Storm Warning (2007)
5/10
Storm Warning
17 June 2008
Warning: Spoilers
I'm gonna be completely honest with you, this film's plot is paper thin and easy to describe..two innocents, an Aussie barrister and his French artist wife get lost while boating on French Island and find themselves caught in a game of survival with three savage marijuana farming sadists with a penchant for twisted sex. That's it in a nutshell, the rest of the film shows how this non-cruel, civilized rich couple find the primal violent nature in themselves in order to somehow survive against sadistic Aussie rednecks, with naked pictures taped all over their house, their dwelling's a pig-sty, and each one could use a bath and fresh, clean clothes.

As in these types of films, Pia(Nadia Farès)is able to come up with nasty ways to upend her captors with designs on raping her. Hubby Rob(Robert Taylor) stumbles onto the farmers' barn of weed, rather loudly pronounces that he'll turn them in to the police when they escape, and gets his leg broken when attempting to save her from the inevitable. Poppy(John Brumpton)and his heathen boys, Jimmy(David Lyons)& Brett(Mathew Wilkinson)are quite the heavies, with their bulging eyes, spitting profanities in every sentence, and grubby appearances. The film is really predictable and you know how it will end. This is an exercise in visceral carnage as we watch Pia figure out a grisly way to halt a rape with the use of a broken bottle. We see how a booby trap using fishing line and hooks can really do damage when one walks unknowingly into it. We also see the effects on the human body when a victim is thrown into the spinning propeller blade of an air boat. And, for extra effect, we get a chance to see what a hungry, bloodthirsty bulldog can do to a crotch gushing blood. If you are looking for a gore film, this is especially for you. No deep meaning to be found, just a build up where these kind folks get lost, having to kill or be killed when facing dangerous, unsavory sorts who wear their stench and filth like a badge of honor. The innocent couple get modest exposition before they are flung into this difficult situation. The director of this film, Jamie Blanks, known for pulling his punches in tame teen slasher flicks like "Urban Legend" & "Valentine" actually doesn't shoot blanks regarding the bloody violence this time. Still, honestly, the couple do get off relatively easy..in most cases, they'd be mincemeat, winding up in Poppy's meat-grinder.
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