This is the worst movie i have ever seen. Honestly, did someone shred every other page of the script as a practical joke? I'm not laughing. i'm still out 5 bucks for seeing the matinée... Thankfully, I saw it with a couple of friends who have similar guidelines for calling a movie horrible, and we entertained ourselves by making fun of the discontinuity, bad acting, dialog, "storyline", and "effects" (which somehow water down the experience...)
for example:
Discontinuity: "Places like this don't exist anymore" in reference to a picture of a park. later, the setting is... A PARK!
Bad Acting: i don't even want to comment here... none of the actors are excused.
Dialogue: Violet and the kid were on a first letter basis just minutes after meeting. I felt like I was watching sesame street. (This ridiculous movie brought to you by the Letter V!) "I have an army of 700 men here, what can you do against them?" "I can kill them" O RLY? YA RLY! thanks a lot for that brief insight into the world of verbal retardation. Next, please. "You got hemo blood on me... it is on." couldn't have been worse if he had let out a Darth Vader "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" from the bottom of his lungs. Why did the bad guy have to be stupid too? usually, if the main character has no depth, I root for the bad guy. seems reasonable right? not for this movie. the only conflict during the 90 minutes was which character was less stupidly, stubbornly static, and which one was closer to the capacity for thought I request in characters I like.
Storyline: thats the thing every movie prior to the making of this one has had because if it didn't, it would be just a random collection of actions. and that's exactly what anyone means when using the word storyline in reference to this movie. A random collection of actions. in a nutshell: Violet recovers some kind of weapon that puts all her people at risk. she discovers that it is a human child. she then devotes her life to protecting this child. which is a good plan, apart from the kid being an intolerable little brat, because she takes out 6 or more people at once with no problem. which is OK at the beginning of the movie, but throughout the plot (random collection of actions) she never meets a real challenge in a fight. oh yeah, don't forget a failed attempt at adding a love interest and a sense of maternal responsibility, neither of which make sense in the last 10 minutes of movie, and only robs you of brain cells to accompany the money you paid to see it. Storyline, my ass.
Effects: Oh yes. the "effects". the annoying sky captain style post processing which is applied to about half the shots. the randomly changing hair colors. the paper cell phones. the nose braziers... yes, effects. the only effect they had on me was in my stomach. I almost vomited snow caps on the guy in front of me. I wont try explaining to you how much I hate the effects in the movie. but I warn you not to try and find out for yourself.
Don't see ultraviolet. If you do, the Terrorists win.
for example:
Discontinuity: "Places like this don't exist anymore" in reference to a picture of a park. later, the setting is... A PARK!
Bad Acting: i don't even want to comment here... none of the actors are excused.
Dialogue: Violet and the kid were on a first letter basis just minutes after meeting. I felt like I was watching sesame street. (This ridiculous movie brought to you by the Letter V!) "I have an army of 700 men here, what can you do against them?" "I can kill them" O RLY? YA RLY! thanks a lot for that brief insight into the world of verbal retardation. Next, please. "You got hemo blood on me... it is on." couldn't have been worse if he had let out a Darth Vader "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" from the bottom of his lungs. Why did the bad guy have to be stupid too? usually, if the main character has no depth, I root for the bad guy. seems reasonable right? not for this movie. the only conflict during the 90 minutes was which character was less stupidly, stubbornly static, and which one was closer to the capacity for thought I request in characters I like.
Storyline: thats the thing every movie prior to the making of this one has had because if it didn't, it would be just a random collection of actions. and that's exactly what anyone means when using the word storyline in reference to this movie. A random collection of actions. in a nutshell: Violet recovers some kind of weapon that puts all her people at risk. she discovers that it is a human child. she then devotes her life to protecting this child. which is a good plan, apart from the kid being an intolerable little brat, because she takes out 6 or more people at once with no problem. which is OK at the beginning of the movie, but throughout the plot (random collection of actions) she never meets a real challenge in a fight. oh yeah, don't forget a failed attempt at adding a love interest and a sense of maternal responsibility, neither of which make sense in the last 10 minutes of movie, and only robs you of brain cells to accompany the money you paid to see it. Storyline, my ass.
Effects: Oh yes. the "effects". the annoying sky captain style post processing which is applied to about half the shots. the randomly changing hair colors. the paper cell phones. the nose braziers... yes, effects. the only effect they had on me was in my stomach. I almost vomited snow caps on the guy in front of me. I wont try explaining to you how much I hate the effects in the movie. but I warn you not to try and find out for yourself.
Don't see ultraviolet. If you do, the Terrorists win.