Ten minutes. That's how long I could stand watching it for. The opening scenes with a fake looking snake head appearing (maybe it stuck out in 3D?) looked extremely cheap, nasty and unreal. Then it started off like the old Bible epics of past with text telling us about the beginning. But even though it supposedly is a Bible epic (let me declare my agnosticism now), with a Biblical title and a Biblical text, it immediately deviates into fantasy, talking about a race of evil Angels and industrial cities? This makes Jacksons rabid rewriting of the Hobbit pale into insignificance. We are then introduced to Russell Crowes character teaching the children to respect the life of plants as he then becomes a martial artist and deftly disposes of four hunters. It was about then I checked the time remaining, and being just under 3 hours, I could take no more. This is truly an epic, an epic fail.
Review of Noah
