Time Bandits (1981)
5/10
Cult that failed to recruit
1 January 2007
I was very disappointed by this one. I suppose the definition of 'cult classic' is always going to depend on whether you turn out to be a member of the cult in question or not... which you can't know until you've tried. But the only reason I persevered through until the end was because I don't believe in slating a film unless I've actually seen the whole thing to make sure.

To be fair, while I was pretty clear that I didn't like it somewhere around the Napoleon mark, there were a couple of scenes after that I did enjoy; but the whole thing is wildly uneven, with long sections I found boring and/or distasteful. The level of the special effects is wildly uneven as well, with a Minotaur whose head is so obviously a mask I assumed he was supposed to *be* a masked gladiator, and some of the most unconvincing expanded polystyrene slabs for smashing that I've ever witnessed. (Maybe they blew the whole budget on Mycenae?) While there is a trace of the famous relationship to Monty Python, the affinity turns out to be with the bits of Python I originally found unfunny -- what comes across as random cruelty and ugliness.

My main problems with the film, however, apart from boredom, were the usual twofold pair: lack of empathy with the protagonists, to the extent that I actually felt a sense of relief when one of them looked like being killed ("One down, only half a dozen to go"), coupled with a resulting identification with the villain instead. Watching 'Evil' deflect the heroes' puny attacks with a wave of a hand, I'm afraid I felt a sense of warm achievement.

Good points: Ralph Richardson, Sean Connery. Bad points: the insufferably annoying lovers (clearly I've lived much too sheltered a life to get the joke about the fruit), the endless Napoleon (all right, all right, we got the height obsession the first time), the bickering dwarfs, the leaden satire of the gadget-obsessed household, and every scene basically being milked far.... too... long.

Clearly, either you like this film or you don't. If you like it, then the more the better. If you don't warm to the start, then there's no point staying the course in the hopes of improvement: what you see is what you'll get. I was carried away by "Baron Munchausen"; after all the praise I'd heard for it, I wasn't impressed by this.
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