Review of The Convent

The Convent (2000)
Bloody Good Fun
4 March 2004
Warning: Spoilers
With the lack of quality horror films becoming more and more apparent, fans of the genre (and those looking to get into it) are left with nothing to lose by checking out the obscure titles found on the shelves of the non-chain video stores. Every once in a while, there is a surprise contained within. Such a surprise is the 2000 movie `The Convent'.

Directed by Mike Mendez (whose previous effort, `Killers', is very hard to find), `The Convent' is an exercise in excess and situational comedy. Far too often horror movies enter the realm of comedy unintentionally. As a small film, with a pea-sized budget, `The Convent' wraps itself, and enjoys, a cloak of playfulness.

The movie opens in the 1950's as a young woman decides to set nuns and priests aflame. just before laying a shotgun through them. It's an intro that needs to be seen to be believed. Unfortunately, as far as visual flare is concerned, this scene is never topped. We fast-forward to the present and meet a group of college kids heading to the long abandoned convent to spray paint fraternity letters. The mix of characters is so over the top you can't help but love them. Not a single role is taken 100% seriously and it's obvious that this movie is going to be fun.

Our college friends make it to the convent. Unfortunately, they are busted by two dope-smoking cops. I want nothing more than to go into detail about this scene, but it would ruin a surprise cameo that is beyond hilarious. As the group's bad luck continues, they realize they have left their entire bag of weed at the convent and must return. From here, gore galore and hilarity ensues.

The plot is simple enough and the movie is very funny (not to mention gory as all get out). We get a simply wonderful cameo from Adrienne Barbeau (whose performance in John Carpenter's `The Fog' is treasured by countless horror fans) and, generally, decent production values given the budget. My only complaint is that the movie is too short.
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