Review of Safe

Safe (1995)
1/10
A movie that makes people dumber
14 October 2005
Warning: Spoilers
I don't mean that the movie makes the people dumber because of misinformation or anything like that; it's because of the brain rot that occurs from sitting through the movie. The pointless meandering, the random subplots, and the pathetically thin two-dimensional characters will cause the death of at least a few braincells. It's almost as if a child was afraid of getting sick and started writing a story that they just got too bored with to bother putting in an ending or draw any correlation between all the events that took place in the movie. Julianne Moore, a great actress, gives a flat performance at best. "Oh, I'm a pathetic little sick housewife who goes to aerobics and hasn't had an original thought in my life." Not a lot of room for depth there! The cult leader is the most interesting character of the lot - but that just ends up as a big, "Huh?" like everything else in the movie. There was a fleeting moment where the whole cult theme, playing with people's minds to make money was about to get interesting. Apparently, everyone had to break for lunch before they could actually make it interesting. I suppose one could say that the movie makes you use your imagination - this makes sense, because no one involved with the movie used their imagination - someone should.
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