repoed2 Review of Aquamarine

Aquamarine (2006)

Um I speak 26 languages,blah blah blah,were royalists blah blah blah, oh yeah I'm also a ditsy mermaid!

[1/10 · 12 March 2006]

this is probably one of the worst films I have ever seen. It really has not point. It's tag line "a fish out of water comedy" is false. Through the movie their may be 1 or 2 smiles, maybe even a giggle, but i wouldn't really categorize this as a comedy. Heres the whole movie in words....So two annoying girls named Hayley and Claire (what exotic names!) constantly go to a beach club where there's this bulimic "hottie" who they love who's name is Raymond. They go day after day to stare at him and at the mean girls breast and complain how big her's are and how their's are not....skip to that night. There's a big mysterious storm that just happens to blow a mermaid in the beach clubs swimming pool. the next day the girls see Raymond and decide 2 go out. CHEESEOVERLOAD,CUE CHEESEDEPOSIT!!!!!! Claire falls into pool, mermaid happens to be residing in said poop. she screams and heroic Raymond rips his shirt off to reveal his sexy bod (ya right) and he jumps in to rescue Claire. CLAIR IS SAVED(and good cause if she died this early this movie would be even worse). end day 2 cue night 2.....Claire and Haley are eating gummy worms and go tot the pool they see the mermaid and are frightened but act like they saw their other best friend 4 seconds later(for all they know, she could be a serial killer). they become best friends..end night 2 cue day 3.....they bond blah blah blah...they decide that aquamarine likes Raymond, so they flirt.....not frontally but in a way ...CHEESEOVERLOAD,CUE CHEESEDEPOSIT!!!!!! aquamarine falls of bike, heroic Raymond jumps out window, rips his shirt off (YES Again!!), leaps over banister, and rushes 2 rescue. mean girl shows up and of course the frigid mermaid tells her off which sparks a necessary hate vs.hate relationship between them.... end day 3 cue night 3....they stuff the fish in a water tower.end night 3 cue day 4.... theirs a street fair and aquamarine goes with guess who! Raymond, they bond blah blah blah..oh no! its 5pm,aquamarine and her inflatable dolphin that Raymond gave to here must be shoved back into the water tower!...end day 4 cue night 5...nothing happens....end night 5 cue day 6.... the girls are at a bus stop, they go shopping, aquamarine yells like a 5 year old... they go to a dance......aquamarine dances with Raymond, she has to go back 2 the water tower...uh oh, mean girls follow...mean girl 1 finds out shes a mermaid, sh4e tells the news but all they find in the water tower is the stupid dolphin Raymond gave her...I'm getting sick of this and you are too so lets just say this movie probably ends like it sounds it would.