Meteor (2009)
5/10
Sizzling meteorites, defective cell phones, and empty gas tanks-Oh My!
18 July 2009
Strictly for laughs, but it entertains so well on that basis. It's yet another rampaging rock from the cosmos, ready to blast us all.

A hodge-podge of "intertwining" human interest soap opera subplots parade by as the meteor inexorably wends its way towards the 3rd rock from the sun: 1) the physicist who's doing a Perils of Pauline impression. She's the key to survival or destruction, as she races the meteor to her goal. She's in and out of every life-or-death situation you can imagine, mostly contrived clichés that are so routine after a while they become ridiculous.

2) Army guys and scientists argue about how to use nukes. No comment necessary on this item; just have a good laugh. 3) There's a good cop and a bad cop running around trying to croak each other. It has absolutely nothing to do with the rogue meteor plot, and you keep wondering if this pointless side line will ever be tied in to what's going on.

Conveniently, there's always a dropped cell phone call. This happens so much you'll expect that cell-phone salesman guy with the horn rimmed glasses and 500 friends behind him to pop up out of the bushes. Nobody buys gas any more apparently, so every car in the movie runs out of gas in important situations (look for the character who notes the empty tank and then looks under the hood for some odd reason). Beware of meteor shards that zoom into nearby impact at just the right moment to drive the plot along. Scientific inaccuracies, as expected, are numerous.

At least it's as free as it is brainless. Plenty of fun, too.
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