Usually a review starts with a small synopsis of the film. This is difficult when the director, Rick Sloane, forgets what film he was making half-way through and only gives enough of a damn to hand his camera over to his eight-year-old imagination. *Spoiler* Rick was molested as an eight-year-old.
This movie starts off in an abandoned movie lot (sigh) where the protagonist, Kevin, starts his new job as an undoubtedly small- genitalled night-watch man. The old-hat night-watch mentor guy tells Kevin that he can't open the vault for no particular reason. At some point, the vault gets opened and the hobgoblins escape. The hobgoblins are capable of making people's wishes come true and funnily enough *spoiler* every character's deepest wish costs less than twenty-dollars and never involves naked boobs. According to the old guy, they have to get the hobgoblins back into the vault before dawn or else – you guessed it – something. We never find out what 'something' is, but it's only mentioned about twice before the script runs out and the cast improvises the rest of the film. There's a rake-fight in there somewhere and something to do with a nunchuk bikie fight(ish) so that Kevin can impress his hag girlfriend. The best part is the end *spoiler* when the hobgoblins go back to the vault for no reason all and the old security guard blows it up because, well, screw the audience, they've stopped watching anyway!
If I may be so bold as to use my own rating system: /10 when drunk: 7.5 /10 when sober: -smart
This movie starts off in an abandoned movie lot (sigh) where the protagonist, Kevin, starts his new job as an undoubtedly small- genitalled night-watch man. The old-hat night-watch mentor guy tells Kevin that he can't open the vault for no particular reason. At some point, the vault gets opened and the hobgoblins escape. The hobgoblins are capable of making people's wishes come true and funnily enough *spoiler* every character's deepest wish costs less than twenty-dollars and never involves naked boobs. According to the old guy, they have to get the hobgoblins back into the vault before dawn or else – you guessed it – something. We never find out what 'something' is, but it's only mentioned about twice before the script runs out and the cast improvises the rest of the film. There's a rake-fight in there somewhere and something to do with a nunchuk bikie fight(ish) so that Kevin can impress his hag girlfriend. The best part is the end *spoiler* when the hobgoblins go back to the vault for no reason all and the old security guard blows it up because, well, screw the audience, they've stopped watching anyway!
If I may be so bold as to use my own rating system: /10 when drunk: 7.5 /10 when sober: -smart