Review of Buddy

Buddy (2003)
Tiresome, phony, and manipulative soap opera
17 June 2011
Warning: Spoilers
Sometimes I feel sorry for straight people. They live such dull, constipated little lives that they really have nothing to make movies about, and yet they make them anyway. The results are so boring and trite (but they think they're great) that it makes me sad... until I remember that they have ALL the power, and then my sympathy evaporates and I get angry.

Buddy is a shallow, phony, sappy, manipulative, irritating soap opera about shallow jerks getting googly-eyed and sappy over girls and each other, circling and elbowing their rivals and strutting and posing and pouting and throwing tantrums, and, and, and... it makes me want to pull my hair out and wail with Peggy Lee, "Is that all there IS?" Is THAT what makes life worth living for straight people? Strutting and gobbling and rutting like turkeys? No wonder they are such goons.

Other reviewers have said Nicolai Cleve Broch should be a big Hollywood star, and I could not agree more. That is exactly where he belongs. Boring as hell and thick as a post, but he is a HUNK, and he is a SENSITIVE hunk, and, Man, can he pout!

It was not just that "guy" stuff that was tiresome - the women were just as bad, with a lot of anguished melodrama over the neurotic guy who could not leave his neighborhood, and the cute kid who just needed his DAD, and the good girl vs the hard-hearted harpy (guess who won!), and the miracle-working power of friendship, and blah blah blah - it just wore me out!

I guess straight people like this kind of stuff, and maybe some gays too... How would I know? It made me angry and nauseous and TIRED, and I was relieved when it was finally over. This movie is about as subtle and intelligent and interesting as a Bugs Bunny cartoon.
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