7/10
Hair and Hockey Sticks
24 February 2010
Warning: Spoilers
Third, and third best, film in the St. Trinian's series. The decline in quality is gentle and, although it looks a bit tired, this one still offers a lot of entertainment largely due to some wonderful comedic performances.

The movie begins with the Fourth Form (Junior) girls burning down St. Trinian's and the entire school finding itself on trial for arson. The joy of the Barchester police and at Ministry of Education turns to gloom when Professor Canford (Cecil Parker) offers to provide a new school and promises to reform the girls. Canford turns out to be the dupe in a plot to abduct the Sixth Form (Senior) girls and marry them off to the sons of an Arab sheik. Off to Arabia in pursuit go the League of Incompetents: Flash Harry, Sergeant Ruby Gates, Professor Canford; bureaucrats from the Ministry of Education; and a Bath Unit (of highly trained ablutionists, no less) of the British Army. Luckily for all of them, the Fourth Form girls are on the trail too.

This film has two major shortcomings. The girls are sadly misused. There are none of the distinct girl characters that helped drive the plot along in Belles. Here, the girls are simply a horde of hair and hockey sticks. Consequently, the story rests on the adult characters with mixed results. Flash Harry gets entirely too much screen time and becomes irritating, and the romancing of Ruby Gates gets rehashed from Blue Murder. On the other hand, the alcoholic ablutionists are amusing and the Ministry bureaucrats are splendid. Indeed, Thorley Walters gives the standout performance as Butters the education official driven to neurosis by years of dealing with St. T's. When he suddenly breaks into a pastoral dance it is as hilarious as it is unexpected, as incongruous as it is apt.

The second shortcoming is that the film builds to a big, slapstick finale and then inexplicably skips out on it. When the hairy hockey horde comes careening across the desert in the requisitioned military vehicles – complete with band playing the St. Trinian's fight song – one expects, nay, one feels entitled, to see them rampage through the sheik's palace, returning much of it to deserty dust and banishing the sheik and his sons to maunder the merciless dunes. Sadly, no. The first vehicle crashes through the palace gate and we fade to the epilogue left only to imagine the mayhem that may have ensued. Sigh! Despite its faults, Pure Hell contains plenty of good stuff and remains a must see for St. T fans. The acting is wonderful with major talent in roles both major (e.g., Joyce Grenfell and Cecil Parker) and minor (e.g., Dennis Price and John Le Mesurier). And needless to say (but I will, anyway), it far outshines Train Robbery and the egregious Wild Cats.
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