Audition (1999)
4/10
Waited ten years to see it...
6 July 2010
Warning: Spoilers
As a huge horror fan, it seemed like a crime that I had never seen Takashi Miike's "Audition." I kept seeing it in Blockbuster and Best Buy. I own several of Miike's films including "Ichi the Killer," "Full Metal Yakuza" and "Imprint." I've seen a bunch more of his stuff and I have liked most of it.

I found "Audition" to be boring and jumbled, messy and incongruent, and ultimately a let-down.

The basic premise is a guy loses his wife and holds an audition to find a new one. A friend and colleague assists him in the process and the our protagonist is immediately drawn to one of the applications. As to why, I have no idea...but he passes over several 'normal' seeming women and manages to dig up the freak. He falls for the broad, and she ends up being a psycho. We are given a very vague indication as to WHY this broad is so crazy, but basically she was abused by a former dance teacher and possibly some family members. In the end, she ends up graphically torturing and maiming our protagonist, punishing his body and pummeling his psyche; destroying him and mauling him.

"Audition" plays like so many other J-horror flicks for the most part. I was expecting it to be a little more clear. It was murky and I still don't really understand the whole reason for the woman being such a nut.

I did think there was sufficient comedic value in this flick, as with most of Miike's work. The part where the son comes in and finds his dad missing a foot and looking like a pin cushion made me laugh. Maybe I'm sick!? It's easy to see why modern movie-goers are impressed with this kind of bland drivel when films like "Hostel" and "Saw" garner huge box office numbers and millions of dollars. But for me, I'd just as soon pass it up for some of Miike's way more inventive films, or better yet, something like "Oldboy" or "Ju-On" which offers a true STORY and not just another dose of torture porn. Maybe I've seen too many Italian and Japanese horror flicks.

4 out of 10, kids.
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