There's no way I can talk about Postal without first saying a word or two about Uwe Boll. Many people may not know who Boll is, but most hardcore gamers do (and probably most regular visitors to IMDb). Because he's the guy who has made a career out of making crappy movie adaptations for second-league game franchises. And I don't mean "crappy" as in "Silent Hill" crappy. I mean "crappy" as in "Ed Wood" crappy. His first movie adaption was "House of the Dead", based on the Sega game franchise by the same name. Now admittedly, this was your typical zombie slasher, and as far as zombie slashers go, it certainly wasn't the worst you could possibly watch. Still, it's a pretty bad movie.
But Boll actually managed to go downhill from there. His next piece was a movie based on the Alone in the Dark franchise. The movie sported an utterly incoherent plot, unbelievably bad acting, and abysmal special effects. Next up was Blood Rayne. The only good thing that can be said about that movie is that it features some nudity. He actually made a follow-up to that movie. In Blood Rayne 2, even the nudity was gone.
Now these are all bad movies. They all have bad scripts, bad camera work, bad special effects, bad cutting, bad pacing, bad acting, bad everything. The only objectively positive thing that can be said about these movies is that Boll generally manages to cast a surprising number of A-list actors.
There is, however, one other thing about these movies: They are entertaining. Now admittedly, they are entertaining in the same way that a train crash in slow motion is entertaining, but they are entertaining nevertheless. Even though the movies are objectively and obviously bad on every level, I still love to watch them.
Which brings me to Boll's two most recent oeuvres. Something strange is happening: Boll seems to be learning.
In the Name of the King is actually a reasonably good movie. As most Boll movies, it features an unbelievable cast. Jason Statham, Leelee Sobieski, John Rhys-Davies, Ron Perlman, Claire Forlani, Kristanna Loken, Mathew Lillard, Ray Liotta, Burt Reynolds I don't know just who Boll bribed to get these people to act in his movie, but it obviously worked.
But in addition to having great actors, the movie actually has a reasonably coherent script. There are still issues with pacing and camera work, but it's possible to follow the movie's plot and not constantly wonder just what drugs the writer was on when he managed to scribble it down. And there are some truly good special effects in this movie.
So In the Name of the King is an acceptable movie by Hollywood standards.
But not Postal. Postal is actually a genuinely great movie.
This is a movie the likes of which you have not seen in a long time. Remember The Naked Gun? Imagine a movie like The Naked Gun. Except it isn't afraid of making politically incorrect political statement. And except way, way more crass. This movie isn't pulling any punches.
The basic story is that a regular job-less loser gets mixed up in a plot by a bunch of Jihadists who are trying to release bird flu by giving children plush dolls which look like brown penises and have a TV show voiced by Verne Troyer. And it gets weirder from there. Basically, Boll pulls all registers, even appearing in the movie as himself, claiming that his flicks are financed by Nazi gold.
And it works.
Bolls inept directing skills (which aren't quite as inept anymore) actually don't hurt the movie. It's a comedy anyways, some strange cuts here and there just add to the movie.
--mild spoilers-- There's also a ton of gamer fan service. For example, Boll gets shot in the crotch, and the movie makes fun of "experts" who think games are to blame for violence. Vince Desi makes a guest appearance, too. --end of mild spoilers--
In the end, it's pretty much a no-holds-barred, politically incorrect two hour long episode of Southpark, except with real people.
Definitely worth watching.
But Boll actually managed to go downhill from there. His next piece was a movie based on the Alone in the Dark franchise. The movie sported an utterly incoherent plot, unbelievably bad acting, and abysmal special effects. Next up was Blood Rayne. The only good thing that can be said about that movie is that it features some nudity. He actually made a follow-up to that movie. In Blood Rayne 2, even the nudity was gone.
Now these are all bad movies. They all have bad scripts, bad camera work, bad special effects, bad cutting, bad pacing, bad acting, bad everything. The only objectively positive thing that can be said about these movies is that Boll generally manages to cast a surprising number of A-list actors.
There is, however, one other thing about these movies: They are entertaining. Now admittedly, they are entertaining in the same way that a train crash in slow motion is entertaining, but they are entertaining nevertheless. Even though the movies are objectively and obviously bad on every level, I still love to watch them.
Which brings me to Boll's two most recent oeuvres. Something strange is happening: Boll seems to be learning.
In the Name of the King is actually a reasonably good movie. As most Boll movies, it features an unbelievable cast. Jason Statham, Leelee Sobieski, John Rhys-Davies, Ron Perlman, Claire Forlani, Kristanna Loken, Mathew Lillard, Ray Liotta, Burt Reynolds I don't know just who Boll bribed to get these people to act in his movie, but it obviously worked.
But in addition to having great actors, the movie actually has a reasonably coherent script. There are still issues with pacing and camera work, but it's possible to follow the movie's plot and not constantly wonder just what drugs the writer was on when he managed to scribble it down. And there are some truly good special effects in this movie.
So In the Name of the King is an acceptable movie by Hollywood standards.
But not Postal. Postal is actually a genuinely great movie.
This is a movie the likes of which you have not seen in a long time. Remember The Naked Gun? Imagine a movie like The Naked Gun. Except it isn't afraid of making politically incorrect political statement. And except way, way more crass. This movie isn't pulling any punches.
The basic story is that a regular job-less loser gets mixed up in a plot by a bunch of Jihadists who are trying to release bird flu by giving children plush dolls which look like brown penises and have a TV show voiced by Verne Troyer. And it gets weirder from there. Basically, Boll pulls all registers, even appearing in the movie as himself, claiming that his flicks are financed by Nazi gold.
And it works.
Bolls inept directing skills (which aren't quite as inept anymore) actually don't hurt the movie. It's a comedy anyways, some strange cuts here and there just add to the movie.
--mild spoilers-- There's also a ton of gamer fan service. For example, Boll gets shot in the crotch, and the movie makes fun of "experts" who think games are to blame for violence. Vince Desi makes a guest appearance, too. --end of mild spoilers--
In the end, it's pretty much a no-holds-barred, politically incorrect two hour long episode of Southpark, except with real people.
Definitely worth watching.