amounted to anything.
I wanted to like Pan. I really did. It was one of my favorite Disney movies as a kid and a live action origin story sounded fun and exciting. However, the movie completely missed the mark.
The first act of the movie takes place in an orphanage taken straight from Oliver Twist. Corrupt nuns hoard rations and abuse children, ultimately selling them off to fantastical pirates. The head nun resembles more of a deranged terrier with her growling and barking than an actual person. One dimensional characters aside, Levi Miller shines as Peter, a brave, clever, and mischievous child.
It's when the pirates enter as cirque du soleil style abductors that the movie starts to fall apart. For some reason they have been abducting children from the orphanage in pairs until the fateful night that Peter is abducted that they seem to be gunning for the entire population of the orphanage. Not sure how the nuns were going to explain that away. Whoever designed the pirate costumes couldn't decide whether they were trying to channel Mad Max or Burning Man. There was no common thematic approach, which just made the lot look disorganized and in-cohesive.
Anyway, the kids are taken aboard a flying pirate ship that proceeds to engage in a gun battle with London fighter pilots before hitting turbo boost and traveling to Neverland. This is where I almost turned off the movie. The kids are thrown into a mining pit with thousands of other slaves and then enters Blackbeard (Hugh Jackman) to the forced chorus of Smells Like Team Spirit by Nirvana. Yeah, did I mention that this was supposed to be taking place during WWII? The inclusion of the song only served as a distraction, did nothing to further the story line or set the scene. Jackman's version of Blackbeard can't figure out if he is supposed to be evil and menacing or more slapstick. Either way the character comes across as obnoxious and annoying.
It's about this time that Peter is introduced to James Hook played by Garret Hedlund who proceeds to channel a weird Jack Nicholson-esque rendition of Hook. I kept expecting him to bust out the phrase, "Here's Johnny!" Some things happen. Peter learns that he may be the "chosen one" from a prophesy and Hook helps him escape the mines.
They eventually come upon the natives, the leader, Tiger Lily, is white washed by a subdued and uninteresting Rooney Mara. For some reason the writers feel the need to insert a love interest between Tiger Lily and Hook, which doesn't work, it makes no sense, and it just leads to a lot of stupid simpering and lingering hand holding between the two characters.
The superficial side stories detract from the main story, which is supposed to be a hero's quest for Peter. At times Peter seems like a supporting character in his own journey as the story line meanders and doesn't do much in the way of story development. And all the while there is some over the top CGI that looks horrible and reminds you that you are watching a very bad movie.
The movie culminates with Peter leading the kingdom of fairies in a battle against the pirates in which the fairies easily win. As the credits were rolling I turned to my husband and asked, "So why couldn't the fairies have just done that without Peter?"
This movie could have been so good! The story could have been super simple and still magical. But the writers and director seemed like kids in the candy store. Too much star power, which they didn't know how to harness into great performances, too much CGI, which just comes across as fake and distracting, and too many superficial story lines that never amounted to anything.