It's sometimes funny and often creative, and it's an improvement over its predecessor by default, simply because rather than only 5% of the plot being consequential, about 30% of the plot is consequential.
In fact, the best thing I can say about this "film" is that you can go to the bathroom during it without worrying about missing something; there's hardly anything important to miss.
Just like the last movie, this has a screenplay that desperately tries to find reasons to keep these characters in the story, and it fails spectacularly. 90% of the characters could be missing from the story, or replaced with planks of wood, and not a single thing of note would change.
The story just consist of characters wandering around and either chilling in the background or completing a task that has absolutely no bearing on the main conflict. It's a two and a half hour movie that should be an hour long.
Even though the magic is creative, it's so inconsistent and so confusing in how it works that it's frustrating to watch rather than awe-inspiring.
In fact, most of the things that happen in the movie don't make any sense. They rely on characters knowing things that they couldn't possibly have known. They rely on people acting in ways that are so unfathomably stupid and are not in line with who they were shown to be earlier in these three movies. It's a story in which not a single plot point can withstand the slightest amount of logical scrutiny.
The writing is so insultingly idiotic that at one point in the film, when a character questions a plot point that doesn't make any sense, Dumbledore actually says "Let's call it fate," ignoring the question entirely.
That was JK Rowling saying to her stupid mob of gullible fans, "Screw you. I don't even have to try anymore. Nothing has to add up or be consistent. You'll watch it and love it anyway."
Lastly, this movie has ZERO character development. Nobody learns anything, nobody does anything special, nobody even IS anything. It's a story populated by husks of human beings, and none of them are even remotely relatable or understandable. In fact, most of them are briefly shown and then forgotten about until the end of the movie.
Just as in "Crimes of Grindlewald," Grindlewald hardly committed any crimes, in "Secrets of Dumbledore," Dumbledore only has one secret, and it doesn't even have any bearing on the story. How fitting. It's false, just like this movie. It's barely a movie.
Stop making these, please.
In fact, the best thing I can say about this "film" is that you can go to the bathroom during it without worrying about missing something; there's hardly anything important to miss.
Just like the last movie, this has a screenplay that desperately tries to find reasons to keep these characters in the story, and it fails spectacularly. 90% of the characters could be missing from the story, or replaced with planks of wood, and not a single thing of note would change.
The story just consist of characters wandering around and either chilling in the background or completing a task that has absolutely no bearing on the main conflict. It's a two and a half hour movie that should be an hour long.
Even though the magic is creative, it's so inconsistent and so confusing in how it works that it's frustrating to watch rather than awe-inspiring.
In fact, most of the things that happen in the movie don't make any sense. They rely on characters knowing things that they couldn't possibly have known. They rely on people acting in ways that are so unfathomably stupid and are not in line with who they were shown to be earlier in these three movies. It's a story in which not a single plot point can withstand the slightest amount of logical scrutiny.
The writing is so insultingly idiotic that at one point in the film, when a character questions a plot point that doesn't make any sense, Dumbledore actually says "Let's call it fate," ignoring the question entirely.
That was JK Rowling saying to her stupid mob of gullible fans, "Screw you. I don't even have to try anymore. Nothing has to add up or be consistent. You'll watch it and love it anyway."
Lastly, this movie has ZERO character development. Nobody learns anything, nobody does anything special, nobody even IS anything. It's a story populated by husks of human beings, and none of them are even remotely relatable or understandable. In fact, most of them are briefly shown and then forgotten about until the end of the movie.
Just as in "Crimes of Grindlewald," Grindlewald hardly committed any crimes, in "Secrets of Dumbledore," Dumbledore only has one secret, and it doesn't even have any bearing on the story. How fitting. It's false, just like this movie. It's barely a movie.
Stop making these, please.