johannap Review of Spring Break Shark Attack

Spring Break Shark Attack (2005 TV Movie)

Hysterically cliché ridden, awful acting, and bad dialogue

[21 March 2005]

As a year round resident of Florida (one of the few under the age of 75), I have dreamt of spring breakers being eaten by sharks, lots and lots of sharks. My dreams were finally realized thanks to CBS finally bringing to the small screen a compelling story that needed to be told: "Spring Break Shark Attack." Simply put, this movie was hysterical. Yes, it was full of clichés, the worst acting this side of "Plan 9 from Outer Space", and terrible, terrible dialogue. Folks, the movie was named "Spring Break Shark Attack." (The name alone sends me into fits of giggles.) Were you expecting Martin Scorcese? Because of its God-awfulness, I can't remember the last time a TV movie made me laugh so hard. One can only imagine how good it would have been to see this monstrosity on a big screen.