Y'know what really gets my panties in a bunch? When a bad movie comes out, and then the people behind it go around to all the movie websites and pose as fans, leaving tons of "Oh wow, it was wonderful!" messages all over the place. I'm the victim of this sort of crap. I read reviews of Meat Market in a couple of places, and they were drooling with approval and gushing with praise. I encourage you to take a closer look at the other people posting here on IMDB about this and other Sub-Rosa movies. Notice anything familiar upon closer inspection? Yup, you got it. If the movie's any good, why do you think they need to trick people into buying it? Meat Market is a travesty. I bought this puppy because I'm a long-time Zombie film fan, and had heard that MM was supposed to rival Dawn of the Dead in its own way, even though the budget was low and it was technically a B-movie. No biggie, thought I, cuz I love b-movies, too. Eagerly I grab my new purchase and race for home and my trusty DVD player, a fellow movie buff in tow for the shared experience!
Right away I can tell something's wrong. The acting wasn't just bad, it was can't-watch-the-movie-because-the-horrible-acting-is-upstaging-everything-el se kindof bad. Truly horrible. Then I begin to realize that the writing was also at fault. The dialogue was just plain stupid. People simply don't talk that way; another distraction from the "story." I glance over at my friend (we're only a short way in at this point), and he's looking back at me like I just shoved an anthrax-coated toothpick in his eye. Back to the movie... Supposedly, the dead are walking the streets, and people are running for their lives, shooting at the fake zombies if they're lucky enough to have guns. Apparently the zombies only congregate where there are cameras, because the background is still filled with moving cars, and other "normal" aspects of life. Sheesh. Corpses that are "killed" miraculously appear again in other scenes, as do a couple of victims that I was pretty sure had gotten killed a little while ago. The police act like Keystone Kops, the make-up and special effects are just plain horrible. Wanna look like a zombie? Rub some blackout under your eyes and wrinkle your clothing. Viola! Tom Savini would be embarrased. The plot continues to get more bizarre and make absolutely no sense, and while you're still mentally trying to get this atrocity to make sense, you're hit with more strangeness from left field, such as vampires that suddenly appear in skimpy, ridiculous outfits and continually pose for the camera wherever it's at while spewing forth the worst dialogue in stunted, I've-never-acted-before-in-my-life speech.
I can see how this may have looked good on paper as an initial idea. Zombies and vampires, world falling apart, gun-toting survivors, etc. Yeah, sign me up, sounds great. Unfortunately, both the script and the execution of the idea (makeup, effects, acting, dialogue, etc.) are so bad the movie literally isn't watchable. My friend got up halfway through the film, gave me a dirty look like I'd just played the worst dirty trick on him ever, and walked out. I gave it another five minutes and gave up, too. Dirty trick indeed. On us. Do yourself a favor, don't even rent this. Even Mike, Tom Servo, & Crow couldn't sit through this one. You've been warned.
Right away I can tell something's wrong. The acting wasn't just bad, it was can't-watch-the-movie-because-the-horrible-acting-is-upstaging-everything-el se kindof bad. Truly horrible. Then I begin to realize that the writing was also at fault. The dialogue was just plain stupid. People simply don't talk that way; another distraction from the "story." I glance over at my friend (we're only a short way in at this point), and he's looking back at me like I just shoved an anthrax-coated toothpick in his eye. Back to the movie... Supposedly, the dead are walking the streets, and people are running for their lives, shooting at the fake zombies if they're lucky enough to have guns. Apparently the zombies only congregate where there are cameras, because the background is still filled with moving cars, and other "normal" aspects of life. Sheesh. Corpses that are "killed" miraculously appear again in other scenes, as do a couple of victims that I was pretty sure had gotten killed a little while ago. The police act like Keystone Kops, the make-up and special effects are just plain horrible. Wanna look like a zombie? Rub some blackout under your eyes and wrinkle your clothing. Viola! Tom Savini would be embarrased. The plot continues to get more bizarre and make absolutely no sense, and while you're still mentally trying to get this atrocity to make sense, you're hit with more strangeness from left field, such as vampires that suddenly appear in skimpy, ridiculous outfits and continually pose for the camera wherever it's at while spewing forth the worst dialogue in stunted, I've-never-acted-before-in-my-life speech.
I can see how this may have looked good on paper as an initial idea. Zombies and vampires, world falling apart, gun-toting survivors, etc. Yeah, sign me up, sounds great. Unfortunately, both the script and the execution of the idea (makeup, effects, acting, dialogue, etc.) are so bad the movie literally isn't watchable. My friend got up halfway through the film, gave me a dirty look like I'd just played the worst dirty trick on him ever, and walked out. I gave it another five minutes and gave up, too. Dirty trick indeed. On us. Do yourself a favor, don't even rent this. Even Mike, Tom Servo, & Crow couldn't sit through this one. You've been warned.