- Cpl. Gabe Garza: Hey. There's kids holding hands.
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: Oh cute. Don't shoot 'em, Garza.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Lieutenant... have you gotten any word?
- Lt. Nathaniel Fick: I only get what's passed on to me from Godfather, and the only word he gets is from the BBC. If we're lucky, Saddam will back down, let the inspectors in, and we can go home. The important thing is we are doing our jobs by being here. All of you should be proud.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Sir, that's not the word I was asking about. I was... we wanted to know if you knew anything about J-Lo being killed.
- Lt. Nathaniel Fick: [pause] Ray, the battalion commander offered no sitrep as to J-Lo's status.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Look Brad, I'm a man! Just like you- only I don't look like a faggot and speak all educated.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: You know, it doesn't make you gay if you think Rudy's hot. We all think he's hot.
- Cpl. Jeffrey 'Dirty Earl' Carisalez: To think I believed the judge when he told me the Marine Corps was a superior alternative to jail. I should have shut up and done my time.
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: Once more into the great good night. Cry 'havoc,' and let slip the dogs of war.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: When my band opened up for Limp Bizkit in Kansas City, we fuckin' sucked. But then again, so did they. The only difference is that they became famous, and I became a Marine.
- Evan 'Scribe' Wright: Speaking of which - one of you guys still has my girlfriend's picture.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Dude, I hate to tell you this, but your girlfriend's kind of a whore.
- Evan 'Scribe' Wright: What?
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Yeah. Last time I saw her, she was doing all of H & S Company.
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: She doesn't deserve you, man.
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: The point, Lance Corporal: we're supposed to be a recon unit of pure warrior spirit. We're out here, 40 klicks in enemy lines, and this man of God here, he's a fuckin' POG. In fact, he's an officer POG. That's one more layer of bureaucracy and unnecessary logistics, one more asshole we need to supply MREs and baby wipes for. And worst of all, worst of all, the motherfucker doesn't even carry a weapon. When push comes to shove even Rolling Stone picks up a gun but this fuckin' shill of God, he can't cover a sector, he'll never hump ammo or Claymores. This is a fuckin' war and we're here as warriors, so on top of everything else that's expected of us do we really need to drag him along and indulge in this make-believe bullshit?
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Oh, no. Now not only do we have to worry about all the Charms you've eaten, but now Brad's just pissed off God.
- Sgt. Antonio Espera: It makes my heart heavy to see the white race stoop as low as James' mother has. At least if she was Mexican she'd be ashamed of herself.
- Cpt. Craig 'Encino Man' Schwetje: Doc?
- Navy Hm2 Robert Timothy 'Doc' Bryan: I'm all squared away, sir.
- Cpt. Craig 'Encino Man' Schwetje: Doc, I know the guys look up to you. I'd like to hear what you have to say.
- Navy Hm2 Robert Timothy 'Doc' Bryan: You're asking me to be frank, sir?
- Cpt. Craig 'Encino Man' Schwetje: Yes.
- Navy Hm2 Robert Timothy 'Doc' Bryan: You're incompetent, sir.
- Cpt. Craig 'Encino Man' Schwetje: ...I'm doing my best.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: This is really interesting, Brad. You know, Iraqis don't really seem good at fighting, but then they never really completely surrender either.
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: Put down that fucking milkshake and dig a fucking hole.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Why, so I can be more like the teacher's pet?
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: Yeah, that's exactly it. You should be more like Trombley.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: More like Trombley? MORE LIKE TROMBLEY?
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Goddamn Baptista! How the fuck would he like it if I joined the Brazilian Marines and only spoke English?
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: You know, Poke, guys in black pyjamas did alreight in Vietnam, too. You gotta respect the pyjama.
- Sgt. Larry Shawn 'Pappy' Patrick: Damn! I'd eat a mile of her shit just to see where it came from...
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: [running around a field with his arms outstretched like an airplane]
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: What did you like give him some Rolling Stone drugs or something?
- Evan 'Scribe' Wright: I don't know.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: What the fuck did you do to him?
- Evan 'Scribe' Wright: Just asked him what he would be if he wasn't a Marine.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Oh my god, he wants to be a ballerina? That's my fucking dream!
- Cpl. Evan 'Q-Tip' Stafford: Bravo Three's commander. Should I shoot him?
- Navy Hm2 Robert Timothy 'Doc' Bryan: Don't waste your bullet.
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: [to Person] Careful with the Rip Fuel.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Fuck, man! I'm on thirty hours no sleep! Beat the record I made in high school when I was on the debate team.
- Evan 'Scribe' Wright: Wait a minute, you were on the debate team?
- Sgt. Brad 'Iceman' Colbert: Whats the channel for the 119s?
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: [to Colbert] 64 and tad 7.
- [to Wright]
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Yeah, I was really really fucking good, but all the other guys on the team thought I was high all of the time.
- Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Hey buddy! It's 10 in the morning! Don't you think you oughta change out of your pyjamas?
- Cpt. Dave 'Captain America' McGraw: Shoot that fucking dog!
- Sgt. Eric Kocher: Darnold, give it a piece of your jerky.
- Cpt. Bryan Patterson: It's important to remember that they'll never take a recon marine alive...
- Gunnery Sgt. Rich Barrett: Oorah, sir.
- Gunnery Sgt. Mike 'Gunny' Wynn: We need to make sure the stupidity in this company doesn't roll down too hard on our guys.
- Cpl. Walt Hasser: Rollin' Stone?
- Cpl. James Chaffin: Fuck if they don't give us a dope-smokin', peace-freak writer.
- Cpt. Dave 'Captain America' McGraw: Godspeed. God-fucking-speed you!
- Sgt. Eric Kocher: Fucking Captain America...
- Cpt. Bryan Patterson: They want our help to clear a minefield.
- Gunnery Sgt. Rich Barrett: At night? That's against division orders.
- Cpt. Bryan Patterson: Solid copy. Now you copy this... I am not following that order.
- [Throws handset down]
- Cpt. Bryan Patterson: They want our help to clear a minefield.